Do you have/suspect you have alexithymia?

[SusanLR]

Interesting.

Those questions seem to assume a whole lot and could easily confuse stoicism with emotional suppression and/or with alexithymia (some people see emotional suppression as distinct from alexithymia, others see it as part of/causing alexithymia, apparently.....link: Constructs often confused with Alexithymia).

I nthink a person could know they are not okay (awareness), know how they are not okay (recognition/identification/understanding of feelings) and be able to describe that others but choose not to for all kinds of reasons.

I found your link to the Constructs often confused with Alexithymia very useful.
It breaks down into various catagories what is and is not.

The short quiz questions that showed Alexithymia, when I review why I answered the way I did
would fit first Stoicism- knowing full well what I feel, but, don't want to let it show to the outward world.
Then as stated in the article: Apathy- not reacting to situations in the world around me.
And also repression to emotions that might arise inwardly from personal traumatic situations.
This line from the Repression definition fits quite well:

"In repression, the patient subconsciously understands the nature of his or her feelings and (sometimes) the cause of those feelings, and this subconscious comprehension generates neurotic conflict. He or she gives out subtle clues about their hidden feelings, by means of sublimated fixations or dream content."

Very interesting read on the seperate catagories.

 

[Bolletje]

I used to have alexithymia, wasn't aware of it until I saw a psychologist for what turned out to be a depression. At that time, I didn't understand that it wasn't normal to just "have" two emotions: happy and not happy.

I learned to identify my range of emotions during my twenties. It's a mixed blessing. On the one hand, people can relate to me more, and I am able to express how I feel. On the other hand, I am way more emotional these days. Some days it feels like I opened Pandora's Box, and occasionally I would welcome the old numbness, to be honest.

 

[Progster]

I remember I was doing CBT (cognitive behavioural therapy), and I was asked to keep a mood diary. I found that hard to do, because I never seemed to have any particular mood, so I ended up putting 'neutral'.

 

[Echo]

Good topic and one that I find as interesting as it is confusing. I'm extremely imaginative and reasonably articulate, but I score highly on the alixithymia tests.

And, I admit I had a difficult time stomaching my results because I considered myself to be reasonably in touch with my emotions.

Here's where it becomes confusing. Is my alixithymia the result of ASD, or a lifetime of being told to shut up, shut down, and suppress my feelings because they were too intense, inappropriate, invalid, etc. etc.??

I'm depressed a lot.

Am I depressed because I was taught to suppress my emotions? Or is it my autistic DNA?

Is alixithymia simply a result of depression?

When I went to a doctor, over ten years ago, I said "Doc, I'm so depressed and strung out, I don't know what to do anymore." She gave me a test for anxiety even though I protested and thought it a waste of time. "I'm depressed, not anxious," I thought. But I took the test to humor her.

She said she didn't think an anxiety score as high as mine was possible.

Over the next few years I unpacked the idea that I'd been anxious since I was an infant. How can i recognize something that has no name? Is never addressed? What color is air?

How high is the alixithymia of people who were raised in near isolation who have no words for what they feel??

See? this topic results in more questions than answers.

 

[DCA]

I decided to take the test at Alexithymie - Emotional Inability.

I scored 120pts "Alexithymia: You show high alexithymic traits. If you are interested in Alexithymia we would be happy to have you as a regular visitor on our pages."

Which I find interesting...

Edit: I think I'm going to bring this up with my therapist when I see him on Monday...

 

[NShoreEndo]

I went to school with Alex I. Thymia. She sat behind me in Physics.

 

[Fridgemagnetman]

What about:

dyslexithymia (the wrong words for feelings).

 

[vividiris]

If I felt angry but instead of expressing anger, just stated "I feel anger for some reason", is that alexithymia? I also can only have one of 2 responses to an extremely sad topic like someone's loved one passing away, for example. I either completely detach, or if I am caught off guard or don't want to seem callous the waterworks will be uncontrollable. But, I am also a very imaginative person, so that doesn't quite fit with the definition. I also consider myself to have a moderate level of empathy which further confuses me. I also don't know whether I truly have ASD or not, but my bf constantly tells me that I do (in an endearing manner, not negatively) and my mother used to tell me that she thought I was autistic when I was young (when she was trying to hurt me).

 

[Gritches]

Formally diagnosed, have alexithymia. Anecdotally, I seem to have trouble describing my pain as well. I've been having issues with pain, and when I'm asked to describe the pain I'm at a loss for words, just like if someone asked me how I'm feeling right now (emotionally). I'm just wondering if alexithymia is to blame for my inability to describe the physical pain I'm feeling.

 

[DissolvedGirl]

This is all very interesting! I'm a recently self-diagnosed aspie. I always thought I'm quite in touch with my emotions but come to think of it, I usually have to write them down in order to process them, I've been doing this intuitively ever since I was a kid. Many times I'll be feeling "mixed feelings", and I usually describe my bad moods as just "feeling weird". I have to really think about it to be sure what exactly I'm feeling, it's usually anxiety (more or less intense) coupled with other feelings.
Other times I'll have these confusing elated-happy-awestruck-but-a-bit-sad feelings about different subjects. Even in nature, every time I feel that joy about seeing a natural scene, I also kinda feel a twinge of sadness or something like that.
Undefined. Mixed up. Feelings are confusing.
I can usually tell how others are feeling by analyzing their whole appearance, tone of voice etc, I usually know right away if they're close to me. But I'll have a hard time actually imagining what's going on inside their head, I'll imagine they experience emotions in a similar way to mine.

 

[tree]

(the wrong words for feelings).

That's a primary aspect of alexithymia.
Not being able to identify feelings.

"...alexithymia...is defined as the inability to recognize emotions and their subtleties and textures."

An inability to recognize something could result in a person misidentifying.
(aka "the wrong words for feelings")
===========

When I was a very young child, my mother said
that I told her "I feel so proud."

She congratulated me.
She wanted to know what I was proud about.

And she didn't understand why, although I said
I was proud, I was crying.

I don't know what I meant, at the time, and
neither did she.

 

[Clueless in Canada]

This seems to be a rather dormant thread but I am new here and exploring. I test very high in alexithymia ( various online tests) but at this point am not surprised because although I've never had a term for it until recently, I have been aware for years that I struggle to identify my feelings. I have to use a lot of logic and examine my behaviours and compare them to my preferences and experiences etc in order to get to that aha moment of understanding or being able to identify what I am feeling. I've put most of my efforts into trying to understand other people and I've become good at it in the abstract but am still not good at reading facial signs of emotion. I am good at telling you what someone will probably feel in a given situation or listing options for potential reactions to a situation.

 

[Sarah S]

Had to vote NO on this one even with all my Mutlible diagnosis im still able to identify & express my feelings & all the rest THANK GOD

Just took said online test linked in this thread by DCA

Heres the result

The result is display on a scale starting on the left (orange) without alexithymic traits up to the blue area with high alexithymic traits.

Points: 57

None to Low Alexithymia Traits: You show few to no alexithymic traits. If you are interested in Alexithymia we would be happy to have you as a regular visitor on our pages.

So dodged that bullet apparently THANK GOD

 

[Clueless in Canada]

Had to vote NO on this one even with all my Mutlible diagnosis im still able to identify & express my feelings & all the rest THANK GOD

Just took said online test linked in this thread by DCA

Heres the result

The result is display on a scale starting on the left (orange) without alexithymic traits up to the blue area with high alexithymic traits.

Points: 57

None to Low Alexithymia Traits: You show few to no alexithymic traits. If you are interested in Alexithymia we would be happy to have you as a regular visitor on our pages.

So dodged that bullet apparently THANK GOD

Wow! I scored 131

 

[Mia]

Alexithymia Test Results: 115. You show high alexithymic traits. Hummm.

 

[Sarah S]

Wow! I scored 131

YICES ! Well if you take a look at my Sig and profile you see i have PLENTY of other NASTY Diagnosis my friend so im not THAT lucky

 

[BraidedPony]

I often don’t know how I feel and didn’t realize that alexithymia was a thing until a couple of months ago.
I will know that I feel bad but have no idea why nor have a more detailed description beyond bad.
Even anxiety, my companion my whole life, I don’t recognize until I get chest pains.
Just knowing that I have alexithymia helps so much because I can try to identify why I feel bad or even better yet get feedback from others. Once a feeling is identified it is much easier to recognize when it comes up again. When someone says...maybe you are feeling such and such? I will immediately know if it’s right or not. It is wonderful to discover a feeling, to have it identified!
I wish I had been diagnosed years ago, my life would have been much different. How do I feel about that? Sad, I think.
If I don’t know why I am suffering, how can I make the changes needed to improve my quality of life?

 

[Clueless in Canada]

YICES ! Well if you take a look at my Sig and profile you see i have PLENTY of other NASTY Diagnosis my friend so im not THAT lucky

So sorry I missed your reply to me. Just stumbled on it now. I guess you are not allowed to be greedy and have all the diagnoses. You have to let me have a few.

 

[Aspychata]

Okay, l can totally repress, l can totally deny my feelings, because sometimes they are painful, the pain starts at childhood, intensifies in teen years(emotional some incest abuse),and then l was a grownup in lockdown mode, dammit, repress repress repress, then l found a way to forget everything, then l came to the surface, was stalked for 4 years of my life, ended up walking a tightrope, psychologist had me open to re-experience teenager trauma, and now l just am back to repressing , god damit everything. But then l met a nice person, and they kindly told me, my reality was really screwed up. Of course, l wanted to know, was this after 18 years of gaslighting? Who knows, maybe Asperger saved me, lol.....

 

[Jojo_LB]

I too only heard of this term recently. But I knew something like this existed. I feel really weird about emotions and expressing them. Sometimes I can express emotions, but only physically (like hugging someone close to me, doing a favor for my closest friends, etc), but I cannot verbalize emotions. It feels really unnatural to me. In therapy, when my therapist asks, "How did you feel about (......)?" I'd say something like, "Um, well, I guess I was glad that this happened, but what was confusing was (.....), and also, it was weird that (......), so I guess, overall, I was sort of glad, but slightly confused and also, um. I'm not sure." lol That's pretty much how it goes when I am asked about how I feel about something. I never offer my feelings up to anyone, either. If I am asked, I try my best. But my "best" efforts are just really weird and awkward lol

Oh yeah, and I scored a 127 on that test.