How to Explain Aspergers to Friends

[CassieR]

As hard as I try, my friends don't really get what Aspergers is. I've had it for years now and I don't really get what it is. But, that's besides the point. My friends are super confused on how different I am because of Aspergers. So how in the world can I tell them?

 

[Nitro]

First off,you were born this way,wired differently than most, so many will not understand that part.
You can try to explain it the best way you can,but it will most likely fall on deaf ears and add to the confusion you are already experiencing.

If you are not being disruptive or harsh to others,I feel you owe no explanation to them,but try to fit in the best you can.

Try to not use it as an excuse to be odd,but embrace the good parts as gifts and be the person you want to be,not what others expect of you.

Being in the autistic spectrum is only a developmental disorder that made you different,not a freak.

I hope I gave you something you can put to use and not added to your plight.

Smile knowing you are different...that alone makes you special

 

[penguinclaw]

That is a really good answer and I will try to remember that myself

 

[paloftoon]

I would recommend a written document if it's a person close to you who is willing to listen. If not, I would suggest consider pictures and metaphors and specific examples as if you get too long winded, people won't get your point no matter how good your explanations are.

 

[Andrew206]

I've been on the spectrum for 27 years. I used to get teased for not wanting to socialize. But over time it has gotten easier to explain to friends. There's more knowledge now about Aspergers than there was many years ago.

 

[Effy]

Did they ever watch "Kyle XY"?

 

[Turk]

I tell my friends, that I'm the DVD player, that they bought off eBay, that came with instructions written in Zulu.

 

[aj]

I read something that willow hope created. She had the idea of designing a card which explains a little about autism. You can use it to show your friends, colleges, police, teachers ect.. You can use it to show the people who ask about it or in a situation where you can show someone if you cannot explain it. Its hard for me to explain it well and i hope this helps. (Now the worst part /).(\ upload)

 

[Wintertime]

I read something that willow hope created. She had the idea of designing a card which explains a little about autism. You can use it to show your friends, colleges, police, teachers ect.. You can use it to show the people who ask about it or in a situation where you can show someone if you cannot explain it. Its hard for me to explain it well and i hope this helps. (Now the worst part /).(\ upload)

Would this be what you reference? I found them in my travels and saved them to my hard drive as I archive things pertaining to my interests.

 

[Grumpy Cat]

This is a great thread!

 

[King_Oni]

I tell my friends, that I'm the DVD player, that they bought off eBay, that came with instructions written in Zulu.

In addition you can also blame others... for not wanting to learn Zulu

 

[aj]

Would this be what you reference? I found them in my travels and saved them to my hard drive as I archive things pertaining to my interests.

No thats not it, its the size of a credit card so it can be place either in your pers/wallet. Or you can place it in a card slip which can be placed around your neck sorry im tired and hard to explain it /).(\

 

[Wintertime]

No thats not it, its the size of a credit card so it can be place either in your pers/wallet. Or you can place it in a card slip which can be placed around your neck sorry im tired and hard to explain it /).(\

Ah, I see. Well that's ok anyway, perhaps the one I posted might help someone else. No need to apologise

 

[aj]

Ah, I see. Well that's ok anyway, perhaps the one I posted might help someone else. No need to apologise

Yeah i agree yours can help too

 

[Jambo_nick]

As hard as I try, my friends don't really get what Aspergers is. I've had it for years now and I don't really get what it is. But, that's besides the point. My friends are super confused on how different I am because of Aspergers. So how in the world can I tell them?

Aspergers for me is a combination of a few things! It makes you much more sensitive to emotion! (Strong emotion is hard to control) It's the ability to act with zero thought whatsoever. Can make you a great logical thinker and problem solver which are paramount to stamping out the downsides. The bottom line is you need to understand yourself before you can explain yourself to others. Try to figure out the reasons why you feel like you do sometimes. You'll be surprised what you learn about yourself.

 

[May Black]

In addition you can also blame others... for not wanting to learn Zulu

I'm a language freak, but Zulu is damn hard!

 

[The Penguin]

I just shared the same resources I read online. I don't know if she ever read it but sharing this info never effected the friendship.

 

[JamesBond]

My son is the Aspie and the couple of friends he does have that he did tell, luckily went to Uni to study psychology. So they accept his quirky ways, are happy to just sit with limited conversation at times if they visit, but basically have just accepted him as he is. They love all the good things about him, loyalty, manners, thoughfullness. That makes up for him not joining in events, needing a lot of warning of a visit etc.
Because their visits are only short and not that frequent for him it is very special that they still take the time to keep in touch now they have moved away.
I agree that it's easiest to just tell people you are wired different than most, so you see the word very different than most, and have a very different opinion on things than most because you view things literally and because of lack of empathy, that you have quirky ways which may make you seem eccentric but that it is your AS and you can't change any of it. That's if those things are a part of your syndrome because not every Aspie experiences the same conditions or level of condition. Those that value you as a friend will at least try to understand. Those that couldn't be bothered to try aren't real friends.

 

[Suzanne]

I only discovered about 5 year's ago and only now, venturing to say something and just one friend is completely ok about it and asks me questions and because of this, I class her a true friend. My husband is still struggling, but I think, more and more, he is realising things and perhaps, one day soon, he will look it all up. Keeps promising, but things get in the way. However, meanwhile, he gets frustrated with me and so, I have many melt downs, because it is embarrassing to say that I am like that, because of this!

True friends will want to find out and so, give them information on Asperger's and then, discuss it. I do get what you mean, though, so hard to even get our head around the issue!

 

[AsheSkyler]

I keep thinking over a good truncated explanation. So far the best I've got is, "Imagine, for a moment, that a dog and bird both got stuck in a human's body. You get me! My vision, hearing, and scent is more sensitive than yours, even if I'm nearly blind as a bat, bright lights still hurt my eyes. I also get distracted by squirrels, laser pointers, and shiny things. I Can get so focused on doing something that I will walk right into a tree or fly into a window, and due to minor processing issues I may not see the window until it's too late. I am easily overwhelmed and flighty, so don't dump me in a crowd and expect me to be fine. It's easy to ruffle my feathers and I will growl at you, perhaps even bite or scratch. I'll probably love to play until I'm too old and arthritised to tussle." Still too long. But the dog/bird thing fits me pretty well.