Stereotypes

[DogwoodTree]

I'm starting to think...that a lot of my feelings that I "don't fit in" have more to do with the stereotypes I have in my own head of what people should act like, rather than the reality of what real people actually want or need from me.

For example...I feel like I should be able to meet the expectations of the extreme super woman. Successful in everything I do, clean house all the time, great kids, great job, all the volunteer work...and when I don't come close to measuring up to that obviously impossible standard, I feel like I've failed to be as good as what most women are able to do.

But they're not doing all of that, either.

Sure, there are a lot of people caught in the same trap, thinking they need to live up to a stereotype, and maybe those are the only people I've taken my cues from so far. But the more I accept myself as a REAL person, with REAL limitations and REAL quirks, the more I realize I'm really not quite as different as I may have thought...not any more than most other people are, anyway.

There are definitely people I know who do seem to fit in that mold of the super woman...but really, not many. And there really aren't a lot of people I know who fit ANY stereotype I've tried to fit people into.

Anyway...seems like the more I let go of the stereotypes...the less I try to fit people into my boxes...then the less "strange" I seem to be. Or at least...the more strange everyone else seems to be, right along with me, lol.

 

[The Penguin]

I think another issue lots of people do is racial stereotypes. They assume someone in one culture always act that way and someone else in another culture acts this way. The thing is, not everyone might be that type of image that people assume. For people not knowing me being a penguin, I say penguin as I'm different than the norm, many people make the wrong assumptions about me.

 

[Cali Cat]

The superwoman doesn't exist even with those women who seem to have it all. When you look closely, something is always missing, even if it's just a personality. Most perfect people I know are highly uninteresting people. I believe imperfections create the personality. So, really, we're not so different. We just have different imperfections that make us unique.

 

[nightowl]

I realise now in hindsight, that I spent quite a few years trying to be that superwoman, until I crashed back in 2006, and I had to start all over again from scratch. Today I am more myself for the first time ever in my life. I have been able to accept myself with my flaws, and imperfections, which I rather call my own personality

 

[Randomperson]

Your superwoman example sounds like the soccor moms that use meth to keep their energy level up between work and their annoying kids needing to be driven around town daily to their 16 activities.

 

[AsheSkyler]

I'm not sure if I ever had a stereotype I held myself to. I know that I keep some variable stereotypes on people so I can have an easier chance predicting what they'll be like, but I don't even hold them to that perfectly.

 

[icesyckel]

Stereotypes are just "a widely held but fixed and oversimplified image or idea of a particular type of person or thing" (c/o Google). In other words, they are a proposition that something is largely true for a class of people or things while acknowledging that there are exceptions. So, a stereotype is only useful if the statement is accurate in the majority of cases. Even then, their utility is limited as pertaining to specific individuals due to the built-in presumption that there will be exceptions.

However, if you live in an area with significant gang activity, it is good to know the gang colors and demographics. KKK members stereotypically where outfits resembling bed sheets, but not all people wearing such garb are in fact part of the KKK. If you are black, live in the deep south US, and see a man wearing what appears to be a bed sheet, then unless it is Halloween you would probably be wise to avoid that person. Are all such persons in the KKK? Again, no - this person might have just escaped from an asylum or have been mugged and stole a sheet from someone's clothesline. Still, I'd avoid such a person.

My point is that there is some utility to stereotypes and generalizations, but that utility is inherently limited by the very nature of the concept.