Advice on a situation

[phil1980]

Hello,

I am new to the community and new to being diagnosed with Aspergers. I have only recently, within the past 5 years, been officially been diagnosed and only now found (hopefully) a psychologist that can help but I don't get to see her that often. So I am hoping that a place like this can help in between visits, if nothing else, to help make me feel like I am not the only one like me.

I have had the same job for going on 2 year and had the same parking spot for the entire time, recently one of the employees that I work with has started, within the past 2 days, to park in the spot that I normally park in, and well to be honest, it is driving me crazy. My wife, bless her heart, is a neurotypical person and does not understand what it is like for me to have my daily routines, such as parking in the same spot. I do not know how to deal with this, and it is driving me crazy. I know that if I bring this up (like I did when I talked to my wife) that they will think it is "pety" and will certainly not understand why I am getting upset of a parking spot.

I am looking for help and assistance in how to handle this situation as it is really bugging me. Thanks in advance.

Phil

 

[Suzanne]

Hello phil1980

You really have entered a lovely forum and for what you are seeking, wow you have come to the right place.

I, personally am not officially diagnosed as yet, but am hoping to, soon enough.

I get you so much with routine and my husband is a neurotypical too and just does not get my needing routine and will tend to laugh at me.

I can only think that you should get there earlier, so that you get to that parking spot before the other worker.

We have a wood fire as our heating and I have a particular routine that I like to go by and when my husband takes over, because of being here, he will mix kindling with harder stuff and that drives me mad and I even say with an annoyed voice: why did you put kindling in with the other woods? He will say something like: oh it was only a bit, no big deal and I just get so angry by that and abruptly walk back to the pile and remove the offending kindling and put were it belongs. Of course my husband thinks I am mad, but my head is clearer for being organised.

Also goes with my kitchen. Everything has its place and that includes the cloths I use!

 

[toothless]

hi phil welcome to AC,i hope you will get something out of it like i have.

i can totally relate to the parking spot issue,i go absolutely mental when people park directly outside my dads house mainly because i despise with a passion; change but also because im physically disabled,use a rollator/walker and cant walk far.
i also despise people who are able bodied/able minded and park in disabled bays without a blue badge [a UK disabled parking permit],it gets me ranting every time i see it and most support staff or my family ignore me as theyve heard it all before,hey but thats another issue.

its good youve found AC,in my opinion its the best most accepting autism forum on the internet and ive been trying different ones for over 14 years.

 

[Crossbreed]

The real world is messy. We like it orderly (and so order it wherever we can). One principle that I have come to terms with is The Law of Diminishing Returns. While its implications are less-than-perfect, factoring it into my ordering process will give me the best results available at any given time. It generally includes having a "Plan B" and "picking my battles."

 

[OkRad]

Hello,

I am new to the community and new to being diagnosed with Aspergers. I have only recently, within the past 5 years, been officially been diagnosed and only now found (hopefully) a psychologist that can help but I don't get to see her that often. So I am hoping that a place like this can help in between visits, if nothing else, to help make me feel like I am not the only one like me.

I have had the same job for going on 2 year and had the same parking spot for the entire time, recently one of the employees that I work with has started, within the past 2 days, to park in the spot that I normally park in, and well to be honest, it is driving me crazy. My wife, bless her heart, is a neurotypical person and does not understand what it is like for me to have my daily routines, such as parking in the same spot. I do not know how to deal with this, and it is driving me crazy. I know that if I bring this up (like I did when I talked to my wife) that they will think it is "pety" and will certainly not understand why I am getting upset of a parking spot.

I am looking for help and assistance in how to handle this situation as it is really bugging me. Thanks in advance.

Phil

Welcome, Phil! Do not worry. You will find a lot of people here who totally get you. I am still amazed how many people feel like I do even though they all have their own ways, too.

About parking, I get that.I am not sure wh at to offer for advice because I doubt they would understand. My option would be to go as early as possible to get there first even if that meant a long wait till work started.

I saw a Mad Magazine long ago with Sergio Aragonés cartoon. He has this guy taping off a parking space like a crime scene. He looks like an official. I can't recall if there is even a guy lying there, looking dead.

Last scene is his wife rolling up in the car and he dusts himself off, Aragonés-style with flecks flying and the "dead" guy gets up, and Walla! A place to park! I can't recommend that, but you could get creative?

I, too, always park in the same place. In fact, I lived with a family a while ago and the "cherished" place to park was, of course, under the carport because it was by the door. If you had groceries, it was hard to carry them in the rain and snow to the door if you got the other places.

Guess what? Even if it was WIDE OPEN, I still parked in my place. I wanted to leave it open for the younger kids that were in the home, for one thing. But also, it felt so much like a luxury. I am like an austere medieval monk.

In the end, it just felt weird to park elsewhere. I bet it did have to do with my autism, come to think of it.

 

[phil1980]

Hey, sorry for the late reply. Life caught up with me and things have drastically changed for me. I just wanted to say thank you for the replies they helped out greatly.