Anyone Else Forgetful When It Comes To Names?

[Katleya]

Well, yes, I suppose special interests will definitely play their part.
But given the love for name tags previously expressed, there's a good chance that seeing names is more effective than hearing them.

 

[abby normal]

glad i'm not the only one who struggles with names and faces and places.

 

[Southern Discomfort]

I think I fall into the average percentile in this. I'm fairly okay with names. Sometimes it's terrible, I've forgotten a name of a friend at my peer group after not seeing him for about 3 months. But generally I'm okay with names.

 

[cherryq]

I'm bad with both faces and names, so it's a real problem sometimes. If I see someone I know, but they're in a place I am not familiar seeing them in (i.e., someone I know from church is at the climbing gym), I have a 50/50 chance of remembering their name or face in the moment. Usually someone recognizes me first, talks to me (and I'm wracking my brain trying to figure out if I know them and from where), and either halfway through the conversation or even hours afterwards, I'll suddenly remember their face and know that I recognize them from somewhere or I will suddenly remember their name (if I already knew I recognized them from somewhere else). I have a lot of awkward encounters because of this...

 

[invisible]

I'm terrible with names. Usually I can't quite hear what they are, and even if I do manage to catch someone's name I can never remember and recognise faces anyway so I can't associate the name with anything.

 

[CrankyGoesToHollywood]

I've always been awful at remembering names but I can remember a string of numbers from 30 years ago.

 

[janie]

Names stalk me like arch nemesis that chide me.

I forget names,
I forget faces,
unless they strike me
somehow
and they get filed
in the photo archive.

I also misname people.
I meet X1 J2.
My nero net saves
name as J8 B3.
One a file has
been encrypted
and saved,
its forever, baby.

People don't like it
and it extinction
of forever hailing
X as J
long since chaffed patience.

It frustrates me too.
I try to explain it to J.
J, your J, not X.
I can send you the link.

People like it less
when after getting
their name wrong
again
for years,
I call X
J
again,
because that's
their name
and
I try to explain
why it makes sense
to me
really slowly,
in simple,
easy-to-understand
words,
because
all I want to do
is that J gets
that this means
I love them.

J then calls me
a mean name,
Patronizing ______.

I am no good with names.

 

[ilovetochat87]

Is anyone else really forgetful when it comes to names? I mean, I've never been any good with names. I usually have a hard time remembering people's names unless they're someone I see on a daily basis. And even then, I still tend to call people by the wrong name. Or I just flat out forget the person's name all together, which makes for an awkward dance of me trying to avoid asking them, "I'm sorry, but what's your name again?"

I'm not sure if this could be spectrum related or if I just have a memory lapse when it comes to people's names, but this isn't getting any better. It's gotten to the point where I'll meet or be introduced to someone at work and as soon as they say their name, amid the handshaking or questions of what I do or where I'm from, I immediately forget the person's name that was just mentioned a few seconds ago. And no matter how hard I try to remember, I just draw a blank.

I've tried doing the name association thing where you associate a person's name to something memorable like a tv personality or cartoon character, etc. But that doesn't work if I can't even recall the person's name in the first place. Does anyone else experience this?

it is spectrum related. for sure. Its called Face Blindness. but i watched a facinating 20/20 special on the subject and the people studied had no disability but had Face Blindness. The reason it happens is that we see the face jarbled up. there is a Face Blindness test online that tests if you are a candidate for being of Face Blindness. it shows a face of a celebrity bc they are someone we see daily in the media. they cant use our loved ones bc they dont know our loved ones so its not possible to generate that in a general test everyoen can universally use. but they show a celebrity and we have to write in the box the persons name and if we dont know, we leave blank. after each one it tells us the answer and we see if we got it right or wrong. At the end it asks how many did we actually know or not and it tells us how many count as face blindness. i counted high. I also took an alexethemia test. try that one too. that is one that many on the spectrum fail too. of course ppl with lower functioning autism will undoubtedly fail but its more for Aspergers who are able to understand more to see if they do or dont. I scored high on that too. But we see things upsude down.

like they have funny tests online to be silly where they show angelina jolie where her face is normal but her lips are upside down and her eyeballs are both switched upside down and you have to see if you can still recognize who this celebrity is. many can tell bc she is the only celebrity with those distinct lips so it easy to still pick her out. But most celebrities are virtually undetectable with their features upside down. like the face is rotated upside down but the eyes and nose and lips are normal. or whtever have you. we see things that way even if we dont know it so we cant tell one fart from another.

There was a lady on the 20/20 special/test who looked at a picture of her own adult daughter who she just saw that morning and she has no idea who the woman in the photo is. and almost cried when she was told that it was her daughter.

If someone comes up to me now and says "hey do you remember johnny from high school? he was in our science class." I say "why?" they say "well I ran into him at the plant store when i was picking up those daisies I told you about and he asked me about you" I think and think and say "I remember a johnny in high school. I remember one with that name sitting behind me but I cant picture what his face looked like without getting out the year book" so i get the year book out and look him up and immediately im like "oh Johnny!! Ya! That kid. I remember him now." or if they say "do you remember this kid?" and show me a picture. Id be like, "vaguely but not really. whats his name? I kinda sorta remember something about him. he looks kinda like one kid I had in algebra class but I cant think of his name to save my life." so we go searching in the year book for that face and I find it and Im like "oh!!!!! corwin! thats right. He was the kid in my algebra class. wow! his name escaped me! holy crap how did i forget his name!?" but it happens ALL THE TIME! now I cant forget my mom or dad or sister or my main friends like sabrina or kristine or chris. I know chris from highschool and spent so much time with him that i cant get my brain to forget him or same with kristine for same reason and sabrina is my friend since 3rd grade so same thing and my mom and dad and sister. i havent forgotten them, idk why. it should happen with anyone for me which is what is said to be for faceblindness bc we see everyone upside down from the way their features are set so its like a puzzle to us. but those people i dont ever and havent ever forgotten so far.

what has happened to me with them is I got to call them and I forget in one nanno second who it was i was calling and i cant remember to save my effing life. It feels like when you have amnesia and everyone wants you to remember who you are and you say "susan? no that doesnt sound right. carol? no thats not right either. annie? no this is not right!! dam* *t! I should know who I effing am!!!" and you cry! its painful physically to try to remember. its exhausting and draining bc you literally do not remember like you dont exist. but you know you have to. You know you are someone you have to be. you cant be a non person. then how would these people be able to see you?? You feel stupid and want to call yourself dirogatory names bc you feel stupid. like you dont just forget yoruself. whats wrong with yourself???! but this is exactly what Face Blindness for me anyway. i cant speak for all sufferers but for me its that way anyway. EXACTLY THAT WAY!! what in my brain is going on that makes me forget these people i know and see daily? like when some people have strokes they suddenly speak latin or greek and they never spoke it or learned it in their life!! but they lose their speaking language of english or whatever they speak from birth. how in the heck does that happen?

But like I said the thing that does happen is I go to call my mom for instance which this very thing has happened to me, and in one nanno second i forget what im doing and put the phone down forgetting that i had to call someone and am destracted by the tv. like amnesia happened and made me forget my mission. then I spark in my mind and remember i was calling someone but dont know who. and i sit a second and still cant remember and it feels like im stupid. so I look through my phone book and see names "abby cell, alishia cell, ashley cell, bailey cell, bobs cell, bobs work, bobs house, caitlins cell, caitlins house, etc. on down and i come to ICE MOM CELL (for in case of emergency) fyi anyway I am like OH MY GOD!!! THATS IT! THATS THE PERSON I WAS TRYING TO CALL!!! and relief sweeps across me and i almost pass out from excitement and that heavy relief! it helps when I forget who Im calling or texting before i make the text or call to look in my phone book and go alphabetically down the list of everyone in there and even tho i dont know who i am looking for, I know I will know when I see the name. idk how it works that way but it does.

if i am watching a movie tv or something I see an actor that i recognize and i say "wasnt that chick in the pink dress and curls in another movie?" like that was the dumbest thing i could say bc that woman was in many movies. every actor in this movie has been in another movie. like be more specific. but I am thinking I just saw a movie a couple weeks earlier and it had the actress who is in this movie wearing a pink dress. the other movie had her playing a zookeeper. but i cant think of the actor to look her up to see if she was or not so i want to look up the other movies cast. but cant think of it either. so i rack my brain to think of whoever else was in that zoo movie that i DO remember and i think oh sigourney weaver so I go looking for her and the list of movies she was in and find the zoo one and then look up the cast and find who I am thinking of and find out that the girl im thinking of was not in the movie but a girl who looks kinda like her with similar height and similar length/color hair. It confuses me. i get so worked up on it and its not even who I thought. that is an unfortunate part of Face Blindness for me. i do sometimes have a similar scenario and am thinking of the right person. but not always. I get people confused.

I think all cars and trucks look the same. idk if that is a similar condition to it or not but it seems like it. my mom used to drive a sonata which i love love loved!! I was driving with her once bc i dont drive so she took me to a dentist appt, and I saw a white prius car drive past us and I said "look mom! that white car next to you looks like your car" she said "ummmm....noooooo, but thaaaaannkk yoooou?" *totally perplexed face* she was kinda confused. the thought was nice but not quite. not all white cars are the same. I dont know why I cant get one white car from another. when a coworker picks me up for work they say "im in a Sadan" im like "idk what that is. idk one car from another. what color is it? that more helpful. but If i still cant find it look for me looking confused at what im supposed to be looking for and wave out the window"

 

[janie]

ilovetochat87!

Talk about filling-in-the-blanks!

Your response led me to read other information about face blindness.

I remain dazed that other people understand these ideas I have always thought signaled my brokenness.

Prior to this forum, my only reinforcers about my cognitive presentation have been either simply negative or wholly punitive.

 

[RiverSong]

I know a few here mentioned being able to recognize a person by their voice. I'm surprisingly good at this!

I can pick a person out by their voice in a heartbeat. I can remember and recognize a voice I've heard before almost instantly but remembering a name or trying to recall and recognize a face is a real problem.

I didn't know about Face Blindness/Prosopagnosia until very recently. That along with Alexithymia and executive functioning are all still new concepts to me. I'll definitely look more into these areas.

Thanks everyone!

 

[janie]

NOVEL: "I can pick a person out by their voice in a heartbeat," RiverSong. Like a voice print, you identify/create distinct sound files for people.

 

[RiverSong]

NOVEL: "I can pick a person out by their voice in a heartbeat," RiverSong. Like a voice print, you identify/create distinct sound files for people.

Well, pretty much. It's like my brain can easily connect a voice with a person but not a face or a name. I can remember immediate family members' names but not other relatives or the majority of other people. And I've had trouble recognizing both family and other people when I'm out and about.

Like, I can pick my dad's voice out immediately but I failed to recognize him when he met me at the airport recently. I didn't recognize his face at all but once he spoke, I instantly made the connection that it was him. And he didn't look differently from the last time I saw him either, so I thought it was odd that I didn't recognize him at first. I guess this is where face blindness comes in.

I've also done the same with my brother where I didn't recognize him at a venue but I knew his voice and my boyfriend - the same thing happened at the airport. I even do this with people I see on TV. I don't know how many times it's happened when I can't place a name or face but I know an actor simply by their voice.

 

[janie]

I sit in moments like this. A pause to consider something read or said a moment of joy. Your post makes me happy that whatever else brains of our elk do, they deliver what you need. See with your ears RiverSong. It's a thing of beauty.

 

[RiverSong]

I sit in moments like this. A pause to consider something read or said a moment of joy. Your post makes me happy that whatever else brains of our elk do, they deliver what you need. See with your ears RiverSong. It's a thing of beauty.

Yes, I suppose that's true! Thanks.

 

[Lookinator]

Honestly, i thought it was just my problem, but i really i didn't know it has to do with Asperger's. I have this problem, i don't remember names of people i usually meet, even if i try, i don't do the best. So sad.

 

[ilovetochat87]

A lot of people on the spectrum have the worst trouble with remembering people's faces and their names like when I was being tested for aspergers they asked me, "do you know who the current president is?" it was back when Obama was the president and I was 15 now I'm 28. Anyway I said "yes I can't remember his name I know he's a black guy he's got big ears and he's big in the media for having big ears. His wife is a fashion guru got two daughters that live with them I just can't think of his name" and she said "wall, do you know the President before and I said "oh God yes, hang on." and then it to me and I said "George W. Bush Junior!" and she said "good now can you remember who the current president is?" and I said "no not for the life of me" and she said "Obama" and I said "yes!" I was so excited because it was driving me nuts but I couldn't think of it but I knew I knew it.

I did a face blindness test online to test if I had that because people that have trouble with remembering faces and names are said to be face blindness. They give you a test on like let's say a celebrities face and you have to write in the box below what that person's name is and then when you click next or go or whatever they tell you the name and you don't get yes or no or right or wrong you just have to make a mental note or write it down for yourself if that was correct or not and then they go onto the next celebrity face and you have to put the name down and then when you click the button it puts the name for you and you see if you were correct etc. and if you don't know you leave it blank and then at the end they have the results such as if you got a score between this and this ur result is.. And I scored face blindness so yeah I don't see the faces turn upside down and get garbled much like your typical face blindness but I think that I still qualify because I cannot remember a person's name to save my life. If somebody said do you remember Johnny from high school I would be like "Johnny who I have to see his face to know who you're talking about" and then I go "oh yeah that kid!" Or if they show me a face and they ask me to identify who he was it was from high school I recognize the face but I couldn't tell you what his name is but I know I know that kid because he sat behind me in biology and we were partners on several projects but I couldn't remember his name and then they say "Johnny" and I'm like "that's the name!"

sometimes I will swear to God when I'm watching a movie for the first time and I recognize or think I recognize an actor or actress that I've seen them before I will swear to it . And in aspergers thing I do is obsess over this thinking and being sure that I've seen whoever in the movie before like we're watching a movie and I say "that guy in the black tuxedo where have I seen him?"'and my mom says "I don't know be quite we're watching the movie." And I will say "but I have to figure it out where else I've seen this guy" and she says "honey, that is an actor he's been in many movies I'm sure. sometimes you'll find an actor that's first time and this is the first movie or something but most of the time if you recognize an actor it's because you've seen several movies with that actor" but I'm thinking of a specific movie and I recently saw it with the actor and its driving me nuts until I figure it out so I type in the movie I'm thinking of because obviously I can't think of the guy to save my damn life and once I type in the movie I can see the cast list and then once I see the guy I will recognize it immediately and then I can see if that's the guy and what his name is and a lot of times I find out it wasn't who I thought it was it was. Its somebody that looked like them and then I'm over myself because I figured out what I wanted to know. I would think that is kind of a trait of face blindness that causes me to not be able to pinpoint people very well .

But yes the reason that we have trouble with remembering people is because of most likely face blindness there's something similar to face blindness I can't think of the name of it and I saw it once when I was researching face blindness several years ago it was in the same Wikipedia thing or something whatever I was on it was in the same thing and it said that face blindness is the difficulty recognizing faces and then whatever this other thing was was the difficulty putting a name to a face and I can't remember what that's called but I can't seem to find anything on that sense but they're supposedly I think is a thing where you can't remember a name to a face like face blindness is can't put a face to a name.

They did a 2020 special where a group of people without a disability they just happen to have face blindness which to me is weird if they don't have a disability but that might be considered a disability in itself, I don't know but these people had pictures of celebritiesand they also had pictures of their familiesand loved onesandeach time they were given a face they were told if it was a celebrity or their family they were just given the picture and they couldn't tell you the picture wasto save their lifeand one lady said I don't know who that is I don't know that person I guarantee I don't know that person and the 20/20 specialist said that your daughter. and the poor old woman was crying she couldn't believe that she didn't know her daughter and she thought she should know her daughter but explained to her that her brain mixes up the features much like somebody with dyslexia gerbils letters and instead of saying ask they say aks. much like that the person with face blindness messes the order of the facial features like the Mouthel be upside down or they'll get the left and right I on the wrong side of the body or the nose will be upside down something they'll be some kind of disorientation with the facial features and therefore they don't recognize the person even if it's their daughter Deibert out of their stomach they should recognize that they have them in your stomach for nine months and then they physically burst that person out of themselves and they held that person and they said that person they raise that person 20 years how did they not know their own child when looking at them how is it that you look at your daughter and somebody from a totally different country side-by-side and you don't know which ones which? that's baffling but the woman couldn't do it . And I don't think there's anything yet to fix the fact that she couldn't seeher own daughter because she would have dyslexia innocents with the facial featuresshe would kind of garbled and facial features in her mind where the lips are upside downor she would have the nose upside down or maybe both and therefore it appears to be somebody stranger to herbecause she's not recognizing those things. Hopefully one day they come up with a cure for thatI can imagine that's completelyembarrassingwhen you stand next to your daughter and you forget themlike maybe yougo into a storeand your child doesn't want to gotheydecide to sit outside and wait while you go in the store and you spend a significant amount of time in thereand then you come back out to see your child sitting on a bench and you don't remember where your child islooking right at them and you don't rememberbecauseyou had a momentwhere youforgot the features of your childandyou call them on the phone and say where are you and they tell you look straight ahead I'm on the bench and you feel embarrassed, how did I forget my child and I looked right at her? That's got to be embarrassing.