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Corrupt A Wish

Granted, but it's a Little Debbie packaged processed blueberry muffin that's been in the back of someone's cabinet since 1993. It still looks fresh and gooey. Up to you.. but I totally wouldn't.

I wish I could go on a whale watching cruise to Alaska.
 
One of the whales you have been watching, beats its fin on your cruise ship and your cruise ship tips over and there are several people injured as a result.

I wish I could fly, high in the sky, free from an airplane and any consequential dangers.
 
You have a tub of alcohol markers, but the tub is so big you have to dedicate an entire room to fit in the tub and the markers get spilled and you have to pick them all up and put them back.

I wish I could eat as much as I would like, without putting on unwanted extra pounds.
 
Granted. But you stop caring about diet culture and silly things like gaining weight and just eat what you want.

I wish I could take a hot air balloon trip.
 
Granted, but you end up in Oz. Now there's some witches having insane drama involving you and like, for some reason, Ariana Grande is there.

I wish I had a weighted blanket
 
Me too! Anyway, all the weighted blankets are expensive. So you just load on the comforters like all the other poors do.

I wish I had some iced herbal tea.
 
Granted. But I'm so warm and cozy under this blanket and the house is so cold, that I don't want to get up and make it.

I wish I had a tall glass of strawberry lemonade.
 
Granted, but you have to buy it a shirt, pants, shoes socks, underwear, a coat and a hat.

I wish someone would give me a free car.
 
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