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What's your love language? How to find out

Aeolienne

Well-Known Member
(Not written by me)

Quiz: Which of the five types of lover are you?

You've got a cold. How can your partner show their support?
1.
Get cosy on the sofa with you and binge-watch your favourite TV show.
2. Wake up at 6am to clean the house from top to bottom, so you don't have to.
3. Shower you with lots of hugs and kisses (ideally not catching the same cold).
4. Buy you a huge bouquet of flowers and order in your favourite takeaway.
5. Promise you that you'll feel better soon and everything will be okay.

You're hosting a roast dinner for all your friends and family. Minutes before you arrive you realise you've burnt the chicken. Now what?
1.
Your partner cancels everyone coming over and you enjoy what's left of the food (and drink) together.
2. It doesn't matter. Your partner runs to the supermarket, rebuys all the food and cooks it to perfection in record time. It's served late, but it's delicious.
3. Using a de-stress manual, your partner de-knots your back while you work out a plan B.
4. They order in a takeaway (and extra booze) so no one is the wiser.
5. They insist your guests are coming to see you and won't care about the food, which they say doesn't look that bad anyway (it does).

You get into a huge argument with your partner. What is it about?
1.
They cancelled plans with you to hang out with their own friends (and didn't invite you).
2. You asked them to do one job around the house, but it's been three days and they still haven't done it.
3. You book a hotel for a weekend of passion but your partner isn't in the mood to be intimate.
4. Your 40th birthday comes around and your partner doesn't buy you a present.
5. You have hangover paranoia and ask your partner if you made a fool of yourself the night before. They say you absolutely did.

You've been fired at work, how can your partner cheer you up?
1.
Run you a hot bath and listen while you vent your frustrations.
2. Take care of the bills and send your CV out to new employers without bothering you.
3. Hold you in a bear hug for 10 straight minutes.
4. Buy you a new diary and stationery set so you can start afresh at your next job.
5. Call and text you every day to make sure you're doing OK while unemployed.

What is your ideal birthday treat from your partner?
1.
Spending the morning having breakfast in bed together.
2. They've organised a day of activities and made a reservation at the restaurant where you first met.
3. Treated to a massage with essential oils, before enjoying a night of intimacy.
4. Receiving that expensive necklace you saw three months ago in a jewellery shop.
5. Arriving home to a handwritten love note detailing why they love you.

YOUR RESULTS:
Mostly 1s:
your love language is quality time
Mostly 2s: your love language is acts of service
Mostly 3s: your love language is physical touch
Mostly 4s: your love language is receiving gifts
Mostly 5s: your love language is words of affirmation


My answers were 2, 4, 1, 5 and 2 respectively. So not "mostly" any of the above.
 
5. Promise you that you'll feel better soon and everything will be okay.
5. They insist your guests are coming to see you and won't care about the food, which they say doesn't look that bad anyway (it does).
5. You have hangover paranoia and ask your partner if you made a fool of yourself the night before. They say you absolutely did.
1. Run you a hot bath and listen while you vent your frustrations.
1. Spending the morning having breakfast in bed together. (But nearly tied with: 5. Arriving home to a handwritten love note detailing why they love you.)

Words of Affirmation, followed closely by Quality Time.
 
Words of affirmation which means l am super easy to lovebomb. Lol.

I like to think that those all great solutions, and men rarely can get to that space. It's kinds of learning as you are in a good relationship. You just want to go the extra mile.
 
Doesn't this seem to all be about the partner? Is it asking what we wish the partner would do, rather than what they would actually do? So maybe that's not very realistic in terms of how a relationship would be, because the partner just may be different from how we would have custom designed them. My love language is real world logic I guess... ;-)
 
I also got all 1's but I agree with Thinx that this would be more like if I designed a partner for myself, rather than having a real one. A real one wouldn't put up with me for long lol

For the record, it would also cause an argument if I asked a partner to do something and 3 days had gone by and they still hadn't done it. I would be furious.

Sometimes I really do wish someone would snuggle with me every night though, and do nice things for me occasionally... but I have gone the friends with benefits route before and it always ended up being traumatic. I have never been in a relationship and I'm not convinced that I ever should be.

The more I learn about myself, the more I think it seems like I would do better with a sweet and affectionate (and more optimistic and less jaded) female partner, if I ever found someone. I wouldn't be a good match for someone who was also cynical, opinionated and hot-headed. So far all my experiences with men have brought out the worst in both of us.
 
Why am I always None of The Above?
That is the same result I got. The first question is a classic example, if I'm sick the correct way to behave is to leave me alone. Go visit some interstate family and don't come back for at least a week. :)
 
I agree with Outdated; when I am sick I want to be left alone.

But mostly, any of those things are nice. I'm not picky. After a lifetime of experience, I'll take any expressions of love and concern.
 
Somehow I see no point in taking such a "test".

But then I don't consider myself salvageable in this regard. I will die alone and that's all there is.
 
Last edited:
I had split answers for some of them - for #1, I'd like to binge watch a favourite show with someone along while having comfort foods.

I ended up with a mix of 1, 2, and 4.
 
I personally don't see the value of affirmation in a scenario like the second one (the ruined dinner), when what the hypothetical partner is saying is blatantly untrue. However I did choose the affirmation option for the fourth scenario (being fired at work) because frankly checking up on me every day would be of more practical help than sending off my CV without consulting me. Seriously?!
 
(Not written by me)

Quiz: Which of the five types of lover are you?

You've got a cold. How can your partner show their support?
1.
Get cosy on the sofa with you and binge-watch your favourite TV show.
2. Wake up at 6am to clean the house from top to bottom, so you don't have to.
3. Shower you with lots of hugs and kisses (ideally not catching the same cold).
4. Buy you a huge bouquet of flowers and order in your favourite takeaway.
5. Promise you that you'll feel better soon and everything will be okay.

You're hosting a roast dinner for all your friends and family. Minutes before you arrive you realise you've burnt the chicken. Now what?
1.
Your partner cancels everyone coming over and you enjoy what's left of the food (and drink) together.
2. It doesn't matter. Your partner runs to the supermarket, rebuys all the food and cooks it to perfection in record time. It's served late, but it's delicious.
3. Using a de-stress manual, your partner de-knots your back while you work out a plan B.
4. They order in a takeaway (and extra booze) so no one is the wiser.
5. They insist your guests are coming to see you and won't care about the food, which they say doesn't look that bad anyway (it does).

You get into a huge argument with your partner. What is it about?
1.
They cancelled plans with you to hang out with their own friends (and didn't invite you).
2. You asked them to do one job around the house, but it's been three days and they still haven't done it.
3. You book a hotel for a weekend of passion but your partner isn't in the mood to be intimate.
4. Your 40th birthday comes around and your partner doesn't buy you a present.
5. You have hangover paranoia and ask your partner if you made a fool of yourself the night before. They say you absolutely did.

You've been fired at work, how can your partner cheer you up?
1.
Run you a hot bath and listen while you vent your frustrations.
2. Take care of the bills and send your CV out to new employers without bothering you.
3. Hold you in a bear hug for 10 straight minutes.
4. Buy you a new diary and stationery set so you can start afresh at your next job.
5. Call and text you every day to make sure you're doing OK while unemployed.

What is your ideal birthday treat from your partner?
1.
Spending the morning having breakfast in bed together.
2. They've organised a day of activities and made a reservation at the restaurant where you first met.
3. Treated to a massage with essential oils, before enjoying a night of intimacy.
4. Receiving that expensive necklace you saw three months ago in a jewellery shop.
5. Arriving home to a handwritten love note detailing why they love you.

YOUR RESULTS:
Mostly 1s:
your love language is quality time
Mostly 2s: your love language is acts of service
Mostly 3s: your love language is physical touch
Mostly 4s: your love language is receiving gifts
Mostly 5s: your love language is words of affirmation


My answers were 2, 4, 1, 5 and 2 respectively. So not "mostly" any of the above.
Ok, so if I have a cold a lot depends on how bad it is. I generally want to be left alone when I'm really sick. Most cold remedies leave me dead to the world anyhow. Except for feeding the dogs and cats, my "chores" just wouldn't get done, and I wouldn't care. If it is just sniffles and a mildly sore throat, number one sounds good.

I would never host a roast dinner like that. It would have been takeout pizza from the start.

Huge argument? None of those are worth arguing about. Number one might - but maybe not, depending on how it went down.

Probably the only thing that really starts an argument is when she doesn't take something I said I was going to do seriously. And when I actually do it, she's all "How could you do this without discussing it?" I'm like "I told about this a month ago! Why didn't you say anything?" And she's like, "How would I know you really meant it?" Argument ensues. I hate not being taken seriously.

Fired from work? I hate doing resumes and cover letters. I HATE IT! Number 2 is the only option that makes sense. It's something she'd never do because she hates it too.

Ideal birthday treat would be a long solo hike in the wilderness. Or maybe a camping trip.
 
You've got a cold. How can your partner show their support?
By leaving me alone until I feel better.
You're hosting a roast dinner for all your friends and family. Minutes before you arrive you realise you've burnt the chicken. Now what?
Wouldn't happen because I never cook. So it's the same as always: Eat what's there, or call some delivery.
You get into a huge argument with your partner. What is it about?
If the partner told me a lie.
You've been fired at work, how can your partner cheer you u
Invite me to go out and have fun.
What is your ideal birthday treat from your partner?
Birthdays are overrated, and my partner would know better than to expect anything apart from a "happy birthday" from me. I would help with the preparations for a party of the partner wished to throw one, though.
 

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