Hi and welcome! I know Manchester well. (UK). You aren't alone now that you are here, for sure. Tons of us in the same boat. I'm similar to you maybe as one of the undiagnosed, now 64 and self diagnosed after plenty research. Think women were even more likely to go under the radar, and still are. But although it is quite defining in some ways, I also think of my experience of high autistic traits or Aspergers/ASD1 as you might think of say, getting news of having dyslexia late in life. It doesn't define me. Yet is such a useful key.
Like dyslexia, it was always there. As an academic, I have seen so many people who come to higher degree training later in life, when they know from their expertise at work that they really are not somehow "thick" like they were told or assummed at school in the 60s 70s 80s, and they have had or get a dyslexia assessment and finally understand they really never were 'unacademic', there's an explanation and they can have help if needed, while many also have some strategies by then, without even having known why they needed them. One lady told me she just always works twice as long and hard. What a star.
Like them, we who were missed in earlier times, who perhaps continue to be missed for diagnosis or help, still can have strategies, and actually finding out what the issue is, and how we can best strategise around our experience, is so helpful I think. ASD1 comes with a mix, many do feel they have some talents or abilities that balance the often difficult areas, of which social relating is often a very significant area that hampers many of us some extent. There's strategies and ideas we can learn and try.
Best wishes on your journey!
