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Confused about special interests

My special interests are not a hobby, escape, or compulsion/obsession. Instead of using the special interest to avoid something, or escape something, or because I feel I have no choice, the special interests are a source of pleasure and gratification. I'm resilient, which means that when encountering a frustration of my aims, I don't give up readily. I might take a break, or come at the problem from a different direction. So as I see it, my special interests are wholly a positive aspect of my autism spectrum disorder. I just have to avoid boring people by talking about them!
 
Neonatal RRT said:
"what is the definition of perfectionism?
I feel more like a frustrated child than a perfectionist.
Also, I often do too much at the same time. Most people can do much at the same time but not me. This makes me super frustrated at times.
I have poor organizing skills. This is common for aspies."

Perfectionism, for me,...is having some vision of what things should be. The frustration, could be, for example,...looking at an apple, then getting frustrated why you can draw a photographic-like representation of that apple. It could be a home project, it could be something for school or work,...whatever. It is that discrepancy between your vision,...keep in mind many autistics think in pictures and are visual learners,...and the reality before them.

Multi-tasking,...it is a myth,...proven by science. What multi-tasking is,...it is quickly flipping your attention from one thing to the next. Autistics, stereotypically, are known for their intense focus. I am one of those people,...and do not multi-task,...despite what the demands are. I work in a busy, metropolitan hospital,...phones and alarms going off all the time,...getting pulled away all the time. The second I try to focus on more than one thing,...mistakes are made. It may frustrate me, it may frustrate others around me, but NO multi-tasking.

The organizing skills,...I think everyone has a "system" that works for them. Mine is check boxes and lists of everything that needs to get done on a particular day,...especially at work. At home, I need to relax, despite my wife having "something" for me to do, and despite my protests,...and I generally avoid the list thing,...but it does work at home, as well.
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I'm not sure my issue is multi-tasking. When we sing, play piano or dance we have to put many different skills together. I try to practice different skills seperately and then put them together. People often start with many different skills at once.
 
My special interest/hobby for at least 10 years has been photography, in a sense it is also very much an obsession

For the last year since I was laid off from my job I have gone out virtually every day to take photos, including during Covid, I have amassed a rather large portfolio of images during that time, there were times when job search was virtually impossible, now it's a little more possible to do

So recently I will do job search activity in the morning before heading out for a walk, I also walk outside for the exercise and the fresh air, I've likely averaged 5 to 8 km of walking per day for the last year, and of course I'll take a few photos along the way

My point though, I know other photographers in similar circumstances - with every day off - who might go out once a week... Even when I was working full time, virtually every Saturday was spent going for a walk and taking photos

And someone mentioned about neglecting other tasks along the way, I definitely have done that at times
 
A special interest is anything you are especially interested in. It doesn't need to be all consuming. It is just something that holds your attention and you receive pleasure from studying/thinking about/doing it. What makes it special is that you hold it special, not what some officious 3rd party in a white coat thinks of it.

If a third grader can rattle off dozens of dinosaurs, what they ate and when they lived, good on them! I will happily feed them all the paleontology books they can handle.

A special interest could be an avoidance behavior but usually isn't. I know if I am putting off something, I may immerse myself in something else I do want to do because it puts off the activity I really want to avoid. This is avoidance behavior. It is kicking the can down the road, aka procrastination. It is not a specifically autistic trait. It is extremely common among NTs as well.

Even when it isn't avoidance, plenty of people will accuse you of "avoidance" in an effort to get you to do something they think you ought to be doing instead.
 
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Au Naturel said:
A special interest is anything you are especially interested in. It doesn't need to be all consuming. It is just something that holds your attention and you receive pleasure from studying/thinking about/doing it. What makes it special is that you hold it special, not what some officious 3rd party in a white coat thinks of it.

If a third grader can rattle off dozens of dinosaurs, what they ate and when they lived, good on them! I will happily feed them all the paleontology books they can handle.

A special interest could be an avoidance behavior but usually isn't. I know if I am putting off something, I may immerse myself in something else I do want to do because it puts off the activity I really want to avoid. This is avoidance behavior. It is kicking the can down the road, aka procrastination. It is not a specifically autistic trait. It is extremely common among NTs as well.

Even when it isn't avoidance, plenty of people will accuse you of "avoidance" in an effort to get you to do something they think you ought to be doing instead.
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I think you can see it as an aspie thing.
Sure, all kinds of people have avoidance in their lives. You are correct.
Some aspies have a lot of anxiety and frustration. This is why there can be some avoidance.
 
Pursuing my special interests doesn't shut out the world, exactly, but they help me process. After I gave up on therapy I decided to sign up for piano lessons instead (I've played all my life but wanted help with technique and theory). It was a good call. An hour of practice is the most effective tool I have for coping with stuff, and it's a god-tier stim for me. Better than an hour of talk therapy by a lot.
 
I actually want to add—when I said I gave up on therapy, I don't mean to say I think talk therapy is inherently useless; I know many people find it very beneficial. I probably haven't found a therapist I "click" with properly, and combine that with insurance garbage and executive dysfunction and it just wasn't worth it for what I was getting out of it versus what it was costing me. I'm on better insurance now and should probably get back on that horse.
 
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One of my special interests is knitting and related yarn/fiber topics. For me, it can be escapist, also a mental "home" wherever I am. But it also gives me a critical sense of productivity, which I lost when I stopped working. I literally drifted around the house after a bad hospital stay, until I picked up my knitting needles again. In that way, the interest has been therapeutic. It also functions as a focusing and calming mechanism for when I need to sit still and listen. When I really get into researching history and techniques or designing, it looks more like a "normal" special interest, I guess. So I guess my special interest ticks several functional boxes.
 
Why do some of you guys keep saying that "special interest" is an ASD thing? If this is true then all people at the football or dart practice must be diagnosed with ASD or said to show symptoms of it? How do people go deep into a sport if they don't have it as a special interest?
I have heard many people say that people with ASD (some add people with ADHD) focus a lot on the specific interest rather than the social aspects of it.
I see lots of people with ASD focusing on the social aspects of a sport rather than the sport itself. Many people who have NT issues focus on the specific sport. People assume that "special interest" is an ASD thing but I don't agree. It's alot about being human.

Also, I am really not agreeing with this: "special interests makes people calm themselves down!". You know, when I play my accordion I don't experience that calmness and special joy that so many people speak about. I still have my struggles. Everything don't come easily for me. My ASD difficulties don't dissapear just because I play the accordion. Why do so many say that it should? Playing accordion is not like taking a drug (not that I have ever taken drugs). Maybe things would have been different if were savanth or super good at playing the accordion. Some of you have something that you are extremely good at but I don't so I still have my struggles.
 
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In reply to the above:

I think it's part stereotype and part reality. Of course there's plenty of NT's who've made a career from something they've dedicated a lot of time to etc. But with people on the spectrum their interest might be more intense, or "quirky" etc. For my brother it was obvious at an early age where he was drawing Ordnance Survey maps as a child and used to go out in the garden with a broom and mark out lamp post locations and types on streets as he paced up and down the garden.

For me - I'm not even sure I have true specialist interests. Sure, I've invested tens of thousands of hours in video games and collecting music, but I've met plenty of people who are far more knowledgeable and skilled in gaming, and know about music in much more detail than I do.

As for the social aspects. I don't tend to like co-op gaming because people don't play like I do. I recently played Borderlands 2 with a friend and he gave up after a day because I was "playing too fast". Basically I knew the game very well and was speed running to get the best loot and exp etc. He is a real bad stoner, and his gameplay style and attention span was trash. So I think we both frustrated each other.

I'm not good at PVP games as I end up frustrated by how unpredictable people can be - especially in FPS games. This is truly frustrating because when I know I'm fighting an NPC, no matter what difficulty I can calmly shoot them and get some amazing and high quality shots, leading targets and such like. In online FPS I seem to be in "fight or flight mode" and I mainly panic fire.

I play the Phantasy Star series of MMO's (not NGS or PSO2). On there I tend to prefer solo play. But when I do play with others, I enjoy those who just spam the same run again and again. No delays inbetween runs to sit and chat BS in the lobby etc. It's why I tend to prefer to lead a party. Because I can end runs, make new runs and have things running smoothly. There is a "speed running" community within the game which I think I could excel at, but each run has mobs that can be avoided and techniques used that take a long time to master. Personally that just frustrates me. But I do like to be first in and out of each room in a dungeon. So I treat it like a racing game of sorts - even though it's just a 3rd person hack n slash game.

As for music - I've seen it live. I don't like band music live. I know the tempo of a song, and when I hear it live the drummer and songs in general are played too fast. Also the singers very rarely sounded good live. So for me, the whole experience just made me feel frustrated.

So perhaps there is some of the ASD showing with regards to gaming and music. Whilst I might not be a human Wikipedia like my brother is - in terms of knowing specifics, dates and such like. I am a savant with some key areas within a specific hobby/interest.

Ed
 
Raggamuffin said:
I think quirky is a polite way of calling someone odd or weird.

Ed
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Ed, a special interest must be odd according to most people in order for it to be a special interest? Playing the accordion is not weird so it should not be considered a special interest in itself? I'm just very interested. If I had played it ina weird/odd way then it might hve been a special interest? I've been told that music is not a special interest for me. Why can't someone just come forth and define the term "special interest"?
 
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