What is the thing you most want NTs to understand about people on the spectrum?

[clg114]

I'd like most people to just use their brains and think before they speak or act. A little common courtesy would be nice too. If I'm not grabbing your underwear and asking about your bedroom habits or going into your office and rearranging or breaking your items, I probably would appreciate the same respect.

I'll keep dreamin'.

AsheSkler said " I'd like most people to just use their brains and think before they speak or act". That's it! If everybody did this, just think how many less problems there would be. Unfortunately, "most people" do not operate this way. It makes me wonder how they keep from hurting themselves.

 

[pax]

I , (like others here,) wish they would treat us with the same respect they treat others.
I wish they would stop projecting all there worst behaviours and motives onto us, because they can't be bothered learning about us our condition, or what is really going on in our world, so they automatically assume the worst.

 

[Häxan]

I would like them to understand that our feelings, thoughts, and emotions are just as valid as theirs!

I despise it when I am told it is "just my autism" and that I am over reacting, as if my feelings are not actually not real feelings just a part of my "condition".

 

[AsheSkyler]

AsheSkler said " I'd like most people to just use their brains and think before they speak or act". That's it! If everybody did this, just think how many less problems there would be. Unfortunately, "most people" do not operate this way. It makes me wonder how they keep from hurting themselves.

They don't, hospitals would either go out of business or be much smaller.

 

[KinksFan]

Loud voices and yelling startles me, and it hurts my ears. It's like like someone jumping in the dark in front of me and shouting, "Boo!" It's even worse when people use that method when they feel entitled to "correct" me. Please don't do it. It causes me to have flashbacks of my upbringing.

 

[CristalViper]

That the things we do, maybe flailing our arms when we're excited, or covering our ears when it's too loud, are normal. It's how we deal with certain situations.

 

[Ylva]

I'd like them to realize (on an emotional level, cuz that's where they act from) that we are people, too, and treating adults like they're five is entirely invasive and inappropriate.

 

[Nisk]

I'd like them to understand that my feelings and thoughts are no less valid because I don't communicate them in a way that is acceptable to society

 

[Aspieistj]

I would like them to utilize the information that is available to explain exactly what autism is and not just dismiss the information as something we, on the spectrum, could control if we really tried. I absolutely WANT to be viewed as having a disability and hope then that NTs would have the compassion to make an effort to tolerate us and let us demonstrate our other abilities.

 

[enmidford]

I think these are great ideas and they are very valid. The problem with a lot of western society is they engage their mouth without even knowing what they are saying, don't they say the emptiest barrels make the loudest noise. I try to tell myself as well as my Aspie daughter before you respond to the comments, think first about your relationship you are going to have with the way you deal with your reaction to a comment or situation, as I try to tell her like Shakespeare said in his plays , "All that is so is not so". And secondly always question to ascertain if this is reasonable and fair, Occam's razor was very accurate and I feel helpful advise for all us Aspies.

 

[CaveDweller]

That if Autism had never existed we'd probably still be waiting for the wheel to be invented.

 

[bkind]

Wow, really?!?!?! THAT is NOT normal behavior for anyone AsheSkyler! That person is a super PIA!!!! You have my sympathies!

Seriously. I don't know who the hell you're talking about, but if you think that this psycho you ran into is somehow a demonstration of aspies then get the f out of here, Goebls!

 

[CaveDweller]

I , (like others here,) wish they would treat us with the same respect they treat others.
I wish they would stop projecting all there worst behaviours and motives onto us, because they can't be bothered learning about us our condition, or what is really going on in our world, so they automatically assume the worst.

So true and well said! I find that people assume that all others think the same way as they do and therefore view other people's behaviour in terms of what they themselves would have meant if it was them saying or doing it. You simply cannot do this with people on the spectrum. You get fed up of being continuously misinterpreted.

 

[Suzanne]

Really? You cheated on him and you don't think that maybe his lashing out at you about your condition is just a way to hurt you back? Look, Jesus forgave the lady who was going to be stoned, but damn, don't try throwing a pitty party like you're the victim here. The bull about people cheating because theyre dissatisfied is a cop out. Leave before it comes to that. If you made the mistake, I feel for you, but quit the whining okay? Get some character, own up, cast off your codependencies, do not paralyze yourself with shame, and then move on. Walk straight.

With out any disrespect but you have no idea of who I am and what my life is, so not sure what actually gives you the right to say these things????!!!!

 

[bkind]

With out any disrespect but you have no idea of who I am and what my life is, so not sure what actually gives you the right to say these things????!!!!

Okay. I said what I wanted. I'm just going by what info you revealed. I don't need to throw stones.

 

[Suzanne]

Okay. I said what I wanted. I'm just going by what info you revealed. I don't need to throw stones.

What I find astonishing, is that you are new here and yet, passing judgement. One can reveal things because they feel safe. I think you should take a look at yourself and think: is this the way I should behave? Does it serve a purpose? Does it make people respect me because I am swearing and being foul to other users? If the answer is yes, then you are on the wrong forum and if it is no, then you really ought to retract your very anti social "behaviour"!

 

[gringosteve]

That my inability to hear/listen is nothing to do with my hearing. And whilst I can understand it must be frustrating for other people, simply ensuring you have my attention before talking further will make a massive difference.

Also expecting me to process information in a busy environment or when my head is tired from running at full pace all day is stressful. Choose your moments for certain conversations

 

[metalminx24]

bkind (is this ironic?), some of those comments have been a special kind of nasty. It's a little late to talk about throwing stones, it seems like the equipment of choice is boulders and a catapult. As Suzanne said, people here share things they don't share with anyone else. No one professes to be perfect, but harsh judgement is unhelpful and most of us try to be supportive.

 

[gringosteve]

That my inability to hear/listen is nothing to do with my hearing. And whilst I can understand it must be frustrating for other people, simply ensuring you have my attention before talking further will make a massive difference.

Also expecting me to process information in a busy environment or when my head is tired from running at full pace all day is stressful. Choose your moments for certain conversations

 

[Ste11aeres]

I've deleted most of bkind's comments. No need to reply any more to them, nor to refer to them.