How do aspies/auties feel about holidays like christmas?

[Chance]

I have no issues with people celebrating Christmas, or birthdays, or whatever...

I have issues when I am FORCED to do things I wouldn't EVER do otherwise...

I hate gifting and the competition it has caused. However I would just as soon buy something I want to give someone and give it to them ANY day of the year. Thats what I do, and there is no "pay back" or you owe me, or we have to do this or that...

I'm so freaking logic minded that things like "Christmas" and saying Jesus was born on that day, when he wasn't! It bothers me down super deep inside so I try to be caring, but the whole thing is fake. If we want to get real and celebrate it some time in the fall, and be honest that we don't know the exact day he was born and quit trying to play out this smoke and mirrors nightmare... I would be much more interested.

But to cloak Yahshua on top of a pagan festival, and make all these claims and turn it into a multibillion dollar industry of junk presents that end up in the spring garage sale, or in the trash... To hustle and twist through the crowds and sit down with a family that is usually fighting before lunch is served ...

Thats one main reason I try very hard to transfer out of here before the holidays... I might come home or I might just go sailing, or set on the pier and do nothing. THANKFUL I'm not mashed into the nightmare people have turned this into.

Thank you but no thank you, if I can possibly avoid it.

Chance + holidays = nervous wreck, angry grinch : )

 

[Kirsty]

If I were you, I'd book affordable accommodation now before it's too late as they go pretty fast for Christmas. I might do this, but I'm not sure what's happening yet regarding seeing friends again.

 

[Mia]

If I were you, I'd book affordable accommodation now

Already have Kirsty, looking forward to something entirely different.

 

[Kisa the tea]

Holidays are just another day for me. I don't celebrate any so I just kind of go on with my day as normal.

 

[fairy_girl]

Growing up I always enjoyed the gifts that I got and staying with family for a few days to celebrate it. It was slightly nerve wracking being surrounded with loud excited cousins and the constant flashings of cameras going off as I carefully opened my wrapping paper and saw what I got. The gifts were always special to me (except for the itchy sweaters) during those times. Easter I enjoyed because it was finding eggs that were in the backyard and it was quiet as everyone watched everyone find the eggs.

Now that I'm an adult, I just buy myself gifts that I want that I wait on.

My parents weren't that religious but we did used to go to church during Easter and it really kind of bored me. I do understand the meaning of both but I don't practice it at all. I have my own religion separate from my family and that's good.

 

[Mia]

Who would like that?!?! Sounds horrible to me.

It wasn't just terrible, it was also quite loving and kind. Relatives cooking and making gifts which I still treasure to this day. Music and singing, the smell of incense in church, homemade fudge and candy, knitted slippers, hot chocolate. Nothing is ever one thing.

 

[WereBear]

Nothing is ever one thing.

You are right. I treasure family Christmases that were like that... when I was a child.

This was also when I observed the adult women did all the work. I decided that would ruin it for me, and so that has never been a part of my own celebrations.

 

[Mia]

You are right. I treasure family Christmases that were like that... when I was a child.
This was also when I observed the adult women did all the work. I decided that would ruin it for me, and so that has never been a part of my own celebrations.

I think it was their gift to everyone. Rarely appreciated by people who accepted all that labour as usual. It was more about 'doing' that showed their love, rather than being able to just be. It's the women that I think of at those times, tired and giving who may have enjoyed what they created. Without them holidays would never have been the same.

It was my spouse who pointed out that so many of these preparations were not necessary. That I shouldn't do all these things, to recreate that time. That it was not as important as it had been. Now, it's become simple and more meaningful.

 

[Crossbreed]

If we want to get real and celebrate it some time in the fall, and be honest that we don't know the exact day he was born and quit trying to play out this smoke and mirrors nightmare... I would be much more interested.

I've seen a really good rationale about how His birthday might have been on the Feast of Tabernacles (Sukkot)...

 

[Chance]

I've seen a really good rationale about how His birthday might have been on the Feast of Tabernacles (Sukkot)...

Makes more sense than using it as a cover for winter solstice... If people would just be spiritually honest...
I would have no issue with it. If you want to do winter solstice have at it... Just be honest about it.

I'm a logical nightmare... + People don't hold a census in the dead of winter where people will die traveling. It also mentions harvests and taxes... None of this was something that would have benefited anyone in the winter in those days... The Inns were full because it was travel season and maybe it was The Feast of Tabernacles, plus the census, plus selling harvests and gathering winter supplies...

I'm way too passionate about this subject so I better just shut up and not further derail this post... : )

 

[AustinFrom1995]

I find Christmas to be too obnoxious, corporate and Sensory Hell. TBH its my least favorite holiday.

 

[Chance]

Well I was being a guy and found this on shear accident...
But I can do Christmas this way... It even has a Christmas classic playing for your enjoyment... : )

 

[isthisreallife]

I don't see the point in them. It's all very commercial. Christmas makes people act like they wouldn't normally act at any other time of the year. All of a sudden you feel goodwill towards that homeless man who's always on the corner that you normally wouldn't give a second glance towards. You're forced to spend time with family that you really would rather not, and waste exorbitant amounts of money that you don't have. For what purpose? It's not even logical. I don't need presents, I can save and buy myself something that I really want. I'm much happier not having to associate with people I don't want to. I treat people with dignity and respect all year round, I don't need a calendar to dictate to me when I should be kind to people. Honestly, I feel like I'm not from this planet, everything is backwards and counterproductive.

 

[xudo]

every year I still get gifts, even though I'm under orders not to buy for the rest of the Family except my Niece and Nephew.

My sister and I still get stockings You mentioning you niece and nephew has reminded me....we'll have two new ones this Christmas. Two of my sisters in law are pregnant, and they're due in November, within two weeks of each other! One is having a boy and the other a girl. The one having a girl already has a girl (8) and a step son (9)...so add two new babies and yeah...it's going to be loud at the in laws.

Everyone used to go to the in laws over Christmas and it was a great big family thing, which I actually enjoyed because it was so different to how my family had always celebrated. However, my parents in law like a drink (I wouldn't have said they're alcoholics...just drink too much socially and of an evening..) and it's just hard work. All the 'kids' feel the same and it's lead to everyone spending less time there generally and especially over Christmas.

 

[StephF]

Christmas is about children and family. As I have neither I don't do Xmas. No tree , no decorations, no big meal. Its just another day for me.

 

[Kirsty]

Everyone knows I love Christmas. If you don't know, then you do now.

I loved spending time with friends last year.

I have fond memories of my childhood being close with family at Christmas. There were birthdays during this time as well. One down, as my late Grandpa was born on Christmas Eve. I still say happy birthday to him even though he has been gone for about twelve years.

 

[Mr Allen]

My sister and I still get stockings You mentioning you niece and nephew has reminded me....we'll have two new ones this Christmas. Two of my sisters in law are pregnant, and they're due in November, within two weeks of each other! One is having a boy and the other a girl. The one having a girl already has a girl (8) and a step son (9)...so add two new babies and yeah...it's going to be loud at the in laws.

Everyone used to go to the in laws over Christmas and it was a great big family thing, which I actually enjoyed because it was so different to how my family had always celebrated. However, my parents in law like a drink (I wouldn't have said they're alcoholics...just drink too much socially and of an evening..) and it's just hard work. All the 'kids' feel the same and it's lead to everyone spending less time there generally and especially over Christmas.

Aw, if you get chance you'll have to post pics of the new kids, I love kids.

Sadly if I was ever destined to get any of my own, I'd have at least teenagers by now.

 

[xudo]

Aw, if you get chance you'll have to post pics of the new kids, I love kids.

Sadly if I was ever destined to get any of my own, I'd have at least teenagers by now.

I don't really like kids. Never wanted them either. I'm at a loss as to what to do or how to act/interact with kids under the age at which they can talk properly. People usually laugh when they see children trying to interact with me under that age, as I'm like "what do you want". I talk to all children in the exact same way as I would talk to an adult. Apparently that's not "normal" but I obviously don't know how to be any other way.

 

[xudo]

Recently I explained to a good friend that "kids are a mystery to me." His two youngest call me "uncle" and I love them dearly, but I really don't know how to interact with them on any level.

Most people say something like "oh you'll learn" and I'm like...no, I won't. People seem to expect women to just naturally be good with kids because we're all maternal beings whose goal in life is to have children of our own. Women like me who don't have a maternal bone in our bodies and actually don't want kids are seen as weird and selfish. I'm not too bad with our niece and nephew as they're like proper people now (they're 8 and 9) and I love them to bits. My husband has always been the favourite though, as he doesn't have the problems interacting with kids of any age that I do, and he treats them more like kids. I think that maybe when they get to that age where they're desperate to be treated like adults, they'll appreciate the way I interact with them more.

 

[Mr Allen]

I don't really like kids. Never wanted them either. I'm at a loss as to what to do or how to act/interact with kids under the age at which they can talk properly. People usually laugh when they see children trying to interact with me under that age, as I'm like "what do you want". I talk to all children in the exact same way as I would talk to an adult. Apparently that's not "normal" but I obviously don't know how to be any other way.

I'm the opposite, if I see a cute baby in public I'll coo at it and say hello, some Parents don't like that though.