I feel somewhat apprehensive about posting this but perhaps there’s an explanation for this that I can’t see and *hopefully* this is a lot more understandable.
My grandmother died a few weeks ago, and I didn’t really feel anything. There was no emotional response; and today during her funeral, I didn’t feel anything either. I was more of an observer to the procession, and I guess that’s understandable as I’ve never been to a funeral before despite loosing grandparents.
With the previous grandparents deaths, I was too young to really process anything and whilst I understood the concept of death, it was just a weird understanding that someone who was once there was now, no longer there and there was a gap. I was also closer to them, than the grandmothers who has recently died, and perhaps this dissociation is due to a lack of connectivity yet surely I should feel somewhat sad that she died?
I am usually an emotional person, often too emotional at times. I cried and felt devastated and strong feelings of grief when my cat died. When I feel sad or evoked by strong emotions such as in a piece of music, film, show or game, I cry. And when I’m angry I can boil over into rage that I start to shake in fury.
I was not say close to her, and maybe that is the problem but I had a bond with the other grandparents and definitely with my cat. When my cat died I felt such strong grief that it overwhelmed me and I wasn’t really able to do much of anything due to the deep aching depression that followed.
I suppose what I’m asking or looking for is some clarity or of some kinship that someone else has experienced this and may have had similar responses.
My grandmother died a few weeks ago, and I didn’t really feel anything. There was no emotional response; and today during her funeral, I didn’t feel anything either. I was more of an observer to the procession, and I guess that’s understandable as I’ve never been to a funeral before despite loosing grandparents.
With the previous grandparents deaths, I was too young to really process anything and whilst I understood the concept of death, it was just a weird understanding that someone who was once there was now, no longer there and there was a gap. I was also closer to them, than the grandmothers who has recently died, and perhaps this dissociation is due to a lack of connectivity yet surely I should feel somewhat sad that she died?
I am usually an emotional person, often too emotional at times. I cried and felt devastated and strong feelings of grief when my cat died. When I feel sad or evoked by strong emotions such as in a piece of music, film, show or game, I cry. And when I’m angry I can boil over into rage that I start to shake in fury.
I was not say close to her, and maybe that is the problem but I had a bond with the other grandparents and definitely with my cat. When my cat died I felt such strong grief that it overwhelmed me and I wasn’t really able to do much of anything due to the deep aching depression that followed.
I suppose what I’m asking or looking for is some clarity or of some kinship that someone else has experienced this and may have had similar responses.