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ND-ND marriage, anything I have not tried?

Why is it "too late" to set objectives if he knows I'm using this site? I'm not following that part.
Maybe ask him how he hears messages. Ask if l have something really important to me and it needs your awareness, how do l bring home to you? I have thought that l should sit down once a month and have a maintenance chat. Like what are any issues, and what's going great for both of you. Then the more passive quiet person will feel respected also. But don't hogtie the poor guy and read him a fifty page riot act. It's more like maybe one or two things and state some positive. This is just testing this idea and seeing if you two can commit to it. Then finish up a date nite or date day plan, fun, or dinner, walk on the beach, or something new. Since doing things together actually bond individuals together. Just an idea. I try to actively engage my friend's opinion always, and he can get passive at times, so l make an effort to pull him out.
 
@yogabanana

The "too late if he's here" comment came right after the link to OpSec (tactical security), which absolutely includes information security - among other things not telling your target your plans.

It's would be too late to hide (at least some of) what you're up to if he's already here, reading these posts.

A good general rule: don't share any information until you know it won't negatively influence what you're planning to do. Careful first, to avoid a "Pandora's box" situation, then risk assessment, then you manage the information flow as appropriately.

Hopefully, in the end it will turn out it wasn't necessary to be careful.
 
Gotcha. Thanks @Hypnalis
Withholding information strategically is very difficult for me. It doesn't match my values presumably. Not saying it's "wrong" but I value transparency and want transparency from others so I'm unsure if I have the internal wiring necessary to do that part.
 
Plan fast - it will make things easier :)

There's a general guideline for this:
Hope for the best, plan for the worst.

Options that are routine for informal partnerships with no children and no significant shared assets can be very complicated when all of those are reversed.
 

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