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Calling Internal Police, hello, pick-up

Discussion in 'General Autism Discussion' started by Aspychata, Sep 19, 2019.

  1. Aspychata

    Aspychata My Art Work

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    Repetitive and restricted thoughts were the two words that stood out about the flyers on the spectrum.

    Being a frequent flyer myself, l have started working on ruminations because l guess it's restrictive also. I felt like it is a unhealthy stim. Anyways does your inner police kick in and say -whoa- no need to go down that path *again*. Or do you go full-fledge and then you get the brain fart a hour later thinking why am l stuck in this unhealthy repetitive or restricted thought process. By the way l have cut back on ruimination except for this week when l was triggered and thought of my abusive ex.

    What point are you at, have you had success?
     
    Last edited: Sep 19, 2019
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  2. Kyou Nukui

    Kyou Nukui music is amazing

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    Probably about 70/30 most of the time, recently. I have times where I am less successful, and some times when I am more successful at being able to halt the rumination before it gets me down.
    I try keeping my mind on the present and near future, on constructive thoughts and realistic plans, so that I don't begin to ruminate on past mistakes in the first place. Having a hobby or happy things going on really helps.
    Sometimes when I don't feel like having positive thoughts about the near future, when I'm fed up or I don't believe there's anything worth doing, it takes flights of fancy to avoid my mind going to the the subject of ruminations. The flights of fancy may be maladaptive daydreaming in fact, but they are still better than being regretful, sad or cringing and re-experiencing some horrible humiliation or hurt. Those repeated feelings are damaging to mental health.
     
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  3. Rectify

    Rectify Well-Known Member V.I.P Member

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    The start for me was realising I was ruminating. That awareness - thinking about the way I was thinking - meant that I could at least attempt to choose differently. So I practice that and am much better at it. Then is the process of self-talk. You're going over this thing again and again but is it getting you anywhere? Almost always I answer no. So then I try to shift my mind to something else.

    If there is any benefit in 'thinking' about something then you could try setting a time limit. After that you can assume you're in danger of ruminating again. My therapist suggested that (or something like that) but I never did it.

    Yay that you have cut out some rumination - positive change. Also, sorry that you've been triggered. It's a slow process.
     
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  4. Fino

    Fino Alex V.I.P Member

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    That post was such a wild ride for me to read, with the analogy and such. :eek:

    I try to stay in the moment as much as possible, because I give myself anxiety by thinking about so many things that are pointless to think about. I'm not very good at remembering to do it! It's hard! :mad:
     
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  5. Aspychata

    Aspychata My Art Work

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    You know repetitive ruminations is redundant. Lol. All start with "r".
     
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  6. Kyou Nukui

    Kyou Nukui music is amazing

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    "If we don't learn from our mistakes we're doomed to repeat them."
    I don't think there's anything more I can learn. I've analysed my many past mistakes so many times each, and I am sure that I do see where I went wrong all those times. :rolleyes:
    And yet I never seem to be able to avoid saying something weird at just the most awkward moment. :confused:
    Especially when I reallyyy need to act normal-brained. :oops:
     
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  7. Aspychata

    Aspychata My Art Work

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    Without our mistakes, we learn nothing. Perfect people are rather boring. I like people who have been in the boxing ring and know life requires spunk. Psychology Today had a story about kids having grit are the ones that succeed later in life. So grab your gritty pool balls and keep moving foward.
     
  8. Thinx

    Thinx Well-Known Member V.I.P Member

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    Yes I have worked on that, actually I ve worked on everything, twice. And repetitively. After many years I realised that despite some progress, some things didn't change and stumbled across Aspergers and autism which more or less explained why. I recall my whole weekend would be spoilt by a chance remark of someone that I would worry over and process but very slowly and negatively.

    I wonder if my bumbling fixation on self improvement was fueled by the autism traits, probably was yes. But it was rather helpful plus I was often in interesting social environments whilst Working On Self. I got a lot more positive in my outlook over the years, I think that was through shedding parental negativities and also understanding that I could change, albeit not everything.
     
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  9. Running Girl

    Running Girl Member

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    Everything that thinx said! The first time i was able to learn to consciously put a stop to a rumination loop was when i found out my daughter was a heroin and crack addict. The ruminations went on for years! They threatened my work, my play, my marriage and my sobriety/recovery. They started to threaten my existence. So i really, really wanted to make it stop. I did, but it took huge mental focus and delibetate mental gymnastics. Repeatedly. But i did it!! I almost never get caught in that particular rumination any more And its been years of freedom from it now. So i know i can get free. But unless the stakes are really high, i find i'm not willing or able (more about willing, i think) to put that kind of energy into changing my thoughts. Then i beat myself up about my lack of willingness! Its not easy being us, right?
     
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  10. Aspychata

    Aspychata My Art Work

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    @Running Girl Thanks for sharing. l will stay to task. Your post has given me hope.
     
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  11. Peter Morrison

    Peter Morrison Well-Known Member V.I.P Member

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    Negative thoughts - all kinds - are damaging to my optimism and positive spirit. I taught myself to limit my negativity to no more than 1 hour per day. I had not been solving problems by thinking about them over and over again, so I chose to jump off the negativity carousel. It took a lot of time to train myself to do that, but I at least made myself aware of the harmful effects of constant negativity. My free thinking brain, the major ingredient in ADD, is without barriers. Switching from negative thoughts to positive thoughts was like sweeping up Halloween confetti - the orange dots go here and the black dots go there. Unfinished business remains in my head all the time. Avoidance doesn't fix things, but I recognized that I needed a break from the negativity. Too much stuff swirling in my head leads to more confusion and chaos. The break from negativity allows things to settle a bit, making it easier to make sound decisions and demonstrate some form of life progress. Temporary fixes can be effective. If you can't cure the illness, at least treat the symptoms.
     
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  12. Aspychata

    Aspychata My Art Work

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    Glad forum posters are discussing this because everyone seems to have been through the washing machine with this. So it is a universal stigma amomg us. And posters are clearly stating they had to go into l will conquer this mode because,because, because. l really was groomed for learned helplessness, so my battle has been long, but l clawed my way out of the fiery pit. But l had the leftover effect of ruims to try to make sense of what l went through. Now l finally realise l can't go deciper bad people's choices on this planet.