I like that duck analogy. Never used it myself. But it's cute. And I think it actually applies for some of us in here.
At some point in my life I started to think I was going, as Kyou Nukui said above, "batpoop crazy".
I got a clean bill of health from every doctor I saw. My hormone levels have always been fine. I've had no head injuries. I've been seeing therapists, taking meds (SSRI's, benzos, mood stabilizers, over-the-counter remedies), and trying every single thing under the sun to improve my life since 2001. Wasn't always consistent with therapy, but I have been for more than two years now, which is fantastic and I feel so lucky that I actually have good health insurance now. I tried to change my environment. I tried to change jobs. I tried meditation. Before stims, I tried to change my sleeping habits (quite unsuccessful).
That's almost 19 years of actively trying and failing.
How did I suspect (a) neurological development condition(s)? Talking to my therapist, digging so deep into all my lifelong issues that ate away at me. A bunch of light bulbs went off during the course of therapy.
I strongly suspected ADHD and/or ASD, but I ultimately rejected ASD. I internalized all the negative crap everyone heard about autism. I believed all of it. Autism had crept into my mind years ago actually, but I kept pushing it away. I was determined to get diagnosed for what I knew I had, which was ADHD. But don't anyone dare tell me I am autistic!
I re-read all my journals. I kept journals since I was 7! I started getting obsessed with writing when I was 6. Those journals were very telling.
My ASD traits were more severe when I was younger. Panic attacks from being near very loud and large things. Speech issues (stutter and lisp for certain, don't know if I had any delays though), extreme dislike of being touched and looking at people. Visible echolalia. Outbursts that no one could understand. Extremely hyper. Loved to play by myself. Had difficulty playing with others because if I could not control the play, then it was very upsetting. Unusual attachment to lots of objects. I once had a MAJOR melt down when I lost my teddy bear at a store. I had to be physically restrained while strangers looked on in horror.
The scary neighbor a few suspected was a sex offender focused on me for a while. He was always trying to lure me over to his house with candy, and other "fun" stuff he claimed was inside his house. Why only me? The neighborhood was full of children. None of the other children, nor many of the adults had any problems with seemingly "harmless" yet somewhat strange Ernie (yes, that was his name. I still find it funny.). I suppose I was the most vulnerable of them all. My older sister, older cousins and parents noticed his gross, creepy attachment to me and were very protective and made sure I was never around him alone.
I'm a scientist by nature and therefore am very objective by nature. I am also a trained scientist. I am still training, because lifelong learning is a serious thing for me and I will never not be consumed by learning stuff.
Does being a scientist mean I can't ever make the mistake of being subjective in my self-assessment? Nope. And I admit I've made those kinds of mistakes before, but they are very few and far between.
I trust my excellent reasoning and evidence collecting and analytical skills enough to declare that I sure as hell am a duck.
But if for some reason, an official diagnosis by a trained professional who would not know even half of the things I know about myself and my history (what I just posted - tip of the ice burg) is required of me, then sure, I'll get one.
A lot of people here who are self-diagnosed, I trust they know themselves and they've dug deep for a long time, trying to find some answers too. Now, a lot of them may not be scientists who, by nature and/or training, automatically see things objectively. but I don't think that necessarily discounts their self-assessments. Besides, I don't see anyone here who claims to be autistic after doing just one or two online assessments, reading a couple of articles, and 30 minutes of introspection. That just doesn't happen, especially with those who strongly suspect they have ADHD/ASD etc.
At some point in my life I started to think I was going, as Kyou Nukui said above, "batpoop crazy".
I got a clean bill of health from every doctor I saw. My hormone levels have always been fine. I've had no head injuries. I've been seeing therapists, taking meds (SSRI's, benzos, mood stabilizers, over-the-counter remedies), and trying every single thing under the sun to improve my life since 2001. Wasn't always consistent with therapy, but I have been for more than two years now, which is fantastic and I feel so lucky that I actually have good health insurance now. I tried to change my environment. I tried to change jobs. I tried meditation. Before stims, I tried to change my sleeping habits (quite unsuccessful).
That's almost 19 years of actively trying and failing.
How did I suspect (a) neurological development condition(s)? Talking to my therapist, digging so deep into all my lifelong issues that ate away at me. A bunch of light bulbs went off during the course of therapy.
I strongly suspected ADHD and/or ASD, but I ultimately rejected ASD. I internalized all the negative crap everyone heard about autism. I believed all of it. Autism had crept into my mind years ago actually, but I kept pushing it away. I was determined to get diagnosed for what I knew I had, which was ADHD. But don't anyone dare tell me I am autistic!
I re-read all my journals. I kept journals since I was 7! I started getting obsessed with writing when I was 6. Those journals were very telling.
My ASD traits were more severe when I was younger. Panic attacks from being near very loud and large things. Speech issues (stutter and lisp for certain, don't know if I had any delays though), extreme dislike of being touched and looking at people. Visible echolalia. Outbursts that no one could understand. Extremely hyper. Loved to play by myself. Had difficulty playing with others because if I could not control the play, then it was very upsetting. Unusual attachment to lots of objects. I once had a MAJOR melt down when I lost my teddy bear at a store. I had to be physically restrained while strangers looked on in horror.
The scary neighbor a few suspected was a sex offender focused on me for a while. He was always trying to lure me over to his house with candy, and other "fun" stuff he claimed was inside his house. Why only me? The neighborhood was full of children. None of the other children, nor many of the adults had any problems with seemingly "harmless" yet somewhat strange Ernie (yes, that was his name. I still find it funny.). I suppose I was the most vulnerable of them all. My older sister, older cousins and parents noticed his gross, creepy attachment to me and were very protective and made sure I was never around him alone.
I'm a scientist by nature and therefore am very objective by nature. I am also a trained scientist. I am still training, because lifelong learning is a serious thing for me and I will never not be consumed by learning stuff.
Does being a scientist mean I can't ever make the mistake of being subjective in my self-assessment? Nope. And I admit I've made those kinds of mistakes before, but they are very few and far between.
I trust my excellent reasoning and evidence collecting and analytical skills enough to declare that I sure as hell am a duck.
But if for some reason, an official diagnosis by a trained professional who would not know even half of the things I know about myself and my history (what I just posted - tip of the ice burg) is required of me, then sure, I'll get one.
A lot of people here who are self-diagnosed, I trust they know themselves and they've dug deep for a long time, trying to find some answers too. Now, a lot of them may not be scientists who, by nature and/or training, automatically see things objectively. but I don't think that necessarily discounts their self-assessments. Besides, I don't see anyone here who claims to be autistic after doing just one or two online assessments, reading a couple of articles, and 30 minutes of introspection. That just doesn't happen, especially with those who strongly suspect they have ADHD/ASD etc.