Make a Spectrum Joke from....

[Butterfly88]

What do you call an Aspie sitting on a volcano?

Why would you even ask that question? That situation is very stupid and illogical.

 

[Reedstorm17]

(My older sibling made this up 11 years ago after our vacation to Disney World).

The night before leaving for Disney World, a young aspie has a nightmare.

The next day, he arrives at Disney World with his family. The person collecting his ticket smiles at him warmly and says...

"Welcome to Disney, where your dreams come true."

 

[Gritches]

So an Aspie walks down the street carrying his pet cat. He meets a stranger who liked the cat, but remarked that the cat was "pretty dirty".

So the Aspie says "sure, but he's even prettier clean."

 

[Fridgemagnetman]

What do you call an Aspie sitting on a volcano?

Why would you even ask that question? That situation is very stupid and illogical.

Hot

 

[Reedstorm17]

A five-year-old aspie starts kindergarten.

The teacher gives all the students an assignment: "Go home and find out what the first four letters of the alphabet are."

When he gets home, his mother is in the kitchen, mid-phone call.

"Mom, what's the first letter of the alphabet?" he asks.

Annoyed by the interruption, his mother tells him, "Shut up, I'm on the phone."

As his mother continues her phone call, the aspie finds his father in the other room watching football.

"Dad, what's the second letter of the alphabet?" he asks.

His father is too busy watching the game to notice him. As a touchdown is scored, he exclaims, "Yes!"

Satisfied, the aspie finds his brother in his room watching Batman. He asks for the third letter.

Not wanting to be bothered, his brother sings along with the theme: "Dun nuh nuh nuh nuh nuh Batman!"

Unsure who else to ask, the aspie wanders outside. As he reaches the end of the driveway, he notices the garbage man collecting the trash.

"What's the fourth letter of the alphabet?" The aspie calls out.

The garbage man just keeps singing a song to himself: "In the garbage, in the garbage, I live in the garbage."

The aspie goes back inside, finished with his assignment.

The next day at school, the teacher asks, "What is the first letter of the alphabet?"

Excited to share his new knowledge, the aspie calls out, "Shut up, I'm on the phone!"

Shocked, the teacher walks over to his desk and asks, "Do you want to go to the principal's office?"

Confused, but hoping to redeem himself by stating more letters, the aspie says, "Yes!"

The teacher marches him down to the office. As soon as she leaves, the principal turns to the aspie and demands, "Who do you think you are?"

The aspie is now frightened to the point where he has decided to just keep saying the letters he's learned.

"Duh nuh nuh nuh nuh nuh Batman!" he responds.

The principal sighs and reaches for his phone. "I'm calling your parents. Where do you live?"

"In the garbage, in the garbage, I live in the garbage."

The principal puts his head down and questions why he became an elementary school principal in the first place.

 

[tree]

ASD BF: I'm gonna get you a diamond for your birthday.
NT GF: Nothing would please me more.

So, he got her nothing.

 

[Butterfly88]

I saw this funny shirt on Etsy once. It said: I have Asperger's and I'm the smartest person in the room. Was that socially inappropriate?

 

[Progster]

A five-year-old aspie starts kindergarten.

The teacher gives all the students an assignment: "Go home and find out what the first four letters of the alphabet are."

When he gets home, his mother is in the kitchen, mid-phone call.

"Mom, what's the first letter of the alphabet?" he asks.

Annoyed by the interruption, his mother tells him, "Shut up, I'm on the phone."

As his mother continues her phone call, the aspie finds his father in the other room watching football.

"Dad, what's the second letter of the alphabet?" he asks.

His father is too busy watching the game to notice him. As a touchdown is scored, he exclaims, "Yes!"

Satisfied, the aspie finds his brother in his room watching Batman. He asks for the third letter.

Not wanting to be bothered, his brother sings along with the theme: "Dun nuh nuh nuh nuh nuh Batman!"

Unsure who else to ask, the aspie wanders outside. As he reaches the end of the driveway, he notices the garbage man collecting the trash.

"What's the fourth letter of the alphabet?" The aspie calls out.

The garbage man just keeps singing a song to himself: "In the garbage, in the garbage, I live in the garbage."

The aspie goes back inside, finished with his assignment.

The next day at school, the teacher asks, "What is the first letter of the alphabet?"

Excited to share his new knowledge, the aspie calls out, "Shut up, I'm on the phone!"

Shocked, the teacher walks over to his desk and asks, "Do you want to go to the principal's office?"

Confused, but hoping to redeem himself by stating more letters, the aspie says, "Yes!"

The teacher marches him down to the office. As soon as she leaves, the principal turns to the aspie and demands, "Who do you think you are?"

The aspie is now frightened to the point where he has decided to just keep saying the letters he's learned.

"Duh nuh nuh nuh nuh nuh Batman!" he responds.

The principal sighs and reaches for his phone. "I'm calling your parents. Where do you live?"

"In the garbage, in the garbage, I live in the garbage."

The principal puts his head down and questions why he became an elementary school principal in the first place.

But everyone knows what the first four letters of the alphabet are - T,H,E,A.