1. A little background info: I seldom use Facebook. My son made an account for me without me knowing it & I began receiving message alerts. Fortunately, most of them were from my 6 yr old niece (though her parents' account). Almost 35yrs ago, an Inuit exchange student from the far north came to stay with my family (my 2 parents & my brother) for 3 weeks. Afterwards, my brother got to go up north & stay with his family. He was younger than I but older than my brother. We got on reasonably well. The years passed & a couple of years ago, I got a Facebook friendship request from his daughter. Every now & then, she'd message me & I'd reply.
2. Fast forward: she is in her early 20s, unmarried but with 2 kids (age 2 & a 6 month old baby) from her boyfriend who is also Inuit. She began posting distressing messages about the rows they'd get into. These would become unwieldy & altogether out of hand. He drinks heavily & becomes very violent. Last Friday evening, she uploaded a photo of the aftermath of one of his drunken rages. She had a black eye & a gash across her eyebrow where he'd smashed a beer bottle & slashed her in the face with the broken edge of it. The kids were there at the time. She had to get stitches BUT she LIED to the Dr. about what had happened.
A family member saw the photo too & alerted local police. When they got to her (it is a very small isolated reservation) she lied to the police too (!) Over the weekend, he continued drinking & raging. Other family members of hers began posting that she needed to get to hell out of there & away from him with her kids. She was posting messages about how terrible things were at home with him & how he was abusing her emotionally & physically.
Two nights ago, he blackened both her eyes in a drunken rage. He also hit the 2 year old & she cried herself to sleep. He threatened to murder her. She is not originally from this particular reservation, but from another that is also up north beyond the tree line in the tundra. Her boyfriend has an 'issue' with the fact that she is not a local girl & he uses that as a pretext for mistrusting & maltreating her (makes no sense whatsoever). This time, I got in contact with Montreal"s Native Women's Shelter & got advice from them: I was at a loss as to how to help & what resources there were for her. They gave me the # for her local police advised me to call them. I did that & the police rushed over. They followed up with me.
Apparently, she lied to them again!!! Even with the damning photos from Facebook & all her posts, it does not constitute 'evidence' because she could claim someone else had hacked her account & made fraudulent use of it. The cop knew damned well that she was behind the posts BUT since, when they got to her home, she was unwilling to admit anything & she lied to them again about her injuries, there was nothing they could do. The cop said that they had a long history about that boyfriend & his drunken rages & violence. Her aunt has notified social services up north & hopefully they will be able to do something.
On the one hand, I am furious at that guy for being a violent, abusive drunken @$$#0le but I am also mad at her. She is choosing her obsession with that rotter over the safety & well-being of 2 babies. They can do nothing for themselves & she is not protecting them. She needs to have a guy (ANY guy) in her life in order to feel whole. Social services must take those kids away from her before he kills them as he has threatened to do.
I have done what little I can from so far away, but I am mad at her for her complicity in endangering her children's lives. As a teacher with extensive psych & social education, I know that women often lie to protect abusive men & they keep going back to them. Sometimes this is out of fear of what the guy will do, since the police can only hold an abuser for 2 days, then they must release him. Many of these men go straight back to the woman & exact revenge. In her case, she thinks she can change him & fix him like a damaged car. People are not renovation projects & he is always going to remain as he is: a violent, drunken lout. She seems to be addicted to him almost like a drug addict hates the drug but returns to his habit none the less. He drinks more heavily on weekends & I know that, one day, I'll get a message from her aunt saying that, this time, he killed her & the kids. It is maddening knowing that something horrific is impending but being powerless to prevent it.
2. Fast forward: she is in her early 20s, unmarried but with 2 kids (age 2 & a 6 month old baby) from her boyfriend who is also Inuit. She began posting distressing messages about the rows they'd get into. These would become unwieldy & altogether out of hand. He drinks heavily & becomes very violent. Last Friday evening, she uploaded a photo of the aftermath of one of his drunken rages. She had a black eye & a gash across her eyebrow where he'd smashed a beer bottle & slashed her in the face with the broken edge of it. The kids were there at the time. She had to get stitches BUT she LIED to the Dr. about what had happened.
A family member saw the photo too & alerted local police. When they got to her (it is a very small isolated reservation) she lied to the police too (!) Over the weekend, he continued drinking & raging. Other family members of hers began posting that she needed to get to hell out of there & away from him with her kids. She was posting messages about how terrible things were at home with him & how he was abusing her emotionally & physically.
Two nights ago, he blackened both her eyes in a drunken rage. He also hit the 2 year old & she cried herself to sleep. He threatened to murder her. She is not originally from this particular reservation, but from another that is also up north beyond the tree line in the tundra. Her boyfriend has an 'issue' with the fact that she is not a local girl & he uses that as a pretext for mistrusting & maltreating her (makes no sense whatsoever). This time, I got in contact with Montreal"s Native Women's Shelter & got advice from them: I was at a loss as to how to help & what resources there were for her. They gave me the # for her local police advised me to call them. I did that & the police rushed over. They followed up with me.
Apparently, she lied to them again!!! Even with the damning photos from Facebook & all her posts, it does not constitute 'evidence' because she could claim someone else had hacked her account & made fraudulent use of it. The cop knew damned well that she was behind the posts BUT since, when they got to her home, she was unwilling to admit anything & she lied to them again about her injuries, there was nothing they could do. The cop said that they had a long history about that boyfriend & his drunken rages & violence. Her aunt has notified social services up north & hopefully they will be able to do something.
On the one hand, I am furious at that guy for being a violent, abusive drunken @$$#0le but I am also mad at her. She is choosing her obsession with that rotter over the safety & well-being of 2 babies. They can do nothing for themselves & she is not protecting them. She needs to have a guy (ANY guy) in her life in order to feel whole. Social services must take those kids away from her before he kills them as he has threatened to do.
I have done what little I can from so far away, but I am mad at her for her complicity in endangering her children's lives. As a teacher with extensive psych & social education, I know that women often lie to protect abusive men & they keep going back to them. Sometimes this is out of fear of what the guy will do, since the police can only hold an abuser for 2 days, then they must release him. Many of these men go straight back to the woman & exact revenge. In her case, she thinks she can change him & fix him like a damaged car. People are not renovation projects & he is always going to remain as he is: a violent, drunken lout. She seems to be addicted to him almost like a drug addict hates the drug but returns to his habit none the less. He drinks more heavily on weekends & I know that, one day, I'll get a message from her aunt saying that, this time, he killed her & the kids. It is maddening knowing that something horrific is impending but being powerless to prevent it.
