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Featured The holidays are upon us, how do you handle the autistic burnout?

Discussion in 'General Autism Discussion' started by SimplyWandering, Sep 30, 2019.

  1. SimplyWandering

    SimplyWandering Well-Known Member

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    The holidays are upon us folks.

    Jewish Holidays start now

    Halloween later this month.

    followed by a bunch of others such as Thanksgiving for some, Christmas and New Years for others

    Muslims holidays in Sept and November

    So how do you handle the Autistic or Mental Burnout associated with :

    talking with friends and families
    eating around groups
    Being around others
    noise
    lights
    Smells
    Other things that you simply cannot control

    ?

    Remember avoidance isn’t always a fixer.
     
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  2. tducey

    tducey Well-Known Member

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    I go to my room by myself, it helps to spend time with yourself.
     
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  3. Fino

    Fino Alex V.I.P Member

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    I don't have a lot of that. One of the few differences between non-holiday times and holiday times is that during holiday times people ask, "What are your plans for *insert holiday*?" which means they worry less about what you're doing over weekends.

    But I LOVE lights of all kinds, therefore I LOVE Christmas of all kinds. :D

    I just wanted both to say "of all kinds" :eek:
     
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  4. Juliettaa

    Juliettaa Black Sheep. Society of One. V.I.P Member

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    I don't view my non-participation as avoidance; merely my right of choice.

    And my choice is that none of the things listed belong in my world :D
     
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  5. Isadoorian

    Isadoorian Well-Known Member V.I.P Member

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    I've experienced no burn out at all really...
     
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  6. SimplyWandering

    SimplyWandering Well-Known Member

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    I had to word that just right so I wouldn’t offend anyone... I know... I know... not very autistic of me :confused:

    Your way sounds much easier...
     
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  7. BraidedPony

    BraidedPony Enjoying life and glad to be alive! V.I.P Member

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    Avoidance works pretty good for me. I'm not trying to fix anything, just survive with my sanity intact, such as it is.
     
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  8. Autistamatic

    Autistamatic He's just this guy, you know? V.I.P Member

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    I don't avoid them, I just don't do them. I don't like the party scene so I don't go. Christmas is an intimate, private affair and I book a fortnight's holiday from work over the Christmas/new year period which saves me from.the hysteria and makes for a lovely private time.
    Jewish, Moslem & Hindu holidays (don't forget Diwali) are for Jews, Moslems & Hindus. We wouldn't do Christmas if it weren't so ingrained into secular culture.
    There's no Thanksgiving over here and Halloween is for kids.
    Easy peasy, lemon squeezy ;)
     
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  9. Progster

    Progster Gone sideways to the sun V.I.P Member

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    I don't so a lot of social stuff during the holidays (here the holidays aren't until Christmas and New Year), mostly stay at home. Don't have many, if any visitors. Sometimes at New Year my partner has a few friends over, and Christmas in the evening he goes to visit friends, and I stay at home because the person he goes to has 4 small kids in a small house and it's noisy and hard to handle. For me, avoidance is possible, I have a choice.

    Last year on Christmas day we went out onto a mountain trail and walked, there was snow when we got to the top and we enjoyed it.

    For me the biggest problem with holidays is the disruption and not being able to daily living things such as go to the supermarket or for bread or post office or whatever, many services are shut - there are many holidays, one after the other, and I long for things to be back to normal again.
     
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  10. Streetwise

    Streetwise very cautious contributor V.I.P Member

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    suffer
     
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  11. Mia

    Mia Well-Known Member V.I.P Member

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    :D It's worked for me for the last five years. Mind you much of my bio family is far away. And my parents and grandparents have all passed on. So, it's mainly siblings now.

    In the past, it's been helpful to me to go for long walks, I usually had my dog with me. So it was good excuse to get outside and have time to myself.

    Fixing things and helping with food preparation and working in my Mother's or sister's or relatives gardens, weeding, hoeing, harvesting.

    Reading in my childhood bedroom. Playing games where I didn't have to talk very much.
     
    Last edited: Sep 30, 2019
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  12. Tom

    Tom Well-Known Member V.I.P Member

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    I like the pretty lights. :D
     
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  13. Rectify

    Rectify Well-Known Member V.I.P Member

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    It seems we're an independent bunch :D I choose not to do most holidays that are part of Australian culture. I celebrate what I want to, though.
    @Fino, the lights are beautiful. I can be a bit grinchy about other christmas (and other holiday) stuff though. It's the materialistic side of it that makes me a grinch. Apparently.
     
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  14. Wolf Prince

    Wolf Prince My future job title.

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    Im the exception here. Well i dont really talk during Thanksgiving or Christmas at these get togethers. We use to have massive eatings. Hundreds of people all family. With food spread across three tables. Ever kind you could think of. Filled with Fast Food and Home cooked. Along with every soda drink imaginable. Also another table full of pies and cakes. Mostly home made. I looked forward to the food. Though the family was alright. So long as we left kind of fast.
     
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  15. Streetwise

    Streetwise very cautious contributor V.I.P Member

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    I don’t know what the holidays of hedonism are called?I know Saturnalia! if you truly wanted to celebrate the birth of Jesus it would be called Christmas today!and yesterday !and tomorrow ! he was born the feast of trumpets/Sukkot which can be September or October , you can have a Hanukkah tree in the middle of December if you’re an observant Christian or secular jew
     
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  16. Aspychata

    Aspychata Serenity waves, beachy vibes

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    Holidays remind me how little connection l have to my family. But my place of employment is lavishly decorated so l feel happy with their huge tree. But l also feel relief that l survived another year on planet earth, and nobody forced me to do something l didn't want to do. Like it's a celebration of independence, and l am just in time to usher the year out the window. Next year l hope to live in my own place, so l look foward to the new year.
     
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  17. SolarPoweredNightOwl

    SolarPoweredNightOwl Walking contradiction

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    When possible I work the holidays. If I'm not going to get any peace, I might as well make money (holiday pay if I'm lucky) and bank goodwill for when I need time off later.

    I also have a policy of refusing to shop any place that plays christmas music, and I try to avoid shopping at all in the week or so of that holiday. Santa Clauses, carolers, and other assorted nuisances I remove from premises wherever I have authority to do so--the carolers are well intentioned and I'm nice about it, but Santa's bell drives me insane, especially when he starts in November...
     
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  18. Tom

    Tom Well-Known Member V.I.P Member

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    The Holiday humbug is starting quite early this year. Not even October. I don't see why you don't just hire a hit man to take Santa down and be done with it.

    santa 2.jpg
     
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  19. SolarPoweredNightOwl

    SolarPoweredNightOwl Walking contradiction

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    I tried that once. Come to find out it was some random old man trying to make extra money at the mall. Poor guy. :(

    In all seriousness, sound is my main sensory issue, hence avoiding the carols and the incessant bell ringing. I avoid shopping the week of when possible due to the crowds and the atmosphere of stress at those times, and to make retail workers' lives a bit easier. I do have a severe hatred of the holiday season for reasons outside of ASD, but I don't think this is the place for that.
     
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  20. GadAbout

    GadAbout Well-Known Member

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    I set my expectations very low. My expectations of self, my expectations of others. When you expect little, it's hard to be disappointed. Oh, and I don't have much extended family; my daughter and son-in-law come over for an hour or two around (or on) Christmas and we exchange a very few gifts. Maybe we have some stollen or fruit cake on hand. They then go on to other relatives' affairs.
     
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