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Don’t make the extra effort to dress up for girls.

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It's not about "impressing" anyone, but rather, it's a respect thing.
Right on. Grandpa taught me that you dress out of respect for the people you expect to be with. Whether bankers or construction workers, Gramps dressed for others, not himself. A lifetime later, it seems like sound advice.
 
So this is half satire, but also very true.

I've worn pajamas at Walmart. More times than I can count.

I thought it was a thing. One takes a bath and grooms themself properly, and then puts on clean p.j.'s and slippers to go shopping at Walmart.

I tell you, there isn't anything finer than strolling the aisles, comparing prices and quality, while in a nice, conservative pair of pajamas, and sipping a cup of Starbucks. I get my best supply runs done in pajamas.

Lap of luxury and all that.

But you can't look like an ignorant member of the plebian class. I may live in Section 8, but I don't want people to know that. So, the key to looking soccer mommish, while shopping in pajamas is to at least do your hair and put on a nice sweater over your pajamas. Unless you're a punk rock 20 year old, or shopping for Theraflu, no matted hair or bathrobes.
 
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I don’t like getting dressed up either. But I agree it’s best to try to look good and well groomed for a date. In general I’d like to be able to just be myself with a date, so I’d be happy with casual dress for both of us. Of course I wouldn’t dictate to my date what she should wear - I’d let her wear what she wanted, too (except for fur - that’s a dealbreaker for me). Like if she preferred to wear skirts and blouses regularly, and had no problem with my dressing casually at the same time, I wouldn’t complain.

However, this got me thinking: What if my date suggested we both get dressed up for a formal evening activity? It’s probably not something I’d say a firm no to, but it might not be much fun either.
 
I don’t like getting dressed up either. But I agree it’s best to try to look good and well groomed for a date. In general I’d like to be able to just be myself with a date, so I’d be happy with casual dress for both of us. Of course I wouldn’t dictate to my date what she should wear - I’d let her wear what she wanted, too (except for fur - that’s a dealbreaker for me). Like if she preferred to wear skirts and blouses regularly, and had no problem with my dressing casually at the same time, I wouldn’t complain.

However, this got me thinking: What if my date suggested we both get dressed up for a formal evening activity? It’s probably not something I’d say a firm no to, but it might not be much fun either.
See if someone was wearing fur in order to be more sustainable, as that fur and skin will last over a decade, and provide real body warmth, rather than wrapping one's self in petrochemicals, I would actually prefer that in many ways.
 
For me, (clean)
  • button-down, short-sleeve shirt & cargo shorts in the summer and
  • T-shirt & jeans for the rest of the year.
 
It could also be a sign that "I'm confident in who I am, I don't care about what others think" or "there are bigger problems in this world than my clothes being clean". I'm not saying it can't be the respect thing, but what people see and what is reality might be different.

Definitely agree with this. I think it's more a sign of neuroticism to need to 'look your best all the time' at all costs, even though impressing others and looking your best definitely matters in some scenarios. Especially when you can benefit from it (interviews, dates, jobs, and things like that definitely come to mind).

The downside? If you've got to put on fake attire, you're probably wearing a fake persona as well. When in life do the people who actually matter to you care about what you wear? Hopefully, never.

Also, I'm the neurotic person I speak about in posts like this. I don't even like the thought of stepping out the front door in sweat pants, that scares the crap out of me!
 
My guy would look wrong in "dress pants". He typically gets around looking a bit beachy in shorts and T shirts and singlets or work pants and work shirts. Dressing up for him is a well fitting pair of jeans and a nice tucked in shirt and belt. He wears army boots mostly with his shorts and sometime cowboy boots if dressing up with jeans. I've never worried in my life about how my guy friends dress, although I wouldn't mind having a say about it. I think I am quite "gifted" in the fashion department.

He is a removalist, but used to be a data recovery computer technician and a surf life guard. And before that a horticulturalist.
I do want him to lose his holey shirts though and the stained ones. Not a good look, by any means.
I admit I would like to take him to a rave and have him look "cool and groovy" which would be a huge stretch for him, waaay out of his comfort zone at this stage, but I am still hoping. Yes, we are middle aged but actually still very young at heart and we probably always will be. I have my own, very unique and eclectic dress style and I like colours and colour co ordinating, but, I'm not too judgey about how people dress. It is the inside that counts.

My dad is a shocker for looking like a homeless dude. Sigh. I love him to bits but he is soooo oblivious and unkempt. He has no success with the ladies and has given up on that. He lives for his thesis and nothing else seems to matter that much, although he does try a little for my half sister and me, but, not in the clothes department. Sigh. I wanted him to try again for a relationship after my step mum and him broke up, but he has completely given up and his dress sense shows that.

There is "being yourself" and then there is dressing like you have given up; there's a difference and I think the distinction should be made. A little care in your appearance goes a long way and no care doesn't bode well for your love life, or in fact, your social status and social opportunities, in general.
 
I still recall a discussion of office attire policies and that someone pointed out that one of our competitors required men to wear their jackets with ties while sitting in their workstation.

I thought that was barbaric! At least in our case we could put our jacket on a clothes hanger inside our cubicle.
 
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The problem is after a certain age, half of the population gives up. Especially if you have been with someone quite awhile. The other half may get dressed up but feel out of place because everybody dresses casual if you live in warmer climates. So getting dressed up in FL and HI means - no holes in your cargo shorts, no flip flops, maybe sneakers instead that are clean. Woman will wear dressy sandals, and not pajama bottoms, or a bathing suit top. It really gets down to where you live. Which then you have to decipher casual resort dressware? Which is? No pajamas? It's supposed to be casual but reek of designer labels. Dress up, dress down, punk out, goth up, rock on, soccer mom out.
 
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Well. I do like to look good at times. Sometimes it pays off in odd ways. A week ago I decided to try a new watering hole. I dressed in good jeans, a western shirt and my tan leather vest. I was there by myself, minding my own business waiting for my order of Dragon's Milk (Stout aged in used Bourbon barrels). Two women came up to me and invited me to a table with their friends on a girl's night out. I had a great time, being fed pizza and enjoying the conversation. This so rarely happens to me.
 
For dating purposes I still think you should dress how ever you are most comfortable, and that will be different for every person, I'm saying that because you don't need to feel wrong in your clothes, there are other things to worry about on dates :) and if your date don't like what you want to wear, then that is probably not a relationship worth building.

I like outdoor clothing, like from fjallraven, so I would choose my favorites from that series for a date, and we would go to the zoo, it's safe and there are plenty of neutral things to talk about :)

I do dress traditionally for things like a wedding or funerals, but if someone had shown up in a dirty t-shirt for my own wedding with JJ, I would be as happy, and not think any less of them. I know other people see it differently, and I accept that.
 
Love guys in tailored black jeans and loafers with no socks. Just screams masculinity. But my guy loves his flip flops and tee-shirts. Has a medical degree but wears his shorts until he has holes. Too funny.
 
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So this is half satire, but also very true.

I've worn pajamas at Walmart. More times than I can count.

I thought it was a thing. One takes a bath and grooms themself properly, and then puts on clean p.j.'s and slippers to go shopping at Walmart.

I tell you, there isn't anything finer than strolling the aisles, comparing prices and quality, while in a nice, conservative pair of pajamas, and sipping a cup of Starbucks. I get my best supply runs done in pajamas.

Lap of luxury and all that.

But you can't look like an ignorant member of the plebian class. I may live in Section 8, but I don't want people to know that. So, the key to looking soccer mommish, while shopping in pajamas is to at least do your hair and put on a nice sweater over your pajamas. Unless you're a punk rock 20 year old, or shopping for Theraflu, no matted hair or bathrobes.
l mean if youre only going there to pick up some stuff and then go to a self serve check out, probably wont even talk to anyone, who cares!
 
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I would never consider going out in my pajamas,...
if for no other reason than not having enough pockets.
 
When l arrived in LA, l saw a lady wearing pajama bottoms at grocery store. It was a fad that took off.
I dress to please myself. Which sometimes is oversized sweaters and tops. Other times, tailored. Wear what you want. I did want to redress this guy l was seeing, but it isn't his style, so it's not right of me to think that. He likes casual, and simple.
So what does dressing up me to you @Wolfnox ? A attractive polo shirt, and some fitting pants is dressy. Dressing up these days? The standards have really relaxed.
I don’t know. I really don’t.
 
Right on. Grandpa taught me that you dress out of respect for the people you expect to be with. Whether bankers or construction workers, Gramps dressed for others, not himself. A lifetime later, it seems like sound advice.
I think yours is the reply I was looking for. I can get behind dressing respectfully for others.
 
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