• Welcome to Autism Forums, a friendly forum to discuss Aspergers Syndrome, Autism, High Functioning Autism and related conditions.

    Your voice is missing! You will need to register to get access to the following site features:
    • Reply to discussions and create your own threads.
    • Our modern chat room. No add-ons or extensions required, just login and start chatting!
    • Private Member only forums for more serious discussions that you may wish to not have guests or search engines access to.
    • Your very own blog. Write about anything you like on your own individual blog.

    We hope to see you as a part of our community soon! Please also check us out @ https://www.twitter.com/aspiescentral

How should girls approach autistic guys?

Status
Not open for further replies.
Well there's no denying the fact that the overwhelming majority of women that will approach a guy or ask a guy out are in the extreme minority women will normally never initiate a relationship with a guy no matter how much they like him or are attracted to him
 
Well there's no denying the fact that the overwhelming majority of women that will approach a guy or ask a guy out are in the extreme minority women will normally never initiate a relationship with a guy no matter how much they like him or are attracted to him

Would you care to provide a source / credible citation for this?
 
This stuff has been studied - the stats are in.
And there are tested Evolutionary Psychology explanations for it.

Since it's people, the explanations cannot be captured in a couple of sentences.
Since it's about mating strategies in a species in which females can hide their fertility status (quite unusual), the complexity is higher than e.g. dominance behaviors, which are just as stupid, but they're necessarily visible.

Some simple principles though:
* If you've reached adulthood (lets say 20) and you've never been approached by a woman in a public place, you probably never will be.. In that case you could literally wait your entire life and never meet a woman that way.
* Alcohol lowers people's social inhibitions. In countries that are awash with alcohol (e.g. US and UK), the rate of F->M approaches will go up in social spaces where alcohol is served. Note though: that doesn't increase the odds of rarely-approached males meeting someone by as much as you might expect.
* M/F mating games are always competitive. This is true regardless of whether you can see it or not.


There's a lot more to this. If you care, you should research it yourself.
 
Last edited:
Yeah if you're a woman love and sex will find you someday but if you're a guy it won't.

Another way to put it for women, men fall in their lap but for guys women do not fall in their lap
 
How should girls approach autistic guys?

• Promise no more than you are willing to deliver.
• Remember that many of us have been 'burned' by women in the past, and that we may be expecting it from you.
• Remember too that many of us perceive only the literal meanings of your words, without perceiving their intent.
• Respect their "personal space"; it may be larger than your own.
• Smile, sincerely.
• Speak softly, but audibly.
• Speak factually and truthfully -- say what you mean and mean what you say -- without criticism or judgment.
• Try to minimize sudden moves and grand gestures.

This should do for starters.
 
Interesting the last thing you would expect a woman to do
No, it is likely the last thing YOU would expect a woman to do.

Once I learned how to play musical instruments (flute, violin) and learned how to dance "Ballroom" style, women started inviting me to parties and receptions as their "Plus One" just so they would not end up sitting alone with nothing to do and no one to talk to. Dancing and playing music attracted a lot of attention form other women.

Being with a woman also attracted other women (i.e., "Ooo, Clare has a man! I should find out what he's like!").

To attract interest, be both attractive and interesting.
 
Yeah if you're a woman love and sex will find you someday but if you're a guy it won't.

Another way to put it for women, men fall in their lap but for guys women do not fall in their lap
Will you be sharing any of your other opinions on the forum or did you come here to perseverate on this one solitary thing? Lots of us share our opinions here, that’s okay, but we know that they are opinions and we have more than one.

Are you interested in changing this perseveration that you have to live a less resentful life?

Are you just looking for others who are equally enraged by this opinion? Are you trying to enrage others?

Will you ever delve into actual research that may describe certain unbalanced patterns in courtship?

It seems rather unhealthy and unhelpful to ruminate on this topic the way that you do. We are a help and support forum, so I offer my opinion in an effort to ultimately help you, not to criticize you. I cannot help but notice that the majority of your posts are about this one strong opinion that you have. There’s more to life than being enraged and angry that love and sex has not “fallen into your lap.”

You could talk about milkshakes…

You could talk about concerts…

You could share your thoughts on video games…
 
Trust me I know. Females don't approach guys in public places. Only in Church and only during greetings and even then most are already in relationships.
 
Yeah if you're a woman love and sex will find you someday but if you're a guy it won't.

Another way to put it for women, men fall in their lap but for guys women do not fall in their lap




From the National Sexual Violence Resource Center: Sexual Assault Statistics

Association of American Universities Report on Sexual Assault and Misconduct
 
@Rodafina

There's nothing in @Steelbookcollector217 that even hints at violence against women.

Re-worded with the same meaning, it just says that in the 2020's, it's easier for women to find romantic partners than for men.

Which is 100% true, and there are a lot of statistics (and books written by serious people) to back it up.

The worst criticism that post deserves is that there are two commas missing, ("someday, but") and ("lap, but").
:
:
A PS since this is "that kind of discussion": - there's nothing "defensive" or "insecure" about this post.
My life has been approximately NT-normal in terms of the statistics for someone my age, with nothing to feel any shame about in the past, and self-supporting adult children in my present.
 
Last edited:
Yeah if you're a woman love and sex will find you someday but if you're a guy it won't.

Another way to put it for women, men fall in their lap but for guys women do not fall in their lap

This is quite an ugly thing to say. How is your self-loathing going to attract people?

In another thread, you said you hate the phrase, "There's someone for everyone." If you don't believe there is someone for you, why complain? If you are made for a solitary life, nothing is lost. If you think some people are meant to be alone, then why complain of single life? Resentment is not an aphrodisiac.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.

New Threads

Top Bottom