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Perhaps someone should start a "Mean boyz" thread?Mean girling, 'mean girls' with only one side of a story isn't fair or right. It is repeating the action one is venting about. The whole pot calling the kettle black. It is a universal human reaction.
From the article you presented.
Adult Mean Girl Behavior
What most people refer to as "mean girl behavior" is really relational aggression, which is a specific type of bullying designed to harm the social relationships and status of an individual. Essentially, people who engage in relational aggression aim to make you look bad to others.
I have been there too.My reputation has been assassinated so bad that I even question my own self and doubt any good qualities I thought I had.
Although it can be referred to as "mean girl" behavior, relational aggression is not restricted to girls and women. Anyone can participate in this type of bullying. The motivation for this behavior can be anything from jealousy to the desire for popularity and power.
Women around my block are jealous that I have nice second hand clothes, but also men! Why would men be jealous if you seem to be more well-off than they are? Because they like to treat me like trash so they'd like me to look like trash so that it makes sense that I'm inferior and to be easily dominated.It's hard to decipher whether someone's behaviour is just jealousy or if they're like it because they're the opposite of jealous.
When I was at high school (towards the end) I found myself a best friend who I could actually tell was jealous of me. She would criticise my choices, for example would go on at me to spend my money I was trying to save up, probably because she was jealous that I had more money than she did (she came from a bigger family so I don't think her parents gave her much pocket money). She also kept on and on at me to wear make-up and said it would make me look pretty. While at the time it felt like an insult, looking back I actually think that she was insecure about her looks and relied on make-up to feel better and felt jealous of me for having the confidence to go out without make-up every day and still look pretty.
She also wanted to control me but I wouldn't let her. I don't like being controlled unless I consent to it.
I also got bullied by "friends" who were from foster homes, because it seems they were jealous at how stable and secure I was with my family.
And I think my experience I had on other internet forums (being subtly bullied by other women) was due to them coming from dysfunctional families or a lifetime of abuse and seeing how simple and loving my life is/was (the ones that were nasty towards me all had alcohol and drug addiction to some degree and had been abused a lot and seem to have narcissistic parents that hated them, etc). I felt sympathetic at first but because they couldn't cope with how "perfect" my life was compared to their's they started turning on me, manipulating, accusing and shaming me with words ending in -ist and -phobe, expecting me to continue feeling sympathy for them (which I no longer had the energy for after that) and probably wanting to bring me down with them.
I can be very sympathetic towards people who have had a rough time but when it comes to grown adults trying to take their insecurities out on me I find I need to put myself first and not to let myself be dragged down with them (this is a skill that has taken me a long time to learn, as before I just let people treat me how they wanted because I thought they needed someone to be their punchbag. Now I refuse to be anybody's punchbag).
I can get jealous of people but I try not to show it. Only once I have shown it, when I was an immature teenager, because I was in a frustrated state of depression and social isolation, but I apologised afterwards and told them that envy had got the better of me.
Although all the findings pretty much fit with my experience it's concerning that someone would publish conclusions for such a complex issue using such a small sample of the population.To reach their conclusions, 573 US adults were sent an online survey asking them to rate themselves on a 13-point narcissistic personality scale. They were also asked about their motives for using Facebook.
573 people is not too bad. Self reported surveys are not ideal, but it's better than case studies or smaller sample sizes (ones with less than 300 people).
Why does the misperception exist that women are more likely to exhibit "mean girl" behavior (relational aggression) than males?
I suspect it's related to societal expectations when it comes to female behavior. Sometimes people call certain songs by female musicians "angry girl music." They don't make the same distinction for male musicians.