I think that most of us who were diagnosed as adults have had little trouble accepting a diagnosis. Most of us have been looking for answers most of our lives, and finally got one that helps us navigate the world around us a little better.
I will admit to a brief time, about a week or so after I received the results of my assessment, when I read and re-read the 10 page document, alternately thinking "that's me" and "no, that can't be me". Eventually I accepted that yep, that's me.
Maybe this isn't funny, but I think we'd need to hear from the elusive "wife diagnosed" guys out there, who refuse to acknowledge that there is something wrong with them.
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My husband I would say: loosely accepts I am an aspie, but most of the time, finds it a heck of an inconvenience and uses it against me. It is VERY hard talking to him about it, because he has the amazing ability to make me feel very small and stupid and what comes out of my mouth, seems so blasted weak, like I am trying to convince MYSELF and I hate that feeling.