What's your excuse?

[Reedstorm17]

Because my cat wanted to play with them.

Why did I forgot about the essay I have due tomorrow?

 

[Buzzerfly]

I missed your tofu spring rolls. Was pretty bummed so I bought your bubbles. They're soapy.

Why didn't you cook my lunch.

 

[Buzzerfly]

Sorry Reedstorm17, you remembered but you thought writing the essay would cause your teacher harm, so you wanted to keep him/her safe by drinking a memory loss potion.

Why didn't you cook my lunch?

 

[Butterfly88]

Because it contained meat and I'm a vegetarian.

Why can't you read my mind?

 

[vangelis]

Because the print is too small

Why do you always play wrong notes on the piano?

 

[Reedstorm17]

Because everyone is against me taking songwriting.

Why doesn't my mom want me to take songwriting next school year?

 

[Butterfly88]

Because she'd rather you take creative writing.

Why is international postage so expensive?

 

[the_tortoise]

Not enough people send snail mail anymore.

Why have I stayed up so late?

 

[Reedstorm17]

You wanted to watch the Olympics... over and over again.

Why did Mr. Nation try to read the message on my sister's rose from her significant other?

 

[Tiar DVaughn]

Because he thinks your sister's hot.

What city are you in?

 

[Reedstorm17]

Meow city. Half an hour before his feeding time, the cat's meowing non-stop. He only meows when he wants food.

Why is everyone talking about prom all of a sudden, even though it's not for another three months?

 

[the_tortoise]

Nobody around you knows how to read a calendar.

Why do people think deliberately obnoxious advertising will win people over to their business?

 

[Joel's Hear]

It's a conspiracy by the world to wire everyone dumb; it doesn't care about anybody's business.

Why can't I grow extra heads and/or have a tail?

 

[the_tortoise]

You just need more practice.

Why can't I learn to speak orca?

 

[Butterfly88]

Because that would be KILLER and it's not your time to die.

Why didn't you remind me to help @Fridgemagnetman harvest his onions?

 

[the_tortoise]

Because I couldn't bear the guilt of knowing I had participated in the violent displacement and eventual demise of all of those innocent onions.

Why is life so beautifully and maddeningly complicated?

 

[Butterfly88]

Because God would be bored if it wasn't.

Who created God?

 

[the_tortoise]

Cosmic spiders.

Why can't I think of a good question?

 

[Butterfly88]

Because I already asked all the good questions.

Why didn't you ask a question about a tortoise?

 

[Reedstorm17]

All the tortoise questions have been used up.

Why is there still another 3 weeks and 1 day until Three Days Grace's new album?