Does anyone else get kicked off of other forums for being "rude"?

[2vette2camaro]

As I am interested in different things- from growing long hair, to coupons, saving money, etc, I am on several forums, or WAS.... I have gotten "kicked off" of several forums for speaking my mind, my opinions and they are saying I am being "rude" and offending the other people.

Does anyone else have this problem? I don't believe in "beating around the bush" and of course, I always think my opinion is the only opinion and can't understand why people are ignorant and just can't "get it".

So.....has anyone else ever got kicked out of a forum?

 

[2010Dolby]

I never have but I find it a lot easier to be polite on the internet. If I'm a party and someone pisses me off I cant "turn off the computer and smoke a cigarette" so of course I'll confront the problem, but on the computer its much easier for me to be not get angry.

 

[King_Oni]

Never been kicked off a forum, but every once in a while I put up a disclaimer just to make sure people will not get offended. Not "understanding" the logics of offending someone makes it quite hard, but my experience is that something like religion is something people have an issue with for example.

It's kinda silly up to the point where opinions hurt people so much, that you cannot express them. Similarly, there have been people being shot for stating opinions.

With a lot of stuff I sometimes wonder if it even contributes to the argument even. And one thing I mostly will not engage in, is online fights and namecalling... that's one of those things that gets people banned I think.

 

[HelloDizzy]

I was kicked off of a recover form for cutting and eating disorders for having my own opinion about scars.

 

[King_Oni]

While I believe in mods and all on forums, to keep it a bit "apropriate" I don't feel people should be "silenced" for their opinion, especially if it isn't against forum rules and just something that rubs a mod the wrong way.

However, with the internet connecting people all over the world, with whatever background they might have, I think it's silly to expect "common sense" as a hidden rule, especially if you're also "adressing" the world population and all cultures. If a forum, for example, wants to keep inapropriate language at bay, then by all means, define what inapropriate language is and make sure people understand it. A lot of terms are really to vague to apply... and of all the forums I visited I have never seen a list compiled of words you cannot use, but I think, that if you're enforcing rules on something like language you actually need a blacklist, as well as a userbase that does not intend to troll to work around the word (if you don't want people to use ****, make sure people don't try to get smartypants and go "copulate", just for the sake of using the word).

And that actually is a sad reality I think. We cannot apply universal common sense, thus we need rules, people are to lazy to read rules thus they either click "ok" or don't even join in on forums because of the sheer overload of terms you have to agree with. But if we dont... I'm quite sure forums will end up like 4chan... which is ok... for on board, but not every board.

 

[HelloDizzy]

When I was 17 or so, I said my scars from self injury were battle scars (I now see it differently, I want rid of them) and I was banned for this.
I was also banned from an eating disorder recovery site for expressing that I wanted to lose weight AND recover from my habits.


Illogical. ILLOGICAL!

 

[kasmanaft08]

I never have but I find it a lot easier to be polite on the internet. If I'm a party and someone pisses me off I cant "turn off the computer and smoke a cigarette" so of course I'll confront the problem, but on the computer its much easier for me to be not get angry.

This exactly.
I've never been kicked off- then again I can sort of think about what is being said and avoid any body language communication issues.

On Skype, when tired/moody and don't feel like putting the thought into what I'm saying I tend to have more run-ins. I type too fast, maybe.

 

[Marycv]

I've never been kicked off a forum, yet. I think it's great you like to speak your mind, but it depends what was said. You may mean one thing, and they took it as something else entirely. On every forum they make sure everyone is respectful, so sometimes it's best to consider the person's feelings. Even though we may not agree, but saying it in a nice way is best to avoid any problems. What angers me, I've been on some forum, and people are rude, and assume things about me that aren't true. I had some even blocked, and that is why I stopped going to those forums.

 

[Geordie]

I'd been kicked off by my local Wikipedia community, a Singapore-based soccer forum and local autism group... for being myself.

Outside Singapore, though, I think I feel much comfortable. Don't think anyone outside my home country will kick me out.

What's wrong with Singapore? Don't they know my awesomeness? Lol

 

[Ylva]

Never been kicked off a forum, but every once in a while I put up a disclaimer just to make sure people will not get offended. Not "understanding" the logics of offending someone makes it quite hard, but my experience is that something like religion is something people have an issue with for example.

It's kinda silly up to the point where opinions hurt people so much, that you cannot express them. Similarly, there have been people being shot for stating opinions.

With a lot of stuff I sometimes wonder if it even contributes to the argument even. And one thing I mostly will not engage in, is online fights and namecalling... that's one of those things that gets people banned I think.

I am not convinced it is about hurt feelings. I just think it is a sense of entitlement getting people to start pissing contests (which I have learned is an expression meaning "struggling for dominance") and it is about being right, not by actually being right, but by insisting so hard that the other person eventually gives up. If the other person is of the same mindset, these things will get exhausting just to be around. (I can't shut out shouting.)

When I was 17 or so, I said my scars from self injury were battle scars (I now see it differently, I want rid of them) and I was banned for this.
I was also banned from an eating disorder recovery site for expressing that I wanted to lose weight AND recover from my habits.


Illogical. ILLOGICAL!

That does not sound like a very good site. Were they trying to heal people by making them afraid of saying something wrong?

 

[Aalo]

I've been really liked moderator on some forums. Kindest and most reasonable of the "bad modes". (Why do people need god cop - bad cop -race at internet?)

Other than that I've left from many on my own insight on the pressure of not being wanted and for not giving anything good for that specific community. I felt it's batter that I left so others could have continue having their fun. Mostly I feel that people are more accepting through this series of tubes than IRL.

 

[abinun1987]

I've been banned several times over from every forum I've been on. Mostly because I was stressed beyond belief and I was letting it off on the forums... that and the misunderstandings given my AS. I was always the "troll" even though I was just speaking my mind. But I would often butt heads with others simply because I was so stern or quick to correct or deride someone for their stupidity. I can't even remember most of them now but I know that I'm permanently banned from at least 3 or 4 of 'em.

 

[paloftoon]

As I am interested in different things- from growing long hair, to coupons, saving money, etc, I am on several forums, or WAS.... I have gotten "kicked off" of several forums for speaking my mind, my opinions and they are saying I am being "rude" and offending the other people.

Does anyone else have this problem? I don't believe in "beating around the bush" and of course, I always think my opinion is the only opinion and can't understand why people are ignorant and just can't "get it".

So.....has anyone else ever got kicked out of a forum?

With most things in life, there isn't just one answer. You're entitled to your own opinion, but so are others. If you're trying to force your way down people's throats, then this is not appropriate and very selfish. I don't know the context of the situation, but I am just going off of what I see personally off of this thread. So, please don't take any offense. Also take into consideration that if there are multiple forums kicking you out, then it's more likely (not necessarily, but very possibly) you who needs to take a look at yourself (too.)

 

[paloftoon]

When I was 17 or so, I said my scars from self injury were battle scars (I now see it differently, I want rid of them) and I was banned for this.
I was also banned from an eating disorder recovery site for expressing that I wanted to lose weight AND recover from my habits.


Illogical. ILLOGICAL!

Sorry to hear about your experience! Either people on that forum interpreted your post(s) wrong, or they could be very cliquey and close-minded. You can probably find better forums that are more welcoming to consider your thoughts and needs. Don't lose hope! Maybe just try to concentrate on the way you say things possibly, and if you have a go-to person for checking posts, try asking them to check a few postings that might be touchy before you put on if you're not sure. That go-to person may not check everything you say, and eventually you will have to risk posting independently. If the go-to person is helping you a lot, give them cookies or something like that. Food can help keep good relationships!

 

[paloftoon]

I've been banned several times over from every forum I've been on. Mostly because I was stressed beyond belief and I was letting it off on the forums... that and the misunderstandings given my AS. I was always the "troll" even though I was just speaking my mind. But I would often butt heads with others simply because I was so stern or quick to correct or deride someone for their stupidity. I can't even remember most of them now but I know that I'm permanently banned from at least 3 or 4 of 'em.

I'm sorry about your experience abinun1987. Remember, others who are not knowledgeable in one thing are knowledgeable in other things. Even if they don't function well, you don't have to continue to communicate or hang out with those people unless you're being paid to do so. If you're put in a social situation and not getting paid or not getting volunteer experience, etc., then get out of that situation as soon as possible. You really should not think of anyone as stupid even if they are (in some way.) Rather, be glad that those people are around for the most part because most of those people would hopefully not do bad things in our world, and that they would elevate you or I to be more successful in this world possibly.

No matter how right you are or how you feel about a particular thing, if you're deriding other people for whatever, you're being inapprorpriate and a bully.

Sorry if my directness may offend some people. Sometimes it needs be said. . .

Instead, how about everyone else in the universe, you need not be as successful as abinun1987 or me right now!!

 

[AsheSkyler]

As far as I know I've never been banned from a forum, but I'm very quick to block, ban, and get rid of abusive people, and I'll leave a forum that could really use an enema. I could really get behind a discussion, like say, likes and dislikes of a lifestyle. I have no patience for "everybody of this lifestyle sucks and should be slaughtered". Some days I think I do better with grey areas than normal people...

 

[Licorice]

I've never been banned, though I did once receive a temporary ban when I was in a very negative, stressed out place.

When it comes to opinions and getting banned, I advise to just let it go and let other people have their own. Everyone thinks they've come to the correct conclusion, but that doesn't give them the right to be insulting others, putting them down, following them around and starting fights, turning a thread for support into a pissing contest, or anything like that. Things I commonly see people doing. They don't get to make things unpleasant for everyone else over opinions. Humility and respect are important.

 

[JohnH]

Never been banned. I do notice that many forums tend to move towards a certain group-think, and if you have different opinions from the norm for that forum, you'll quickly become the focus of the local Protectors of the Group Opinions.

What inevitably occurs, unless the forum moderation and active core members specifically try to encourage and support a diversity of opinion, is that people who do not conform to the predominant viewpoints end up leaving, so you end up with an echo-chamber of people who all share the same views. Any new arrivals either get sorted into the existing herd, or remain as a minority viewpoint who learn to keep their mouth shut on the sensitive issues, or get run out of town either by general lack of acceptance or by moderator action.