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Corrupt A Wish

Granted, but it's a Little Debbie packaged processed blueberry muffin that's been in the back of someone's cabinet since 1993. It still looks fresh and gooey. Up to you.. but I totally wouldn't.

I wish I could go on a whale watching cruise to Alaska.
 
One of the whales you have been watching, beats its fin on your cruise ship and your cruise ship tips over and there are several people injured as a result.

I wish I could fly, high in the sky, free from an airplane and any consequential dangers.
 
You have a tub of alcohol markers, but the tub is so big you have to dedicate an entire room to fit in the tub and the markers get spilled and you have to pick them all up and put them back.

I wish I could eat as much as I would like, without putting on unwanted extra pounds.
 
Granted. But you stop caring about diet culture and silly things like gaining weight and just eat what you want.

I wish I could take a hot air balloon trip.
 
Granted, but you end up in Oz. Now there's some witches having insane drama involving you and like, for some reason, Ariana Grande is there.

I wish I had a weighted blanket
 
Me too! Anyway, all the weighted blankets are expensive. So you just load on the comforters like all the other poors do.

I wish I had some iced herbal tea.
 
Granted. But I'm so warm and cozy under this blanket and the house is so cold, that I don't want to get up and make it.

I wish I had a tall glass of strawberry lemonade.
 
Granted. But it's all syrupy and oversweet. 40 oz, and you have to drink it all in one go.

I wish I had a cuddly dog.
 
Granted, but you have to buy it a shirt, pants, shoes socks, underwear, a coat and a hat.

I wish someone would give me a free car.
 
Granted. But the brakes have gone on it and you have to drive on the motorway.

I wish someone would wrap a big, surprise present for me, in one of those cardboard boxes with the bow on top.
 
Granted. You get to swim with the dolphins, but you see a shark in the distance, moving your way.

I wish I could teleport.
 
Granted but a few times whilst learning how to teleport, you end up in a restroom stall with someone else, or like on the top shelf of the paper towel aisle at the store. You decide it's better just to travel the old fashioned way- by dumbwaiter.

I wish I had a yurt up in the mountains, with a soft bed, and a table covered in art supples, and a happy little potbellied stove for cooking on.
 
Granted. You are happy in your yurt up in the mountains, but then an angry tribe begins to raid your yurt, causing chaos.

I wish I had a great singing voice.
 
Your wish is granted. You now have an amazing singing voice. Chilling. You sound just like a bull elk in autumn.


I wish I could fly and turn invisible whilst doing so.
 
Granted. You are able to fly and this power stays with you, but your invisibility power turns on and then you can't turn it off, so no-one ever sees you again.

I wish for three more wishes.
 
No wishing for more wishes. You do that, and have to wash the dishes. All of them. On earth.

I wish I were a little fox in the forest.
 
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