Facial Differences?

[OkRad]

I have been reading all about the ways we force smiles and fake normal. I do this all the time. I had to practice the Fake Face. Why do we have to do this?

All I can think is going on is that naturally we have faces that make people offended. SO when we tone it down on purpose to show we are angry, it's like GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR when we think we are just being "mmmmmmmmm"

I sometimes look in the mirror when I am intense and see it is like a caricature. It's as if a normal person were exaggerating an emotion.

Have any of you been told you were very "animated" when you were young? I can only think this trait becomes humourous at best and offensive at worse as we age? When you are ten and eyes are wide open and eager----great! But when you are 30 with the same expression.....maybe not so fitting for the NTs?

I try not to fake so much now. It's ok when I go into a new place. I don't mind being the weirdo right off the bat. What hurts is when you are accepted and the REJECTED. When you think you are liked and then NOT.

My best strategy and to not seek to be liked from the start BUT invariably someone will want to reach in. They will want to see why I am "sad" even if I am not sad at all. THey will reach in and make me feel I am liked when really they were just curious, or trying to help, or whatever NTs do.

THen their curiosity is sated, I have started to fake and act like it's all over , they move on and I am stuck with that fake smile to aspease them

You can't go back. If you go back they think you are seeking attention when you never were in the first place! If you go back , they assume something is wrong again but the second time around, they won't spend the emotional energy because they just think you are faking, when you are NOT faking and were only faking when they got into your face and life and then kicked you out!!

 

[Judge]

If I were to be graded in various terms of my ability to mask my traits and behaviors, my lowest grade would probably have been in how I emote facially. Most of the time I can say the right things at the right time, however my face could never keep up with it.

Where I'd often tend to get the proverbial, "What's wrong?" from most people within my tightest social orbit.

Maybe I should have tried harder to become a professional poker player.

 

[OkRad]

If I were to be graded in various terms of my ability to mask my traits and behaviors, my lowest grade would probably have been in how I emote facially. Most of the time I can say the right things at the right time, however my face could never keep up with it.

Where I'd often tend to get the proverbial, "What's wrong?" from most people within my tightest social orbit.

Maybe I should have tried harder to become a professional poker player.

Haha. That is brilliant. Me,too, though I would be the SMILER. Oh, she is winning? Oh she has a good hand ? Oh, she has ANOTHER good hand? WTHECK, ANOTHER GOOD HAND? Hahahaha

 

[dragoncat16]

@Judge I have the same issue. People can literally read me like a book.

 

[celestialregale]

I can relate. I don't force a smile for pictures and am invariably asked 'what's wrong?' 'why so sad?' when I'm not. I think I smile at normal times, I'm just really bad at faking it when I'm not elated!

 

[xudo]

I have always found the opposite to the sort of 'caricature' type of expression you mention. I don't have a very expressive face at all. I can fake a smile, but not well enough for most people's liking. I think I am doing a good job of smiling (for example for photos) and then am constantly told to smile. I'm like "I AM SMILING".

 

[Katleya]

Hmm. My face is pretty emotionless, and what emotions do show usually do so after a longer time than they "NaTurally" should (see what I did there?).
That being said, I can also under certain circonstances pull a completely blank face that I'm told is a mixture of impressive & scary, I'm very good at showing those emotions on the "angry/fed up with your crap/can't believe people are that stupid" spectrum. As for faking emotions, umm, yeah, most of the positive ones. The problem is that I've based those on what I picked up from TV, so they are stereotypical and exaggerated; the other problem is that the same applies for genuine positive emotions. So I went from being happy & looking like I belong in a coffin when it's a party in my mind, complete with confetti, happy music, etc., to now being in "meh" situations where I look like I'm about to bring the entire cheerleading crew. Can't find balance.

 

[Gritches]

I got a haircut today. My conversation with the stylist was absolutely electric, we connected like peanut butter and jelly, but she kept me facing the mirror the whole time. I realized I wasn't making any facial expressions because I just wasn't dedicating the energy to that but rather to saying the right thing and not making an ass of myself.

And seeing that lack of facial expression despite an emotionally charged conversation, I kinda got why it makes people uncomfortable. It's a little creepy-looking, and makes any sort of emotional content, real or forced, seem very fake.

So I guess that's why. I always figured I just seemed stoic when I went expressionless - I guess not, it just looked weird.

 

[bails0bub]

So I guess that's why. I always figured I just seemed stoic when I went expressionless - I guess not, it just looked weird.

recently realizing the same things about my self. kinda lame to realize that most of the people who ever talk to you only do so out of some misguided attempt to "fix" you only to later resent you because you "refuse" to change, because you keep being silent most of the time and completely unexpressive.

 

[Fridgemagnetman]

I got a haircut today. My conversation with the stylist was absolutely electric, we connected like peanut butter and jelly, but she kept me facing the mirror the whole time. I realized I wasn't making any facial expressions because I just wasn't dedicating the energy to that but rather to saying the right thing and not making an ass of myself.

And seeing that lack of facial expression despite an emotionally charged conversation, I kinda got why it makes people uncomfortable. It's a little creepy-looking, and makes any sort of emotional content, real or forced, seem very fake.

So I guess that's why. I always figured I just seemed stoic when I went expressionless - I guess not, it just looked weird.

My passport used to look like a mass murderer, so i was told.

When i renewed it i kept the same picture.

 

[bails0bub]

almost every picture I have ever been in is like that

 

[Bella Pines]

Now that I'm older, I fake less. I don't know why, maybe because I don't need to or Mayne I'm just tired and can't be bothered.

But the funniest advice I've had is about my smile. A whisper in my ear to say... "Psst, too many teeth"