everything related to love

[faith]

i am 16. and yes i do realize that i am still young but i am scared that.... okay so i am not very good at emotions. just recently my friend lost her dad in a car accident. and its was a few new emotions that i haven't ever shown before. so i was wondering from anybody who has this same problem... as you go older does this get better? do you ever truly understand love? if anybody can help me or give me some answers it would be great. thank you so much!

 

[Mia]

I'm sorry your friend lost her father, it must be very hard for her. I think it's good that she has a friend like you to talk to about it, who will listen. Lost my father many years ago, but I still miss him. Don't think love for someone like a parent really ever goes away, or for friends or family. It's something you endure even though its painful and hurts, as you get older it becomes a little less hard, but it doesn't disappear completely.

 

[WereBear]

Like everything else, handling our emotions gets better with practice. I have found that when I am suffering with grief, just not being alone is a soothing thing.

You can be there for your friend and not have to say or do anything much. Maybe that can help.

 

[Tom]

Emotions are a complicated thing. Theoretically managing them should become easier with experience and practice. But my observation is that a very large percentage of people struggle with it indefinately or handle them only in truly crapworthy fashion. My advice is to follow very old advice: Know thyself. That is pay attention to your feelings and work at managing them as well as you can. External guidelines can help, but I think you always have to customize them for your own particular sensibilities. Like a car geek devotedly works on and tweaks his project car so too your performance will be best/smoothest if you pay similar attention to understanding yourself and making sensible/wise choices.

 

[Mathalamus]

as you get older, you may be able to control your emotions, or show more of it at the right time, or express it "properly", if there is such a thing.

however, all this only works if you intensely focus on yourself, note how you feel, what caused it, and why. youll be able to know how you feel, and to properly react based on those feelings. it may take a while.

 

[Pondering]

Some people are more in tune with emotions than others. Some are able to understand the feelings of others' while others may only be able to be in tune with only their own emotions. Deep down, even the most logical people tend to have the most emotions. Some naturally are so in tune with everyone's emotions including their own. Learning to balance emotion can be a constant struggle all through life but it does depend on how willing you are to work on them. Emotions don't make sense from a purely logical point of view. They can spiral out of control, start and stop when you least expect, and tear you to pieces. However, emotions can be a tool. Without emotions, there are no friendships, no art, no music, no sympathy, and no connection with anything. Emotions are like dogs. Either you can learn to control it or you or it will control you and run free wherever it pleases. But in order to figure out which, you have to pay attention to your inner self. Emotions are crafty things in that they can so secretly hide behind a person's motives. As far as other people's emotions go, never say they do or don't feel something because some are masters of concealing their emotions. I might also say that dealing with any kind of emotion is like lifting weights. If you don't deal with them regularly, you won't be able to handle them. If you get used to building up to handling the bigger, heavier ones, they aren't so bad to deal with when the biggest ones come your way - you'll be strong enough to carry them because let's face it: negative emotions are heavy. Emotions are also like knives. They can either be useful - like cutting into the fruit of happiness or something - or harmful. But it's a choice no less for the user. There's a right way to use them and a wrong way to use them. How will you use them?