Does anyone here think they're more self-sufficient than most NTs?

[Judge]

Me. The last thing I want is to inconvenience anyone or be a burden, seeing how I was treated for being that way growing up…

Even now, my parents feel like I’m kind of a burden even though they don’t have to help me with much. An emotional burden, maybe :/

Sorry to hear. They should be proud of you!

 

[Shamar]

I've always felt more self-sufficient and independent than most people, and most people are NT. I was recently diagnosed with autism, and I'm finding it interesting that so few autistics seem to be REALLY self-sufficient, even though at the same time I've heard of autistics who have high-stress, high-powered jobs like veterinarian, doctor, therapist, retail sales, teacher, etc. My exec functioning is normal per my assessment. No ADHD or anything else. Maybe that's why, no ADHD? Maybe I'm a true Aspie/Little Professor? Level 1 is described as "minimal or low" support needs. I'm zero support needs. Wasn't afraid to go to college out of state at age 17. Am I a "super autistic" or some kind of anomaly? I don't get scared of things that frighten most people. Not afraid of the dark, being alone in a house at night, and though I hate crowds, I never feel overwhelm.

There is self sufficient and then there is self sufficient. Because of my exploration career, I can survive, even live, in environments that would kill most people. Put me in a city, and I am pretty much helpless.

 

[Atrapa Almas]

I like how this thread is developing.

Are we a burden to others? Or are we a burden to those who are addicted to lies and cheating?

Are NTs self-sufficient? Or are they some kind of parasitic workers that do the less possible if allowed or that use others to do their share?

Do even self-sufficient have any meaning in a society were we need cars, whose parts come from a dozen of countries, made from hundreds of companys? Were we need electricity? Were we buy food in super markets? Were we use internet to connect each other? Is there a single NT who is self sufficient?

If autists are a burden to others, how is that they are at the end of the bulling chain? Those NT who bully are not a burden to others? If being a burden to others is a problem, why antisocial people adapt so easily to our society?

When NT cheat each other, have more childs that those they can take care care of, when they get drugged, commit crimes, ... Are they not a burden to others or to society?

I do know that I have social problems to work properly in groups, when the group goes left I go rigth, when the group laughs I am worried and when they are sad I am happy. Is that being a burden? Or the burden is the inhability of the group to accept differences? Would the group work if it was made of autists? Or made of more accepting people?

Would be NTs more accepting if they were educated differently?

The more I learn the less answers I have, the more questions I made mysellf and the less I like the NT vs Autists thing. Im starting to target good hearted accepting people (NT and ND) and not so good hearted accepting ones (NT and ND).

I want to check it, but I would say that most groups made from good accepting people will just work and groups made by rooted people will not, even if they all have great social skills to mask their true rooted inners.

 

[AprilR]

I am definitely not self sufficient financially but emotionally i am pretty self sufficient. Having a therapist helps with that

I had little to no help from my parents or any friend while growing up and i still managed to become a well adjusted person. I am proud of myself for it

 

[Slime_Punk]

Contrary to most of you, not at all. I'd be completely doomed without the people who care about me. If I had to survive alone I wouldn't be able to make it. Emotionally, financially, socially, spiritually, etc

Most NTs think I'm a loser, and maybe they're right. But all I can do is my personal best

 

[Leo Zed]

I have difficulty in understanding many of the replies in this thread, but that is from my shortcomings and not from the contributors. Since my mind works a lot in black and white thinking, it seems to me that one is either self sufficient or not self sufficient. To me is seems that a perfectly healthy NT is always going to be self sufficient - except if that NT decides not to be self sufficient (e.g., lazy) or has a medical issue (e.g., a physical disability). I guess it depends on how self sufficiency is defined. I think a person is self sufficient if that person can survive in his/her own environment without help. I am not self sufficient because I cannot survive in my environment without help - else I would soon end up on the streets and perish.

So first, how can one be more self sufficient than an NT who is perfectly healthy? Second, I don’t understand some of the gray areas described by some. Either you are able to survive or you perish without assistance. Maybe I am thinking too black and white, but that’s the way I see it. (Unless one is referring to a particular attribute.)

@Silhouette Mirage You are not a loser. You said that you are doing your best. That’s all that counts. In fact, I don’t like the word ”loser”, it ranks up there with the word “hate”.

 

[Atrapa Almas]

I have difficulty in understanding many of the replies in this thread, but that is from my shortcomings and not from the contributors. Since my mind works a lot in black and white thinking, it seems to me that one is either self sufficient or not self sufficient. To me is seems that a perfectly healthy NT is always going to be self sufficient - except if that NT decides not to be self sufficient (e.g., lazy) or has a medical issue (e.g., a physical disability). I guess it depends on how self sufficiency is defined. I think a person is self sufficient if that person can survive in his/her own environment without help. I am not self sufficient because I cannot survive in my environment without help - else I would soon end up on the streets and perish.

So first, how can one be more self sufficient than an NT who is perfectly healthy? Second, I don’t understand some of the gray areas described by some. Either you are able to survive or you perish without assistance. Maybe I am thinking too black and white, but that’s the way I see it. (Unless one is referring to a particular attribute.)

@Silhouette Mirage You are not a loser. You said that you are doing your best. That’s all that counts. In fact, I don’t like the word ”loser”, it ranks up there with the word “hate”.

Hello @Leo Zed

I am not sure if I can help you understand all the thread, but let me focus on helping you on this one question: So first, how can one be more self sufficient than an NT who is perfectly healthy?

So NT are the mayority of the population. Lets see how can I be more self sufficient than the mayority of the population.

If the average salary of the mayority of the population is 10,000 MXN per month at México and I am earning 20,000 MXN per month, then I am more self sufficient in that aspect than them, who are mostly NT.

If the average savings of the mayority of the population is (lets say) 3 months of earnings, and I have saved 6 months of earnings, then I am more self sufficient in that aspect than them, who are mostly NT.

If the average health of the mayority of the population is bad (obesity, lack of fitness, etc) and I am fit and healthy, then I am more self sufficient in that aspect than them, who are mostly NT.

When enougth of this important aspects are checked, and if I find that I do better than the average, then I can claim that I am doing better and/or I am more self sufficient than the average/NTs.

 

[Autisticool]

When enougth of this important aspects are checked, and if I find that I do better than the average, then I can claim that I am doing better and/or I am more self sufficient than the average/NTs.

This is a really good way of presenting the case. As an autistic person, I still consider myself far more self-sufficient than the vast majority of NTs. Many NTs are obese, smoke and drink too much. I'm at a healthy weight, work out intensely, never smoked, don't drink or do drugs; I'm very "clean." So right off the bat, this all puts me ahead of most people.

Many NTs are involved in abusive relationships, with women usually being the victim. I've never had this problem. Most women can't throw a punch. You don't want to be on the receiving end of my right hook! Most women struggle to take out the trash and can't move a big potted plant without a man's help. I'm very strong and never need a man to help me do things. If I do, it's a TWO-person job anyways. Thus, my physical strength is another factor that puts me in that much higher self-sufficiency category, while I see NT women struggling all the time lifting and carrying things.

Many NTs, due to their impulsiveness, can't manage their finances and are drowning in debt. They spend more than they have and live beyond their means. But I've always watched my budget and see bigger pictures financially, while my NT brother has made disastrous financial choices over the years.

I'm not ruled by emotions. I'm ruled by logic and facts. This alone puts me ahead. NTs all around me over-react and get too emotional. So many people are struggling, and since NTs are the big majority, this means that many struggling people are NT. They do stupid things like have sex with people they've known less than 90 minutes, then get pregnant, have all sorts of problems stemming from that. They get swept up by peer pressure and worry too much what others think. I can go on and on.

At least one person here noted that perhaps hyper self-sufficiency is born out of not wanting to be a burden. In my case, the idea of depending on people to get through life is VERY UNNERVING. The idea of someone ELSE handling my finances, assisting with adulting, etc., is just SO unpalatable and foul. My parents expected all their kids to be very self-sufficient. Maybe it's a combination of upbringing and my innate wiring.

 

[Knower of nothing]

I like how this thread is developing.

Are we a burden to others? Or are we a burden to those who are addicted to lies and cheating?

Are NTs self-sufficient? Or are they some kind of parasitic workers that do the less possible if allowed or that use others to do their share?

Do even self-sufficient have any meaning in a society were we need cars, whose parts come from a dozen of countries, made from hundreds of companys? Were we need electricity? Were we buy food in super markets? Were we use internet to connect each other? Is there a single NT who is self sufficient?

If autists are a burden to others, how is that they are at the end of the bulling chain? Those NT who bully are not a burden to others? If being a burden to others is a problem, why antisocial people adapt so easily to our society?

When NT cheat each other, have more childs that those they can take care care of, when they get drugged, commit crimes, ... Are they not a burden to others or to society?

I do know that I have social problems to work properly in groups, when the group goes left I go rigth, when the group laughs I am worried and when they are sad I am happy. Is that being a burden? Or the burden is the inhability of the group to accept differences? Would the group work if it was made of autists? Or made of more accepting people?

Would be NTs more accepting if they were educated differently?

The more I learn the less answers I have, the more questions I made mysellf and the less I like the NT vs Autists thing. Im starting to target good hearted accepting people (NT and ND) and not so good hearted accepting ones (NT and ND).

I want to check it, but I would say that most groups made from good accepting people will just work and groups made by rooted people will not, even if they all have great social skills to mask their true rooted inners.

Each burden that you can carry without taking it out on others is no burden at all.

 

[Atrapa Almas]

Each burden that you can carry without taking it out on others is no burden at all.

I dont understand that. Could you elaborate?

If I carry a burden that just affects me, its still a burden to me. I also count. Why would not I count myself? Did I lost something?

 

[Judge]

A very old Protestant-based drive to "pull one's self up by their bootstraps". Seems a bit precarious in modern times.

After all, at times in one's life they get by with a little help from someone. Regardless of neurological considerations.

The problem with pulling yourself up by your own bootstraps is not everyone has working bootstraps

Texans understand boots. So that’s a great metaphor to help us find some common ground on many of the social and political differences dividing America these...

www.dallasnews.com

 

[Streetwise]

I've always felt more self-sufficient and independent than most people, and most people are NT. I was recently diagnosed with autism, and I'm finding it interesting that so few autistics seem to be REALLY self-sufficient, even though at the same time I've heard of autistics who have high-stress, high-powered jobs like veterinarian, doctor, therapist, retail sales, teacher, etc. My exec functioning is normal per my assessment. No ADHD or anything else. Maybe that's why, no ADHD? Maybe I'm a true Aspie/Little Professor? Level 1 is described as "minimal or low" support needs. I'm zero support needs. Wasn't afraid to go to college out of state at age 17. Am I a "super autistic" or some kind of anomaly? I don't get scared of things that frighten most people. Not afraid of the dark, being alone in a house at night, and though I hate crowds, I never feel overwhelm.

Sort of ,but didnt know i was autistic, just knew people wouldn't help ME.
Mine wasn't self sufficiency perse but fear of death

 

[Streetwise]

A very old Protestant-based drive to "pull one's self up by their bootstraps". Seems a bit precarious in modern times.

After all, at times in one's life they get by with a little help from someone. Regardless of neurological considerations.

The problem with pulling yourself up by your own bootstraps is not everyone has working bootstraps

Texans understand boots. So that’s a great metaphor to help us find some common ground on many of the social and political differences dividing America these...

www.dallasnews.com

Didn't know it was exclusive to protestant christians but anymore very needed correction of a libelous statement needs to be in religion

 

[Judge]

Didn't know it was exclusive to protestant christians but anymore very needed correction of a libelous statement needs to be in religion

Nothing libelous- or exclusive about it. An idiom relating back to Calvinism and perhaps even the Puritans.

Better known as the "Protestant Work Ethic". A cultural and economic consideration that still seems to motivate so many Americans. Regardless of neurology- or religion. Though in my opinion it seems outdated given the complexities of a modern economy. Not every citizen has an inherent ability to indefinitely remain economically viable.

Study: The Protestant Work Ethic Is Real

Thanks to a recent paper in the Journal of Economic Behavior & Organization, we finally have some answers for why Americans work so hard.

psmag.com

 

[Leo Zed]

@Atrapa Almas Thanks for your explanation. That makes a lot more sense now. Sometimes I need things spelled out or I am left with something totally different in my mind.

 

[Knower of nothing]

I dont understand that. Could you elaborate?

If I carry a burden that just affects me, its still a burden to me. I also count. Why would not I count myself? Did I lost something?

Sorry, karmic interpretation. I don't really feel like explaining either haha it's not super relevant to the thread. If you got free time you can wonder about these non-outside affecting burdens and how much they might weigh. Not a bad direction to think in regardless.

 

[Yeshuasdaughter]

Self sufficient? That is a complicated one to answer. For money and housing, I have government assistance, due to my disability.

But in figuring things out in life, and charting my direction, I am very independent. If I want to learn something, I teach myself. I don't ask for help very often, and so I often invent new ways of doing things.

 

[Shevek]

I was pretty much a free-range kid, and left early. I had access to some tools and materials, as well as books. I did some prizewinning engineering and built the hardware to demonstrate it. Twice I have travelled solo for months, looking for a new home. The first time was a bicycle tour, with some equipment I'd invented without talking to any other bikers. I do my own taxes, prepare food from ingredients, and do my own repairs. I'm thinking of hiring a car mechanic for some major work, though, and don't know how to go about that.

 

[Regretfully Diagnosed]

Yes, but mostly to prove it to myself. I am deeply ashamed of my autistic diagnosis and because of this I am always self-concious about needing others to help me through life.
The autism diagnosis has come to dominate my life, as well as the number of times I was brow-beat and berated over it.
I am absolutely obsessed with self-sufficiency as a way of proving I am not worthless and inferior.


Every year, I take an extended trip to the Rocky Mountains where I find a random place of public land. I take minimal gear with me and I set up a small camp there. I spend a couple weeks hiking around the area, exploring it and living mostly off the land.

I do this to prove to myself that I am not incapable of living on my own. I also do this to prove I can live in diverse environments. I am self-sufficient in the heart of Midtown Manhattan and in the deepest of the wilderness. I also travel internationally, completely on my own.


I do all of this to reinforce to myself and to the worl that I can. I've done this since I was forced into autism therapy. I do it to prove to myself that I am a full fledged human being and I am at least as good and worthwhile as anyone else.
I hate my diagnosis and will not let it define me. If anyone says I cannot be self sufficient here is my response:
Oh yeah? Where? Where the hell was I not self sufficient? Was it in getting around to all the sites of New York? Was it in the middle of nowhere in Wyoming? Was it in Fiji? Was it in Spain? Where the hell was it?? I've proven to myself and the world that I will not be limited by the hate of the diagnosis. I will go anywhere and everywhere on my own.
There is nothing I can't do. I am not some kind of unempathetic, "no common sense" "unable to care for themselves" "needy" or "hopeless" autistic. There is no environment I cannot survive in.


I HAVE BEEN UP TO MY CHEST IN QUICKSAND! I have been surrounded by rattlesnakes. I've been in the heart of cities where nobody spoke English. I've swam through whitewater rapids


I did this all for one reason: So nobody could tell me I was disabled or that I was less than other human beings.

 

[Hylian]

I've tried really hard to be self-sufficient, but I'm not entirely independent yet. While I do a lot of things for myself, I still can't really function that well if I don't have support from people. I actually get burnt out and struggle even  with support which is frustrating.