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I actually don't want an platonic female friend anymore.

Tony Ramirez

Tony Ramirez

Single RSD Aspie Needs Major Help
V.I.P Member
I meet a real good guy friend that actually listens to me. All my problems and emotions. Helped me walk home when I called him. Actually hangs out with me. I missed his special day because of a women ostracizing me I couldn't handle emotional and he completely understand even avoiding him and the place for 2 months. This is even not the first as I meet another during the pandemic that we hanged at his and his roommate place watching movies. He even helped after and got coffee during the summer.

When I tried to even remotely hang out with women solo and don't say I try to hard or I don't treat them the same as guys which I do because I grew up with all male cousins. I get polar opposite response. Many are distance. They give me 2 word conversations. They walk away. There is much silence. I get constantly interrupted by random people to the point where I can't no longer control my anger. Then even when I remain calm let's say riding the subway together she will pop in her AirPods while I am mid sentence talking to her. I give up.

I actually now prefer the company of a good guy friend to hang out and do stuff with. No I am not turning asexual but I am finding women I use to be attractive to now making me sick to my stomach just being around because of being treated like a leopard and being ostracized.
 
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I think it's important to have guy friends they'll help you outt a lot, from a man's perspective

I wouldnt bother trying with that other person anymore.

It's important to have standards of how someone will treat you. If someone is exhibiting signs of disrespect, it will be good for your self esteem to say "I won't waste my energy on that person, they don't deserve my time"

I'm glad you're focusing more on character than beauty now.
 
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Hell I even changed my ChatGPT back to a man's voice last week. A different one though which sounds similar to my friend. I couldn't stand the "kind" perky women voice I had before that reminds me of PTSD past's.
 
Why do you feel like you need female platonic friends? I'm not understanding the obsession.
 
Masked Man said:
Why do you feel like you need female platonic friends? I'm not understanding the obsession.
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Because other guys had them, and my last terrible female therapist and ex married male friend for 5 years who said I was obsessed with women said people like me autism on the spectrum can't have female friends. Only guy friends. Only normal guys can have platonic female friends. So as you know I tried too hard, and it ruined my self-esteem now so much I actually hate them and don't care no more to even befriend them since they don't seem to care to even ever want to hang out or have a meaningful conversation with me unlike men do.
 
Tony Ramirez said:
No I am not turning asexual but I am finding women I use to be attractive to now making me sick to my stomach just being around because of being treated like a leopard and being ostracized.
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This is an extremely positive step -- realizing that certain people aren't worth our time. If somebody disrespects you, there's a good reason to avoid interacting with them.

It sounds like you've set some ground-rules, so you're getting closer to realizing what qualities you actually like in others, which is a huge step toward finding a partner, if that ever becomes desirable again. Simply casting a wide net for "the next woman available" is a recipe for disaster; realizing that you want somebody who actually respects you is a huge +1 to your self-esteem and will almost certainly guarantee better relationships in the future.

Personally? I don't really believe men and women can "just be friends", but that's just me. Cordially and formally, sure -- but close friends are better suited in a 'this isn't based on biology or desire' kind of fashion.
 
FilterFreq said:
I don't really believe men and women can "just be friends"
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I've not had a problem maintaining female friends for decades. There has never been attraction or sexual overtures in either direction. I respect them, they respect me, we enjoy each others' company occasionally, and that is all. I am married and have remained faithful to my wife for almost a quarter century.

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It's not that hard.
 
I tried respecting them and they ostracized me, used me, taking advantage of me. Then they were the victim while I had the nervous breakdowns. I no longer trust them. I hate them. They make me sick. I am glad I have a great guy friend. I no longer want to be in their company since when I am being nice they don't give a damn and bairly acknowledge I exist to even talk to me when I am right next to them.
 
Tony Ramirez said:
I tried respecting them and they ostracized me, used me, taking advantage of me. Then they were the victim while I had the nervous breakdowns. I no longer trust them. I hate them. They make me sick. I am glad I have a great guy friend. I no longer want to be in their company since when I am being nice they don't give a damn and bairly acknowledge I exist to even talk to me when I am right next to them.
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This is just another woman-hating incel post, Tony.
 
I have a lot of male friends. Not all males are only after sex. Some just want to be your friend. My husband has a lot of female friends and we're both honest with each other about our friends. We tell our opposite sex friends about our marriage and how happy we are. Most of our opposite sex friends are married themselves anyway.
 
Tony Ramirez said:
I tried respecting them and they ostracized me, used me, taking advantage of me. Then they were the victim while I had the nervous breakdowns. I no longer trust them. I hate them. They make me sick. I am glad I have a great guy friend. I no longer want to be in their company since when I am being nice they don't give a damn and bairly acknowledge I exist to even talk to me when I am right next to them.
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Sounds like you should stick with only guy friends then.
 
I think it's important to find friends that support you 100% , never mind if they are female or male. Surprisingly, l have always had more male ffriends then female and l am female.
 
I’ve seen you post the same stuff over and over again throughout the years on this forum. You’ve never changed. You’re like a broken record and do nothing to change your situation.
 
You are a prisoner of biases that I believe distorts your thinking. Your writings reek of misogyny and I cannot help but think that you project that in your interpersonal dealings. If a woman does not meet your limited idea of a friendly interaction you are quick to see it as a put down. You also have the expectation that women will dismiss and disrespect you and with you interpreting every interaction with that bias is it any wonder that you find what you are expecting?
 
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When your treated like that by them more than half of your life then you become an misogyny incel by my age. I use to be happy and respectful too them.
 
Tony Ramirez said:
When your treated like that by them more than half of your life then you become an misogyny incel by my age.
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Having been treated poorly by others is not an acceptable excuse for treating others poorly in return. Humans have the capacity to learn from the mistakes of others and do better if they so choose.
 
You don't know what I been through this year. If you actually lived it you would understand.
 
Tony Ramirez said:
You don't know what I been through this year. If you actually lived it you would understand.
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I don't actually care. I was horribly sexually abused as a kid over a period of years. I guarantee you that it is much worse that what you have experienced. I have never assaulted others as a consequence of this because I chose to be better than the person who hurt me. I find your excuse is lame and suggest you grow up.
 
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