I think most people are secretly bisexual

[jacinto]

"Not to mention that a whole lot of “straight men” find the whole girl on girl lesbian” sex fantasy hot. So the myth is continually perpetrated."

To be honest, I know a lot of straight women (myself included) who enjoy man-man action just as much! I could never find straight porn I liked when I was growing up, since most of it was designed for men to watch, so I grew up swapping gay magazines with a couple of other girls instead! I still struggle to find normal 'vanilla' straight porn where the women don't act and look like ridiculous submissive Barbie dolls!

"Eventually I realized what was motivating me to do these whore-ific things had no root in homosexuality at all - I'd been around gay men enough to know I did not think like them. I did these things because they were to my mind the most humiliating, shameful, and degrading thing I could imagine and that turned me on. I didn't want to be with men, but I needed to in order to hurt myself psychologically. I guess it's a form of masochism maybe."

You could just find a domme who's happy to use strap ons and do all of that stuff. Or do you get more out of the humiliation side if a man is involved specifically because you're not attracted to him?

Sorry, I didn't see this until now.

Thank you for the suggestion. I've been fascinated by the Femdom thing for a long time actually. I think it's beautiful, romantic even sometimes.

In life I definitely target women I percieve as dominant. And then in relationships I try to encourage any such tendencies as much as I can.

But these aren't "dominatrices." Almost none of this finds its way into our sex life unfortunately. Me having to work within HFA-related constraints doesn't help, I'm terrible at this kind of thing. For the most part I've just settled for vanilla sex.

These girls are not into the kind of thing we're talking about. And if I made some effort to get them into it they'd only be accommodating my own wishes.

Strap-ons wouldn't be a part of any Domme/sub scenario I was involved in where my own preference was a consideration. If it was important to her I'd do it, but I think most of the time when one of these Dommes uses one on a guy it's because that's what HE wants. IDK though, I haven't made the effort to plug into the scene that's necessary to bring about experiences of my own.

Oh, and I know exactly what you mean about the porn actresses. They almost never do or say any of the kinds of things I'm hoping they will.

 

[Tom]

Be sure to let us know when you publish your research for peer review on PLOS.

 

[Iamnotbroken]

Bisexual ~<3

 

[Sid Delicious]

"In life I definitely target women I percieve as dominant. And then in relationships I try to encourage any such tendencies as much as I can. But these aren't "dominatrices." Almost none of this finds its way into our sex life unfortunately. Me having to work within HFA-related constraints doesn't help, I'm terrible at this kind of thing. For the most part I've just settled for vanilla sex. These girls are not into the kind of thing we're talking about. And if I made some effort to get them into it they'd only be accommodating my own wishes."

I would advise against chasing women that act dominant in public if you want that in a relationship. In my experience, most women who are dominant in the bedroom tend not to seem all that dominant in real life. The women I've met (including myself) who fall into the 'naturally dominant' group are generally pretty laid back, nerdy or even quiet in real life. The more dominant I get to be in a relationship, the more chilled out and reserved I tend to be at work or elsewhere as I get to play out that side of myself at home. I doubt anyone would guess what I'm like behind closed doors just by meeting me in public. In fact, I tend to attract the wrong sort of men because they assume I'm a 'cute, submissive, wifey' type and are then disappointed to find out I'm not. On the other hand, the women I know who are very gregarious, socially dominant, seemingly assertive types all prefer to play the submissive role at home. I would suggest just being up front when you meet someone and asking what (if any) role they prefer to take on at home if that's something that's important to you.

 

[GrownupGirl]

I guess that means people can't be asexual. But I'm pretty positive that I am.

 

[Lemongrab]

I had a gay moment yesterday, the last one before that was 3 years ago. I didn't do anything I just thought something and felt a bit strange!

 

[aspieoutlaw89]

Only a little bit bisexual. I can find other men sexually attractive, but I probably won't seek a relationship or sexual relations with them. I will fantasize about it, though.

i'm a lot bisexual.i probably won't seek a sexual relationship with them either,especially when they make me so sexually tense,i would pounce on them like a wild animal in the jungle .

 

[SusanLR]

Sexual reactions are strange for me.
I've had many flirtations from both men and women, some proposals for marriage
from both sexes and some just right out laying it on the line what they wanted- sex.

I'm fine with that.
I consider myself asexual as I don't get aroused or want anything more than
cuddles or playful touching and flirting.
I enjoy this from either sex and thinking back over a lifetime, I would say there
have been more incidents of this nature from same sex or bisexuals.

 

[Captain Jigglypuff]

I’m definitely gay. I have no attraction towards women at all. If you showed me a photo with a woman in a bikini next to a guy in a tiny Speedo, I’ll be staring at the guy and not even notice the woman.

 

[Luca]

I'm asexual, so I'm not *sexually* attracted to anyone. I find certain people aesthetically pleasing but I'm more attracted to outstanding personalities.

I've always tried to convince myself that I'm 100% straight, but that was when I was thinking about dating within the stereotypical sense... but as far as emotional connections go, then yeah, I'm probably bi or maybe even more invested in girls. I've learned that my preferences for emotional bonding and companionship are more fluid and definitely not only hetero. Women are also sometimes really adorable and cuddly, most men are not "adorable" and a lot of men think cuddling is foreplay. Lol

 

[Richelle-H]

I find this discussion interesting but I have never found sex of much interest. I say that in all candor. Up close and personal was always filled with a touch of anxiety, which is not the best feeling for.... well you know. I was always a bit duplicitous afterwards if there was any conversation. I did not wish to hurt anyone's feelings, so I stretched the truth to it's absolute breaking point to avoid any awkward or unexpected reactions. Which is why all my sexual activity took place over a short span of about 10 years. So not everyone fits in a neat and tidy little box. I was not particularly adventuresome or curious and was quite happy to put it all away, for I have always been happy with my own company.