Manipulating a conversation

[Suzanne]

I thought I was seeing a psychiatrist the other day ( ended up being a pychologist). Anyway, I had made up my mind and still of the same frame of mind, to not go there in the hope of being officalised for having aspergers, since France is very backwards in this area and I have not the "tools" to keep up with a barriage of negativity and so, the best way is to not even go there. Instead, concentrate on social phobia ( I do not believe it is social anxiety and it was another aspie on here, who got me thinking on this. I do not feel anxious going out of my home; I feel FEAR, which equals phobia). With trepidation, because when ever I have an idea that would go very well for me, it always comes to nothing, but this, I do feel quietly confident, that I will get a diagnosis straight away.

So, I go into the room and in itself, it was very embarrassing, because the scene is set for one to be vunerable. I start talking and find myself basing my talk around having aspergers. To be fair, though, my husband did start the ball rolling, when he told her about my obsessions and said: can you believe she got obsessed with ebola?! And think, in fact, this could have "kick started" in my psychologial brain to further the conversation ie like almost "hinting" to her or "nudging" her mentally, to pick up on the clues. I was so frustrated, because that was not my intention, besides, those who would have to know I have aspergers, take me for being an aspie, just by my actions; so really, all I need it for is to confirm to myself and also to have more of a sort of grounding on here, for when ones who suspect they have aspergers, but want to confirm. How, in truth, can I confirm that is how aspergers is, if I am not actually official? So, I try to be honest in that regard, so as to not give false information out.

I am just disappointed that I worded my sentences in such a way as to prompt a reaction.

 

[Progster]

Instead, concentrate on social phobia ( I do not believe it is social anxiety and it was another aspie on here, who got me thinking on this. I do not feel anxious going out of my home; I feel FEAR, which equals phobia).

Social anxiety and social phobia are actually the same diagnosis - it was called social phobia in the DSMIII (I was diagnosed with this) and social anxiety in the DSM IV and 5.

How, in truth, can I confirm that is how aspergers is, if I am not actually official?

You can't really, it's tricky because it is subject to opinion - even people (including myself) who are diagnosed officially sometimes doubt their diagnosis. I often wish that there was some kind of definitive blood test or something with either a positive or negative outcome, a straight yes or no answer because I hate uncertainty!!!

Edit - I think that you are 'manipulating' the conversation because Asperger's has become a fixation or 'special interest' to you and perhaps you can't avoid thinking about it and talking about it - I found myself doing the same and I thought that it didn't show, but my mum told me that it did. If so, it's not really manipulation. This in itself is a classic symptom of Asperger's and should help to confirm your suspicions!

 

[Suzanne]

Social anxiety and social phobia are actually the same diagnosis - it was called social phobia in the DSMIII (I was diagnosed with this) and social anxiety in the DSM IV and 5.

You can't really, it's tricky because it is subject to opinion - even people (including myself) who are diagnosed officially sometimes doubt their diagnosis. I often wish that there was some kind of definitive blood test or something with either a positive or negative outcome, a straight yes or no answer because I hate uncertainty!!!

Edit - I think that you are 'manipulating' the conversation because Asperger's has become a fixation or 'special interest' to you and perhaps you can't avoid thinking about it and talking about it - I found myself doing the same and I thought that it didn't show, but my mum told me that it did. If so, it's not really manipulation. This in itself is a classic symptom of Asperger's and should help to confirm your suspicions!

Ahh but perhaps not to French professionals. But yes, it is true, that I match many of the critera for aspergers and also know a lot about it, but hey, I am not allowed to formally diagnose myself lol

 

[Suzanne]

Social anxiety and social phobia are actually the same diagnosis - it was called social phobia in the DSMIII (I was diagnosed with this) and social anxiety in the DSM IV and 5.

I honestlly do not get this, because I know the difference between anxiety and fear. I NEVER feel anxious if I have to go out on my own. It is always a gnoring fear of impending embarrassment.

Our bins are so close that I can see my home from there, but we live right next to a bar/tabac and only on a monday are they closed. I HATE going past when it is open, because mostly, people stand outside smoking and that gets my paranoia going big time.

Couldn't go this monday, due to weather and having to ask my husband, that when he returns home, can we go together?

I also wondered why I cannot put the shopping trolley back when we visit lidl, but can we we visit another shop and then it came to me. The other shop's car park, is dotted around with shelters to hold these trolleys, where the one at lidl is right by the main entrance and I am PETRIFIED of falling over or something.

For some bizarre reasons, doors are a nightmare to me. If I do not know which way they open, I will not open that door. I have to wait for another to and then, I am ok and yet, for goodness sake, it is only opening in or out, but the view times in my childhood I did it wrong, I was laughed at and perhaps that has manifested itself into a huge nightmare for me?

One thing, not as ashamed as I used to be.

 

[Progster]

I honestlly do not get this, because I know the difference between anxiety and fear. I NEVER feel anxious if I have to go out on my own. It is always a gnoring fear of impending embarrassment.

I agree that there is a difference between anxiety and phobia - for some reason they changed it but I don't know why.

Our bins are so close that I can see my home from there, but we live right next to a bar/tabac and only on a monday are they closed. I HATE going past when it is open, because mostly, people stand outside smoking and that gets my paranoia going big time.

I can relate to this, because my house is near a busy bus stop and I don't like going past that when there are lots of people waiting at it, especially teenagers when the schools close.

I also wondered why I cannot put the shopping trolley back when we visit lidl, but can we we visit another shop and then it came to me. The other shop's car park, is dotted around with shelters to hold these trolleys, where the one at lidl is right by the main entrance and I am PETRIFIED of falling over or something.

I get my partner to put the shopping trolley back, but for different reasons - I hate the noise it makes on the asphalt, and I find it hard to steer - shopping trolleys seem to have a mind of their own.

 

[Suzanne]

especially teenagers when the schools close.

I thought that becoming a "mature" woman, that it would not bother me anymore, but oh wow, quite the opposite. I guess, just because our bodies and age tells us that we are growing older, our minds say differently and why, I feel exactly the same.

 

[Beguiling Orbit]

I see anxiety and phobia as being on a spectrum, with phobia being on the far end and anxiety in the middle somewhere.

 

[OkRad]

That is the trouble with psych dx. Nothing objective. People have lived or died based on one flick of eye or tic. People were locked for decades in hellholes based on one word from a relative. It's no science. A human is too complex