How lonely and alone are you?

[DebzD21]

There are times where it's just me my video games, internet & I can be fine for days. There are times where I can talk to someone for hours.

I'm like this, sometimes I try to talk to a certain friend it makes me think he's ignoring me :/ since he reads the message but don't reply

 

[tridianprime]

I cant understand value in peoples company, other than sex, so being on forums is better as topics are more intellectually stimulating.

 

[Axeman52]

When I'm alone I don't really feel lonely - I feel like I'm in good company with my thoughts and my hobbies. A few familiar faces are OK but not entirely necessary.

I think I feel the most lonely when there are too many people around and I just can't cope with them all and I feel like I have to retreat into my own little quiet space for a while. If I'm alone because I feel like I had no choice but to run away from an uncomfortable environment, that's when I really feel lonely.

 

[Tarragon]

I'm alone even when with other people. Lonely? No, as the world is full of amazing animals. Of course, I don't count humans amongst them. They are Animals, yes, but not interesting or worth bothering with most of the time!

 

[joshuaturbeville]

I think I grow alone and lonely because I disconnected myself from the world. I like this loneliness but most of the time I hate it. I want to go out more often with friends but their all on their own, some are married.

 

[tridianprime]

What does a relationship bring to an aspies life if that aspie likes to be alone and is generally considered unpleasant?

It is a serious question. Is it worth me trying to find a friend or partner. Convince me! :2thumb:

 

[anne.bc]

Right now I feel extremely alone, much like how I felt a few years ago. If my friendship with this friend I keep talking about has ended, I feel like I will never find that again. This is the worst way to start a new year and it's a good thing I'm so depressed that I am eating less because one of the last things I need at this point is to gain back all the weight I just lost.

My fiancé made me soup last night lol

 

[Ereth]

*hugs*

Anne, I don't know what will happen between you and your friend, but you're bound to make more friends in life. You're a kind, intelligent, beautiful person with a loving fiancé---more people are going to notice.

A note: I know you're depressed, but please don't deprive yourself of meals. It's not healthy. And skipping meals will only slow down your metabolism, which will lead to weight gain, not loss.

 

[grapesicles]

*hugs*

Anne, I don't know what will happen between you and your friend, but you're bound to make more friends in life. You're a kind, intelligent, beautiful person with a loving fiancé---more people are going to notice.

A note: I know you're depressed, but please don't deprive yourself of meals. It's not healthy. And skipping meals will only slow down your metabolism, which will lead to weight gain, not loss.

Completely agree - you will no doubt have many wonderful friendships in future. Make sure you eat a small amount of food, even if you can't manage a whole meal. Sending hugs. < 3

 

[Ste11aeres]

What does a relationship bring to an aspies life if that aspie likes to be alone and is generally considered unpleasant?

It is a serious question. Is it worth me trying to find a friend or partner. Convince me! :2thumb:

If you find the right person, that person will convince you.

 

[tridianprime]

If you find the right person, that person will convince you.

That is a nice thought.

 

[MoCoffee]

How close do you feel to online friends? I find I can "talk" to my friends much more openly online than face to face, unless we are using Skype. Anytime facial cues are involved I feel awkward and unsure of myself. Online, I can take my time to think about what I want to say and I can proof read and correct it before I send it. I worry a lot about saying the wrong thing and missing cues when we are face to face. I know this isn't very satisfactory for my friends and they want to spend time with me, but I just can't handle to stress of "live" relationships except with a very few family members. I don't feel lonely, but it make me sad that my friends do.

 

[tridianprime]

How close do you feel to online friends? I find I can "talk" to my friends much more openly online than face to face, unless we are using Skype. Anytime facial cues are involved I feel awkward and unsure of myself. Online, I can take my time to think about what I want to say and I can proof read and correct it before I send it. I worry a lot about saying the wrong thing and missing cues when we are face to face. I know this isn't very satisfactory for my friends and they want to spend time with me, but I just can't handle to stress of "live" relationships except with a very few family members. I don't feel lonely, but it make me sad that my friends do.

I know what you mean and i too find it easier to open up. I also believe that it can open your eyes to new ideas, it is to me anyway, and it is a way to learn from people without all of the messy confusion that comes with offline socialisation.

 

[Biblio-Love]

When I'm alone I don't really feel lonely - I feel like I'm in good company with my thoughts and my hobbies. A few familiar faces are OK but not entirely necessary.

I think I feel the most lonely when there are too many people around and I just can't cope with them all and I feel like I have to retreat into my own little quiet space for a while. If I'm alone because I feel like I had no choice but to run away from an uncomfortable environment, that's when I really feel lonely.

Totally agree with this. Most of the time I feel just fine being alone, I prefer it actually. I like the quiet to work on my writing and graphic design. I hated when I had to work with other people. Too distracting! I get so much more done being self-employed. And when in social circumstances, I am fine for a limited amount of time. Otherwise, the constant chatter irritates me to no end. I feel most lonely when in a crowd. My husband and daughter are great, but no more. I hate when my daughter invites a friend over as it is just one more person in the house when makes me nervous and wound up. It is something that is important to her, so I deal with it, but my preference is to be by myself or to have just those 2 other people in the house. During the day I am by myself working so it only after 4 o'clock that first my daughter comes home from school and then later my husband from work. After she goes to bed, hubby and I watch netflix or whatever. So my social interactions are limited, which suits me fine.

 

[Aussieaspie91]

I am pretty lonely in general. When everyone else drinks and they talk each others comfortably I am sober and couldn't get into it.

Elsewhere in public and that I am struggling to make friends. Sometimes I thought I am making a new friend but always turn out not a friend because he or she not giving me contacts or so.

Since having no friends, it makes it extremely difficult to find a girlfriend too. I have zero experience for both scenarios.

 

[mdirks225]

Pretty damn lonely all the time.

I'm just recently realizing that I have autism in general..

 

[nowwhat]

I feel like I scare people because I'm too weird. I don't change for anyone but me, so I guess they are missing out. Too bad that some of my fraternity sisters aren't really warming up to me. We're supposed to be there for one another and very few of them are giving me the cold shoulder. It could have been worse then... Haha oh well, at least I still have my fiancé, my best friend, my band mates and coffee. ;D

And us! Most have shallow friends based on rote ritual, pherormone exchange and herd instinct. Our friends, though fewer, are REAL. Interestingly, many of my friends are...touched, altered, abby-normal, in some way as well, or have odd relatives and so can see past my social ineptness and inappropriateness, stims, tics, etc. It hurts to be rejected, but you can only be yourself and wait for those who, eventually, opt IN.

On a tangentially related note, a couple of my friends have HFA or Asperger's kids. One friend has a full blown paranoid schizophrenic father. I guess compared to that, I'm not that freaky.