Mr Faramoose
Well-Known Member
hello everybody. Ok. I had 20 jobs in three years, had to give up because of declining health and back problems, I have a 77 year old grandad and grandmother who rarely see my family. But lately my grandad has come to our house to help out with various home improvements/ jobs.
Now, I have been seeing doctors about my back for years, and for the last three years I have been diagnosed with asthma, which is getting out of control now to the point I can never take a deep breath. My grandad, never being around, cannot see how much I struggle at the moment to do every day things.
So, when he comes over this one time, he literally banged on my bedroom window and door, properly hard, to wake me up. He informed me I would be helping him with the house jobs all day instead of laying on my ass all day. I politely told him to go away and explained I have not been well recently, to which he said'' oh come on, a young fit man your age, you're fine, come out now!''
This irritated me, my doctor had told me to get lots of bed rest and not do hard activities in case it set my asthma off, so I ignored Grandad. He came back ten minutes later and shouted through the window'' GET OUT OF BED! NOW!''
I got so irritated I waited until he had gone then snuck out though my window for the rest of the day.
Today [6 months on] I had a spirometery test at hospital so I was in my room until I had to leave for the bus, I went out to get some coffee this morning, and unfortunately grandad was there. He spied me and began talking.
''Hello, how are you? How are you at painting?''
''Not brilliant'' I replied.
''Oh, I'm sure you'd be good if you tried''.
''Um, ok?'' I said, turning to take my coffee back to my bedroom.
Grandad turned to my dad and said, '' Michael, you should get him to strip down the gate, you know, get it all ready then paint it, you can do that can't you?''
He turned to me staring.
I didn't reply, thinking back to the banging on the door incident.
I just feel that my grandparents on this side are controlling, my grand mother never rings or contacts me unless she wants something, and grandad seems to have this idea in his head that all young people should be out working or doing something around the house. But in my eyes, I pay my way out my savings from working, I am nearly 24 years old, I am a MAN, not a CHILD. My time is my time, if I have been told not to do anything physical by a doctor why the hell does this old man think he has the RIGHT to order me about? He knows NOTHING about me! He has this illusion in his head that I'm lazy and refuses to believe I have back and breathing issues, he won't even believe I have aspergers syndrome yet I was PROFESSIONALLY diagnosed five years ago.
The last time I went on THREE buses to see my grandparents, they pretty much just sat down with me and insulted me.
''Oh you're fine you can get a job, you can talk to us fine why couldn't you work at mcdonalds again? Or work in a garage?''
''Your brother is getting on well isn't he, I bet he'll be able to keep a job when he's older [referring to my younger autistic brother]
''You should go to bed at midnight and get up at eight like we do''
''You should help your parents out, why can't you peg out the washing or clean the driveway? That would help your dad out''
Um, I DO help them out? I do loads of cleaning when I feel well enough! I'm on three different inhalers twice a day now I've been in hospital eight times, who the hell do they think they are ordering me about when they never take the time to just LISTEN and realise there's more wrong with me than what they see?
And finally,
''You can't have aspergers you can talk normally''.
WTH???? Seriously if I ever get married or anything I'm not going to invite them, who the hell bangs on a door to a brittle asthmatic telling him to get off his lazy ass????:{
Now, I have been seeing doctors about my back for years, and for the last three years I have been diagnosed with asthma, which is getting out of control now to the point I can never take a deep breath. My grandad, never being around, cannot see how much I struggle at the moment to do every day things.
So, when he comes over this one time, he literally banged on my bedroom window and door, properly hard, to wake me up. He informed me I would be helping him with the house jobs all day instead of laying on my ass all day. I politely told him to go away and explained I have not been well recently, to which he said'' oh come on, a young fit man your age, you're fine, come out now!''
This irritated me, my doctor had told me to get lots of bed rest and not do hard activities in case it set my asthma off, so I ignored Grandad. He came back ten minutes later and shouted through the window'' GET OUT OF BED! NOW!''
I got so irritated I waited until he had gone then snuck out though my window for the rest of the day.
Today [6 months on] I had a spirometery test at hospital so I was in my room until I had to leave for the bus, I went out to get some coffee this morning, and unfortunately grandad was there. He spied me and began talking.
''Hello, how are you? How are you at painting?''
''Not brilliant'' I replied.
''Oh, I'm sure you'd be good if you tried''.
''Um, ok?'' I said, turning to take my coffee back to my bedroom.
Grandad turned to my dad and said, '' Michael, you should get him to strip down the gate, you know, get it all ready then paint it, you can do that can't you?''
He turned to me staring.
I didn't reply, thinking back to the banging on the door incident.
I just feel that my grandparents on this side are controlling, my grand mother never rings or contacts me unless she wants something, and grandad seems to have this idea in his head that all young people should be out working or doing something around the house. But in my eyes, I pay my way out my savings from working, I am nearly 24 years old, I am a MAN, not a CHILD. My time is my time, if I have been told not to do anything physical by a doctor why the hell does this old man think he has the RIGHT to order me about? He knows NOTHING about me! He has this illusion in his head that I'm lazy and refuses to believe I have back and breathing issues, he won't even believe I have aspergers syndrome yet I was PROFESSIONALLY diagnosed five years ago.
The last time I went on THREE buses to see my grandparents, they pretty much just sat down with me and insulted me.
''Oh you're fine you can get a job, you can talk to us fine why couldn't you work at mcdonalds again? Or work in a garage?''
''Your brother is getting on well isn't he, I bet he'll be able to keep a job when he's older [referring to my younger autistic brother]
''You should go to bed at midnight and get up at eight like we do''
''You should help your parents out, why can't you peg out the washing or clean the driveway? That would help your dad out''
Um, I DO help them out? I do loads of cleaning when I feel well enough! I'm on three different inhalers twice a day now I've been in hospital eight times, who the hell do they think they are ordering me about when they never take the time to just LISTEN and realise there's more wrong with me than what they see?
And finally,
''You can't have aspergers you can talk normally''.
WTH???? Seriously if I ever get married or anything I'm not going to invite them, who the hell bangs on a door to a brittle asthmatic telling him to get off his lazy ass????:{
