Hi everyone ! I am introducing myself because i'm not sure if I have yet!
In a nutshell, I am a guy with (what I am almost positive is) undiagnosed Asperger's/HFA (the main challenge I deal with), as well as ADHD, social anxiety disorder, a small smattering of OCD, a specific learning disability, light/mild depression that comes and goes, and probably a few other things. Life is challenging, to say the least, so I figured I'd come here for support, sounding boards, and advice.
You may wonder how, if I'm undiagnosed as I say, that I would know I have Asperger's. Well, pretty much almost EVERY characteristic of someone with Aspergers or HFA that I have read, I can relate to. I was made fun of mercilessly in school, was always left out or last, was treated differently and even TOLD a time or two that I was different, was called many derogatory names, and thus, hated school with a passion. I am ultra-introverted, preferring to stay at home 95% of the time with my very boring interests, rather that socialize with ANYONE, even people I know well (of which there aren't many). I NEVER speak up in groups, due to my social anxiety, and worry about being contradicted, laughed at for saying something dumb, ignored or not heard, saying things that are non-sequitur (due to either not hearing the discussion due to my ADHD, or, misunderstanding due to the learning disability or Aspergers), and other things.
I have horrible anger and, if I didn't restrain myself, would constantly be telling people to F off or cussing them out, for them either ignoring me, or doing things that irritate me (of which there are many), or doing things that hurt me (which is extremely easy; I am quite thin-skinned, much to my annoyance). I could very easily end up beating people up, and ending up in jail and in a world of hurt and regret, without the restraint that i'm forced to use.
I am sensitive to certain physical stimuli, as is common in Asperger's, and I believe as a result of this, I have what's known as misophonia, which is a hatred of certain sounds that sends someone into instant anger upon hearing them.
I am always worried people think I'm a creep and a weirdo. I don't see anything that would allude to that, but I'm always paranoid about it, knowing that Asperger's people can seem creepy due to their "differentness". The fact that I'm a single guy, with no kids, probably tends to give people and even greater pause. I tend to hover over people while they are in a conversation, because I hate interrupting, but that seems to make people uncomfortable; sometimes I forego talking to people who are already in a conversation for that reason.
I could go on and on with all the details but, I dont want to bore anyone, and verbosity is another huge issue of mine (and not getting to the point or taking 20 rabbit trails trying to get to it), so I'm going to just pretty much end it by saying: I'm sick of living this way, suffice it to say. So I am joining this site and chatting with you all, to get tips and support. I hope that I can receive that from you but also assist and uplift all of you, also.
Thanks so much everyone. Hugs!
In a nutshell, I am a guy with (what I am almost positive is) undiagnosed Asperger's/HFA (the main challenge I deal with), as well as ADHD, social anxiety disorder, a small smattering of OCD, a specific learning disability, light/mild depression that comes and goes, and probably a few other things. Life is challenging, to say the least, so I figured I'd come here for support, sounding boards, and advice.
You may wonder how, if I'm undiagnosed as I say, that I would know I have Asperger's. Well, pretty much almost EVERY characteristic of someone with Aspergers or HFA that I have read, I can relate to. I was made fun of mercilessly in school, was always left out or last, was treated differently and even TOLD a time or two that I was different, was called many derogatory names, and thus, hated school with a passion. I am ultra-introverted, preferring to stay at home 95% of the time with my very boring interests, rather that socialize with ANYONE, even people I know well (of which there aren't many). I NEVER speak up in groups, due to my social anxiety, and worry about being contradicted, laughed at for saying something dumb, ignored or not heard, saying things that are non-sequitur (due to either not hearing the discussion due to my ADHD, or, misunderstanding due to the learning disability or Aspergers), and other things.
I have horrible anger and, if I didn't restrain myself, would constantly be telling people to F off or cussing them out, for them either ignoring me, or doing things that irritate me (of which there are many), or doing things that hurt me (which is extremely easy; I am quite thin-skinned, much to my annoyance). I could very easily end up beating people up, and ending up in jail and in a world of hurt and regret, without the restraint that i'm forced to use.
I am sensitive to certain physical stimuli, as is common in Asperger's, and I believe as a result of this, I have what's known as misophonia, which is a hatred of certain sounds that sends someone into instant anger upon hearing them.
I am always worried people think I'm a creep and a weirdo. I don't see anything that would allude to that, but I'm always paranoid about it, knowing that Asperger's people can seem creepy due to their "differentness". The fact that I'm a single guy, with no kids, probably tends to give people and even greater pause. I tend to hover over people while they are in a conversation, because I hate interrupting, but that seems to make people uncomfortable; sometimes I forego talking to people who are already in a conversation for that reason.
I could go on and on with all the details but, I dont want to bore anyone, and verbosity is another huge issue of mine (and not getting to the point or taking 20 rabbit trails trying to get to it), so I'm going to just pretty much end it by saying: I'm sick of living this way, suffice it to say. So I am joining this site and chatting with you all, to get tips and support. I hope that I can receive that from you but also assist and uplift all of you, also.
Thanks so much everyone. Hugs!
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