Being an awkward teenager

[Misty Avich]

What were your teenage years like for you? I still remember mine so vividly. When I was 13 I felt totally unprepared to be a teenager (I don't mean the puberty part, although I had to learn the hard way that girls 'have to' shave their legs).
But I mean socially I wasn't prepared. I felt like I was suddenly expected to act grown up even though mentally I felt 9-10 years old.
Being a tomboy with ADHD I had a lot of energy to let off, so climbing trees and building dens and getting dirty was what I still liked to do when I was 13-15.
It annoyed me because it seemed that the teenage boys in my family were still allowed to do all that, but because I was a girl I 'looked silly' and was expected to be all clean with a well-groomed hairstyle and putting on make-up, etc. But I wasn't into all that. After all you're still a child at 13-14, and I think we should still be allowed to be kids at that age, as you're a long time grown up.
If I had teenage girls I'd rather they were climbing trees and kicking a football around than messing around with boys and going out in short skirts, etc.

 

[Gerald Wilgus]

As a young teen I was confused and did not know where I fit in. I was well into my special interests. That year My family moved from the inner city to a suburb and I was faced with other kids who I did not know or grew up with. I felt like a stranger and had no success fitting in, also avoiding social events like dances. I started noticing girls and those in my classes who were intelligent. Still, yet, I looked upon them as competitors rather than potential friends or relationships. So, I coped with the tension of wanting to belong and not knowing how, by slowly isolating myself in my studies and interests. We did not have much money and I felt poorly dressed compared to the fashion conscious where I lived so I gave up concerning myself with clothes. I became very self absorbed and selfish. It was a long slog until I regained a decent state of mind.

 

[Outdated]

Times are changing. Slowly, but they're changing. 20 years ago the idea of seeing a women's football game on TV was unheard of, now they're getting better ratings than the men's league.

 

[Outdated]

^^ That's Australian Rules Football by the way. Tayla Harris is one of the more prominent talents.

https://www.womens.afl/

 

[Tom]

I appreciate feminiity but was always drawn to tomboys a bit more. Don't know if it had anything to do with being on the spectrum. Not surprizingly I married a military woman.

 

[Human Avatar]

I feel just awkward now as I did as a teenager. Not much has changed with me .

 

[Forest Cat]

It was a little weird, in primary school I was in my own little bubble in a way and it was nice in that bubble. I kept to myself a lot and played with my stuff. Spent a lot of time outdoors, no internet. But then 7th grade arrived and that's when we started in a new school, new class, new people, new everything. Everything was different. And after that I just tried to hang in there as best I could and suddenly I was 20.

 

[Dadamen]

Like I almost didn't have teenage years. At 13-14 I was still a child, but with some adult-like interests since young age. At 15-16 I had a short teenager burst and became more sociable. At 17-18 started feeling like adult with some childlich caracteriatics and looking forward to end those teend.

 

[Misty Avich]

I don't feel nearly as awkward as I did when I was a teenager. I'm in my 30s now and socially life seems easier and I think it gets easier as you get older, as most people's standards go down.

As a teenager the social standards didn't always make sense. You had to be into the trending music to be accepted by your peers. I remember when I was 15 I got into 60s and 70s music, but being so it was 2005 the other kids shunned me because of having a 'Super 70s' or 'Chas & Dave' CD in my Walkman instead of Justin Timberlake or 50 Cent. But being an adult it's more acceptable to be into whatever music you want and don't have to follow the trend. My NT cousin went to an 80s festival last year even though she grew up in the 2000's. When she was a teenager she wouldn't be seen dead listening to 80s music.

I had to specifically be told what was cool and what wasn't when I was in the first 3 years of my teens. I remember when my sister first got a mobile phone, I was 13 and really wanted one too but my parents couldn't afford one for me too (plus they said I didn't need one yet because I didn't really go out anywhere without them, only to school). I had an old toy mobile phone that I pretended was my mobile phone, but when my sister's friend was coming my mum told me not to let her see my toy mobile phone in case she'll laugh. If my mum hadn't told me that I probably wouldn't have known.

I remember another time when I was 13 my dad was having a bonfire and I made up a game to play around the fire. My brother and his friends came along and I heard my brother mutter to his friends "what the f's wrong with her??" like he was embarrassed of me. My brother is supposed to be on the spectrum too but he never struggled in his teens. He was shy but still managed to be accepted and hang out with the coolest boys in his class.

 

[Dadamen]

I don't feel nearly as awkward as I did when I was a teenager. I'm in my 30s now and socially life seems easier and I think it gets easier as you get older, as most people's standards go down.

As a teenager the social standards didn't always make sense. You had to be into the trending music to be accepted by your peers. I remember when I was 15 I got into 60s and 70s music, but being so it was 2005 the other kids shunned me because of having a 'Super 70s' or 'Chas & Dave' CD in my Walkman instead of Justin Timberlake or 50 Cent. But being an adult it's more acceptable to be into whatever music you want and don't have to follow the trend. My NT cousin went to an 80s festival last year even though she grew up in the 2000's. When she was a teenager she wouldn't be seen dead listening to 80s music.

I had to specifically be told what was cool and what wasn't when I was in the first 3 years of my teens. I remember when my sister first got a mobile phone, I was 13 and really wanted one too but my parents couldn't afford one for me too (plus they said I didn't need one yet because I didn't really go out anywhere without them, only to school). I had an old toy mobile phone that I pretended was my mobile phone, but when my sister's friend was coming my mum told me not to let her see my toy mobile phone in case she'll laugh. If my mum hadn't told me that I probably wouldn't have known.

I remember another time when I was 13 my dad was having a bonfire and I made up a game to play around the fire. My brother and his friends came along and I heard my brother mutter to his friends "what the f's wrong with her??" like he was embarrassed of me. My brother is supposed to be on the spectrum too but he never struggled in his teens. He was shy but still managed to be accepted and hang out with the coolest boys in his class.

Already at university I see much more acceptance than it was in high school.


Those teens are definately least autism friendly time of the life. Although adulthood brings more responseabilities, socialising is somewhat easier. Even if you wont make real friends, you will more likely be accepted than rejected.

 

[Outdated]

In some ways circumstances forced me to grow up a lot quicker than most people yet in other ways I was much more childish. I had responsibilities from age 12, was driving a car (illegally) at 14.

As soon as I turned 16 I started working. Money, cars, girls, parties, beaches and surfing, drugs and alcohol. I seemed to stick at that age until I had a big burnout in my late 30s.