Daily planning

[KGA]

Hey! I’m Ksenia and I got diagnosed with ADHD and Asperger nearly a year ago. One of my biggest problems is organizing my day. It puts me in stressful situations every time I feel that it’s too much or I forgot something to put into my calendar, which can lead to a meltdown. How do you handle these kinds of situations? Is it a known problem or is it just me? Thankful for any tips!

 

[AuAL]

I write myself notes of what I need to do today. I put important meetings in my calendar (then have to remember to check my calendar, because I have no notifications set - I hate being interrupted by them. I have recently enabled Emergency Bypass for my wife’s mobile number on my phone because mine is always on silent, and it was getting to be “an issue”.) But I forget to put things like “bring in the milk when the milkman delivers it” in the list of things to do. This becomes “an issue”. It’s not just you.

Do these lead to meltdowns - no. (I do not allow myself meltdowns - I have been masking for so many years…) I think it was @Rodafina who expressed it very well - “mind over matter - if you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter.“ (If it was one of the other fine people on here, my apologies. Names are not my forté, and I can’t see your faces.) So work out what you need to do to get you through your day, to keep you safe, well, and happy. Then do that. And don’t worry, be happy. (Take a bow Bobby McFerrin.)

 

[Rodafina]

I think it was @Rodafina who it expressed it very well - “mind over matter - if you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter.”

I don't think that was me, but thank you for thinking of me. We should give credit to one of the other fine people here, although there are many of those!

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Hello and welcome to the forum, @KGA. I really do think this place is full of many fine people and lots of folks with very good advice. I hope you enjoy it here and find some answers to the questions you have.

 

[kriss72]

I know that problem with planning, I believe it is common for people with asd and ADHD, I think they call it lack of executive function, so you are not alone

I use lists and plans on paper to help me, I currently get outside help to make most of them.

 

[AuroraBorealis]

Hi, I struggle with this too, although it's not so bad that it leads to meltdowns in my case. I've been using normal paper planners since elementary school, and I couldn't live without them. I keep them updated in advance with things I need to do in one specific week, or on one specific day, and when I reach this week/day, I am reminded. If I'm particularly good and don't have to work that day, I try to sit down in the morning after breakfast for a few minutes to sort out what I need to do and what I want to do that day and make myself an approximate plan ("morning", "afternoon", "evening" is usually enough for me) where I put down the things I want to do. It can include "chilling" or something like that on one of the slots, too, it's just to give myself some structure.

Now, this day planning doesn't work every day. I usually am motivated to do this for like a week, then follow a few more unstructured days, and then I get motivated again and do it for a few weeks.
But I always write down important things I need to do in one certain week or day in advance because otherwise I would forget, and since I've been doing it for so long, it's normality for me.

 

[DaisyRose]

Hello, it’s nice to meet you! I try to make notes on my phone or lists of reminders to help me. My mom is good with helping me remember some things while, I do the same for her. If I have appointments, I always put them in my calendar on my phone. It helps to see who has an appointment coming up. I like to sometimes write things down on a notebook and highlight them. The highlighters help to bring attention.

 

[KGA]

Thank you all for the tips! I'm happy to know that I'm not alone with this problem.