Different with direct family

[Skye81]

Hi, I just wondered how everyone is around close family..? Do you find it easier than when around others? Are you more relaxed maybe and have more time to think of the right things to ask or do..
Is there much difference from close family to other people?

 

[DogwoodTree]

I look and act waaay more normal and comfortably around my DH and kids. I also do better around my mom and sisters, but more in a survival-instinct sort of way. I put on my "aloof NT" hat with them and try to keep from attracting their attention. With most other people, I just kind of turn myself "off" and try not to impose, because the way I come across isn't at all what I'm intending to communicate, so kinda giving up on that front for a while.

I also have a "work" hat I can put on for work connections/conversations that works pretty well and looks fairly sociable and friendly and productive.

 

[TSS]

I feel better and calmer around my one brother and his wife. Others not so much.

 

[Beverly]

For me family and close friends are the same, I'm relaxed and pretty much can be myself. Anyone else and it's time for the facades.

 

[Skye81]

Thanks for your replies. I feel more comfortable around my husband and children and seem better able to ask about things but I think partly because it could be a whole evening and I've more time to remember. I will babble on and on about things which I know I shouldn't as my husband does seem to glaze over or start wandering off... and it dawns on me that it's a tad long winded..... 8^/
I'm less comfortable with anyone else unless they ask about something I'm happy to talk about. Even my best friend and parents I won't ask about things unless I try really hard. I'm better around very talkative people who will natter on about themselves as well as ask me things. However I do then find all their talking tiring..! (I know how my husband feels..!)
I can stand in a group at the school run and appear normal as everyone chatters and I just speak when I have something important but otherwise I don't listen properly and am 'there but not there..' if that makes sense..!!
I would avoid work meetings if poss but if I had to I would barely say a thing. I never knew what to say especially if we all had to think up ideas. Nope.. blank. !!

 

[watersprite]

I can be almost myself around my kids and one sibling. Otherwise, I can relax and be me when alone and with maybe 3 other people in my life, but not all at the same time.

 

[metalminx24]

I think better but not good. My mum tries really hard to understand me, and our relationship is far better than it was 10 years ago but she's very often baffled by me. I always feel that I've disappointed her, especially as my sister is so successful, so I guess it's not really conducive to being relaxed.

 

[Kademajor]

I am pretty close with my mother, she has some symptoms of aspergers as well, we kinda think the same, my dad on the other hand is another story.

 

[cherryq]

I feel that I can be myself around my mom and two of my close friends. Others just don't understand and aren't as helpful or nice towards me. My dad is starting to understand me a little more and I feel that I can be more of myself, but that's still a work in progress. My sister doesn't know that I might have ASD and overall we aren't close. I haven't really been able to build a connection with her and I'm sure she thinks that I'm rather odd...