Hi, I am not in your area, but in UK.
Are you aware that there is a parent -2-parent support through the NAS. You might ask for someone in your area and maybe they could find someone? You would need to call their helpline and leave a message, they would get in touch within a few days.
There is also a lot of good advice and support through SOS!SEN and IPSEA, Ambitious about autism and Special Needs Jungle.
My elder daughter had a Statement of SEN in the last year of primary. She too is very bright and high functioning. She went to a mainstream grammar school. It was a first in that particular school. With the statement and full time 1:1 it worked well. The school had very strong pastoral policy and non bullying culture. School cracked down on any bullying hard and fast. They also organised buddies and mentors. Buddies are class peers who are confident, independent (would not bow to ableist pressure), introverted, patient and supportive. Mentors are basically 6-form girls who earned 'leadership' brownie point for UCAS by mentoring my daughter.. Basically appointed volunteer girls to act as friends and being supportive. They were not 100% like real friends, but the closest thing to that. One of them is a real friend now. As part of the statement there was ASD specialist teacher and she recommended and did autism training amongst the girls, to explain, to manage the message in a positive way. To stop rumours and normalise her autism. This was massively helpful. My daughter was happy.
So, you need a basically good school with good pastoral care and responsible non ableist management so they would create and enforce the inclusive no bullying culture, have the training for peers and appoint buddies...
You said your daughter is clever. In principle this is not a barrier for getting support with autism. The support you need is with social and emotional stuff, so unrelated to grades. In my experience, every new year brings new challenges, as demands grow, so it is always good to get started on SEN support, so it would be available when /if academic challenges appear. Those SEN charities would help with the process of getting provisions.
I heard a lot of stories of bright autistic teens coping OK in primary and first years of secondary, but developing anxiety and mental health problems to the point of school refusal or exclusion. It is not rare that the whole mainstream placement explodes just at GCSE or A levels. So support is needed.
I hope it helps.
