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I wonder if people notice autism?

I didn't know about the autism until a couple years ago, but I always felt the same way. I knew I was different but couldn't understand how or why. I used to ask people how they seen me and would never get an answer. I know the people I would ask didn't want me to feel bad, so naturally would not tell me they thought I was weird or anything like that. One friend told me I was eclectic, but that's the most I ever got out of anyone. I did talk to a cousin and told her about the autism and she told me she just always thought I was weird is all. Why do we want to see how other people see us and why is it so hard?
Wait - maybe we are actually wanting to know if our masking is doing the job?
 
When my wife shared my diagnosis with her family, they said, "That explains a lot." I should add, this wasn't said judgementally - more like an 'aha'. They're all very loving and supportive.

But, yeah, they noticed. They just didn't have the training to pin down a cause.
 
As far as they are concerned, autistic = rainman

I've gotten that exact comment before. I told a good friend and coworker about my diagnosis and he said, "I remember when I met you, I told my wife, 'There's this guy at work that can do math like Rainman!' "

It's hard to break the stereotypes when I fit one of them. The last person I talked to about it, I found myself saying, "But not all autistics are like this." ...like they haven't even said anything about it, and I'm already putting up my don't-believe-the-stereotypes defenses.
 
No. I think people mostly think I'm just socially awkward, dreamy, chaotic, quiet and clumsy. Sometimes shy. But never autistic.
 
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Most people will notice. Unless they are autism cognizant, they will simply regard you as weird, mentally challenged, or a flake. A few people (who had autistic children) said I was "on the spectrum." Everyone else failed to recognize it, including therapists and psychiatrists. Everyone else just thought I was some weird guy.
 
I thought I don’t appear as obvious to those around me since I believe that I am not the stereotype of autism but I was proven wrong,my husband picked up on it way before I even knew but didn’t say anything until I found out from a psychologist and there is also a friend of my husband who apparently picked up on it aswell,also my husband says his mother knew aswell and my husband has told me that autism is written all over me but I was oblivious to this and thought that no one would really be able to tell.
 
Yes they do notice things, based on personal experience. But as most are saying, autism won't cross many people's minds. Not even therapists were able to pick up on it over the years. Honestly anyone who holds less than a PhD or PsyD is unlikely to diagnose it in adults. I basically figured it out myself and then it was affirmed.

Things others will spot - social awkwardness (I've had people tell me I'm awkward, which sucks), restricted emotional display, nervousness, repetitive or scripted behavior, and lack of eye contact. They will see these each in and of itself and won't connect the dots because either they don't know specifics about autism (most people) or they think something else is going on. People will always interpret things within their own knowledge base.
 
I don't think the general population know how autism can express itself in all its various ways. If anything people tend to pick up on slight weirdness. I know people tend to find me shy, aloof and a bit weird. The weird could be put down to me being a European too as I have slightly different mannerisms and ways of talking. I'm very calm and don't show much emotion.

People generally react fine, but tend to keep away without getting too friendly after the initial conversation or two. A few get in my face, invade my personal space and are like "YOU DON'T TALK MUCH DO YOU". ... Yes, stranger, your observational skills are on point.

My eye contact has got a lot better after working on it for a number of years, but I distinctly remember when I was younger (11-14) my step-aunt thought I was always being rude and "rolling my eyes" because I couldn't look at her. So while I've worked on things that people have told me to be off putting, there's always something that they tend to pick up on.
 
I do. I’m not sure though. The actions of some people would suggest that they don’t know based on their description of me.

I think most people just think i’m reserved and unapproachable.

Here’s a video of me. Is it obvious?
 
Now that I've been diagnosed and exploring my own Aspieness, I have met several people! If they are friends, I share, if they are not, I just roll with it.

I believe, especially when it comes to women, that there are maybe TWICE as many of us out there than anyone has a CLUE about.

People who struggle the most will be noticed the most. Early descriptions of autism were entirely skewed towards people who had serious developmental gaps that caused obvious problems. THIS was "autism."

With this new view, I believe a lot of what gets tagged as "autism" actually isn't. I don't think depression and anxiety are inescapable co-morbidities; they are caused by society treating us so badly.

What about the other end of the Spectrum? People like me, who walked and talked on time, was good in school, preferred reading to sports and was a girl who didn't care about gossip and fashion? It wasn't until the 1980's that anyone even recognized there was such a thing as Asperger's, and even THEN it was ONLY in boys.
 
Growing up as a middle child in a big family no one really noticed ...since I was so well-behaved (preferred reading books and not talking to people) I was kind of forgotten. I had a few 'quirks' but since any given person in the family does odd things it was passed by.

When I did get a job it was at a small business with a lax atmosphere, and they figured out that I liked working by myself and I was good with inventory, organization, and computers. They put me in a position where I don't have to interact with customers, and in coworker interactions they get a kick out of my 'snappy comebacks' and 'dry humor', which is more often than not me being honest and people thinking I'm hilarious.

No one's ever mentioned the possibility of me having autism (I was diagnosed after starting work there and decided not to tell anybody), but people will occasionally bring it up as a topic of conversation and it's weird. A couple guys discussed the main character in The Accountant and started theorizing about autism; one guy talked to me about someone he knew, explaining a certain behavioral trait with 'he's autistic'.

I think if I introduced the idea there would be some who would go 'huh, that does explain a lot' (like most members of my family) and then carry on as normal, there would be some who would be overly nosy, and some who wouldn't know quite what to do and end up treating me like unidentified hazardous material. Which is why I'm not planning on saying anything about it.

It kinda makes me feel like a spy in the world of neurotypicals. If things go a little too off the rails I bring up some point of research or say something like 'maybe they think [x]', but it can be interesting to hear how neurotypicals try to reason out autistic behavior, especially when the prevailing notion is that mostly guys have it. With me, they seem to have come to the conclusion that I'm quirky because I'm from a big family and I didn't watch TV growing up.
 
I do. I’m not sure though. The actions of some people would suggest that they don’t know based on their description of me.

I think most people just think i’m reserved and unapproachable.

Here’s a video of me. Is it obvious?

I think you just seem nervous!
 
My husband is the only one who calls me weird.

It is me, who feels that I am different and that is because of how people talk to me, which is different to how they talk to others, but I am sure that if asked, they would be surprised to find that is the case.

I am seeing an expert in autism and after having asked me many questions and him writing it down, his conclusion is that it most certainly does appear that I have autism, but despite that, he is getting me to do more tests, so that tells me that I seem "normal" to him and it is only how I respond and my husband's imput, that tells him of underlining issues.

I personally would rather it was not like that. It leaves me feeling disconcerted.
 
My husband is the only one who calls me weird.

It is me, who feels that I am different and that is because of how people talk to me, which is different to how they talk to others, but I am sure that if asked, they would be surprised to find that is the case.

I am seeing an expert in autism and after having asked me many questions and him writing it down, his conclusion is that it most certainly does appear that I have autism, but despite that, he is getting me to do more tests, so that tells me that I seem "normal" to him and it is only how I respond and my husband's imput, that tells him of underlining issues.

I personally would rather it was not like that. It leaves me feeling disconcerted.
remember women always have to fight
 

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