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What helps YOU?

Southern Discomfort

Southern Discomfort

Smarter than the Average Bear
V.I.P Member
Each day on this website we get a steady flow of people who get increasingly desperate about their personal situation, who have negative perceptions of themselves, who have often gone to mental health trusts only to face long waiting times, therapies that cannot be helpful and offered medication which offers no guarantees.

So what can we do? Well I thought maybe a good idea would be to open a sort of directory of sorts which can be updated (I'll try my best to categorise it as long as I can with editing posts) about what works for other people.

So share away! What has worked for you and what have you also heard that works for others?

Edit: If you'd like your reply to be added here please go into detail on what helps you.

Volunteering
https://www.autismforums.com/threads/what-helps-you.26142/#post-525210

Peer Groups
https://www.autismforums.com/threads/what-helps-you.26142/#post-525210

Medication
https://www.autismforums.com/threads/what-helps-you.26142/#post-525211

Swimming
https://www.autismforums.com/threads/what-helps-you.26142/#post-525379
https://www.autismforums.com/threads/what-helps-you.26142/#post-525429

Roleplaying
https://www.autismforums.com/threads/what-helps-you.26142/#post-525496

Learning to Drive
https://www.autismforums.com/threads/what-helps-you.26142/#post-525210

Physical Exercise (General)
https://www.autismforums.com/threads/what-helps-you.26142/#post-525373
https://www.autismforums.com/threads/what-helps-you.26142/#post-525360

Supplements
https://www.autismforums.com/threads/what-helps-you.26142/#post-525360

Acting and Drama Groups
https://www.autismforums.com/threads/what-helps-you.26142/#post-525210

Mobile Phone Apps
https://www.autismforums.com/threads/what-helps-you.26142/#post-525360

Sensory aids
https://www.autismforums.com/threads/what-helps-you.26142/#post-525226
 
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For me what has worked as been reaching out to others, participating in peer groups and volunteering to get back onto the pathway of employment. This was all set up after I suffered a mental breakdown.

Volunteer

I found a wonderful job working at a lavender farm within driving distance for me which works as a care farm for people with all ranges of disabilities and mental health problems and needs. We look after each other and everyone 'mucks' in. We are open to discussing our problems and what we find helpful. It gives people a sense of purpose and responsibility. It's helped me build confidence in myself and pushes me to do more. I love my work which is something I was never sure I'd be able to say. I'd strongly recommend looking for volunteer work. It doesn't have to be dealing with customers in a shop, it could be anything. It also looks great on a CV as it shows you have had responsibilities, work experience, and give up your own time to help other people.

Peer groups

I've also found peer groups to be helpful. I used to be part of a drop in group for people with specific mental health problems but that has since dissolved as what it was. Instead we have outdoor activities that extract more people. We go out rock climbing, kayaking, cooking and go on photography sessions which last October we held an exhibition with an excellent turn out and was featured in a local newspaper. This, like the volunteering, has allowed me to be more open about my problems, realise there's no shame in having a mental illness and also just make friends - something I was severely lacking when I was being increasingly isolated.

Learning to drive

This is sort of a right of passage for people in my area. It's difficult to get anyway without a car for me, there's no buses and no trains I can take. I live out in the countryside.
This has built up confidence for me, something I was severely lacking. Don't get me wrong, this can seem like a massive battle to learn to drive and not a very fun one either, it requires a lot of work and money to do with a professional instructor like what I did. However the pay off is enormous and has given me my own independence.

Acting classes

This is now into the realms of what I haven't done but I know it can work very well for those who don't have the money for therapy, who have social problems. This can work for any age, open up a possibility for work and to make friends.
This teaches one how to approach others, how to have a conversation, teaches people to be empathetic as you take on a role other than yourself. It gives people a sense of body perception and awareness in space, where one's part ends and another person's begin. That sense of how to keep a rolling conversation going and think 'on your feet'.
 
Medication

This can be a controversial topic but I still hold it as one that can be potentially beneficial IF you find one that works for you. I've found the mix of medication I take to be very helpful, it works on my depression and my obsessive nature with my interests that tend to consume all my free time. I'm lucky though that I don't have side effects with the medicines I take and the doses I take. It can be trial and error for a good part of the journey and can require patience and willingness to be brave and to try different drugs but I can tell you now that the pay off for this can work really well.
 
Antidepressants did work for me, but came off them, I see them as a temporary measure and don't want to become dependent on them long-term.

Keeping busy and active. Having a project, something to work on.

Taking plenty of exercise, walking, cycling, getting fresh air. Helps my mood.

Giving myself something to look forward to; a trip out or a treat.

Having a routine and winding down in the evening helps me sleep. So does blacking the windows out and earplugs.

Varied diet, plenty of protein, fruit and vegetables helps my mood and not to have brain fog.

As @Mr Allen has also stated in another thread, always have a plan B. That means that I don't get so anxious about things going wrong.
 
Going to the park when there’s no pollen outbreaks to see the dogs and enjoy some coffee alone. My “me time.”

What also helps me is my ND friend (ND like myself I’m proud to say) because he accepts me just the way I am. I can tell when he says this he gets choked up a bit and sometimes I do to, but as we’re both Earth signs (he’s Taurus and I’m Capricorn) that emotions are there, but very, very deep. I’m very lucky he’s a Taurus. They’re very loyal and dependable!
 
Physical activity, like exercising, sports, or relaxing (for you) work type activities. Mine is landscaping.
 
Brainwaves app, binaural sounds that I can feel relaxing my brain.

Supplements like niacin and pregnenolone.

Exercise still exhausts me, but getting out into nature is wonderful.

Trying out new app, Molehill Mountain, which is supposed to train your brain to handle anxiety better. Will keep ya'll posted.
 
Daring to believe that I can find a way to handle it.
(Whatever ‘it’ may be)

I may not handle ‘it’ well or textbook but I have to start somewhere and have the freedom to tweak, adjust, learn and understand more and try new ideas or methods.

Finding ways that work for me.

Physical activity - hard/soft landscaping, dog walks using gradients or hills, an activity that’s a bit of a challenge and uses up a lot of energy.

Just swam in a public pool (20 lengths)
(12 months ago that was impossible due to fear/anxiety)

Challenging and questioning myself.
Making small changes and building on those.

Another thing that helps is reaching out and asking for help.
This is a new thing and takes some getting used to.
 
Gracey said:
Just swam in a public pool (20 lengths)
(12 months ago that was impossible due to fear/anxiety)
Click to expand...


Wow Gracey that's a fabulous achievement! Good on you! I used to swim before my legs went bad. Swam a mile 4-5 days week (36 pool lengths of a 75 foot pool) with mask, fins and snorkel. I miss it so much. Hoping my upcoming hip replacement will let me do it again.
 
LucyPurrs said:
Wow Gracey that's a fabulous achievement! Good on you! I used to swim before my legs went bad. Swam a mile 4-5 days week (36 pool lengths of a 75 foot pool) with mask, fins and snorkel. I miss it so much. Hoping my upcoming hip replacement will let me do it again.
Click to expand...

I would want that for you too :)
Here’s hoping all goes well.

I used swimming because I missed it and it was a challenge (noise, people, being out of the house and a form of exercise that’s tiring but less strain on these old bones)
Endorphin fix without stressing joints :)
 
Listening to music,drawing (when I’m not procrastinating),walking and being around animals though it’s been hard since I lost my Staffy Sprocket back in December,but when I do get another dog eventually I would like to get a rescue dog.
 
Swimming is low impact on joints so I bet it is a good way to exercise after your hip is replaced. Swimming is one of the ways I exercise.


LucyPurrs said:
Wow Gracey that's a fabulous achievement! Good on you! I used to swim before my legs went bad. Swam a mile 4-5 days week (36 pool lengths of a 75 foot pool) with mask, fins and snorkel. I miss it so much. Hoping my upcoming hip replacement will let me do it again.
Click to expand...
 
What helps me?

Lists to keep me on track (I try not to overload them and do a lot)
Swimming (anything water related mostly)
time alone
hiking, sailing, camping, just being with nature, laying down looking at the stars on a clear night
reading/researching
music... Lots of music

I have to include my meds, but I hate them (no secret)... I also take breaks from them to see how much I can handle on my own... LIFE unfiltered sort of sucks, and the sucky meds create the filters so LIFE isn't so chaotic (mostly). So, in some weird way I have to appreciate the sucky meds, but I want so badly to deal with things on my terms, and not depend on some chemical to help me navigate what others just see as nothing. It makes me feel weak, or less than others to have to have them. : (

What helps me most is to get done what I set out to do for the day, the feeling of achievement (even in the small stuff, and especially in the big stuff), somehow makes me feel right with myself... : )
 
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