What are your controversial opinions regarding the autism spectrum?

[Iamnotarabot]

Autistic traits are not confined to just people with autism, it's not so much the traits themselves that make us autistic, but a cluster of traits found together to make the autism profile. I sometimes have meltdowns - so do NTs. I have 'special interests' and can get very absorbed in them - so can NTs. I have sensory issues - NTs often have these as well. I have social difficulties - so do some NTs. What makes me different to NTs is that I have these together in a cluster, and that they significantly affect my life, whereas an NT with the same problem will usually cope much better with it, it won't affect their life so much.

I don't automatically attribute every quirk or issue I have to Asperger's - they may be due to an external issue or be a personality trait and have nothing to do with autism at all. I examine all possibilities, and don't assume that it is Asperger's.

Well thats a clever point of view , the only friend I told about it basically told me the same.
I want to add that its not only having everything in a cluster, autism for me, isnt diagnosed easely because most of the traits as you said are external symptoms, autism isnt defined by the traits you listed but it's whar inside of us that trigger all of that for different reasons than NT.

 

[Tesseract]

Controversial opinion 1: Contrary to popular belief, Autistic people in general are NOT retarded.

I didn't say they were. However, they generally do have problems of such severity that it actively hinders their ability to perform tasks the majority of us, including "aspies", take for granted. It isn't about intelligence, but ability to function. Keep a job, for example. Move out of home. Drive a car. That sort of thing.

 

[Tesseract]

...am not mentally challenged...

Poor word choice. I meant what I said above, in response to "Mr. Allen".

 

[LearnedCoward]

Yeah, I do feel that it's really easy for male aspies to fall into that "nice guy"/incel trap. There's nothing wrong with desiring companionship (it's part of being human), but I seem to notice a trend in aspie dating forums that it's dominated by men who complain about one or more of the following:

• Being unable to attract women because they feel they are a) too ugly, b) have autism, c) some other trait they feel is repelling women
• Their female friend isn't into them
• That women only seem to be into "jerks" (hence the nice guy syndrome)

I think many aspie guys haven't ever been mentored in the dating world and its complexities so they start to form a sense of entitlement and bitterness towards women. That's not an excuse for them, but it explains why aspie guys tend to develop misogynistic attitudes and nice guy syndrome.

Here's a controversial opinion (not necessarily relating to the autism spectrum): nobody is naturally "attractive" to anyone else. There's a lot of very conscious messaging and signal generating involved, and a crap ton of rules to understand. However, those of us on the spectrum either don't see all the stuff underneath the surface, or we think it's unfair.* This MRA stuff provides an easy solution for a lot of guys. Maybe too easy, if you understand my meaning. "Overly simplistic" is probably a better term.

* You know what? It is unfair. But tough. Life is unfair.

 

[Crossbreed]

@LearnedCoward , I think favorable pheromones are more responsible for strong attractions (than appearance, alone). The problem is (when I was single), I still didn't know how to reel anybody in...!

 

[LearnedCoward]

I didn't say they were. However, they generally do have problems of such severity that it actively hinders their ability to perform tasks the majority of us, including "aspies", take for granted. It isn't about intelligence, but ability to function. Keep a job, for example. Move out of home. Drive a car. That sort of thing.

This is where I start to disagree with you. These indicators of functionality are variable and subject to interpretation. I can keep a job not quite as well as I should, but pretty damn well for someone on the spectrum. I moved out when I was 17, but not exactly by choice :/ I can't drive a car, but that's more because of comorbid epilepsy. I have met many aspies who couldn't drive, leave home, and/or keep a job, and auties who could do any or all of these things. Really, IME, diagnostic labels aren't that much of a predictor.

Controversial opinion number two: Asperger's Syndrome is NOT a form of autism! I've known people with what is described as being autism, even the so-called mild versions of it, and I can safely say that I do NOT have what they have. I did not have any speech delays when I was young, am not mentally challenged, do not have catastrophic meltdowns, and do not 'stim'.

I am tempted to agree with you there. I (HFA) had a speech delay, have meltdowns, stim constantly, but am not mentally challenged. If you can't relate, then you are probably not autistic, even if you have an autism-like condition. I want to say that the two conditions are the same, if only for the sake of inclusiveness, but I'm beginning to think that they are just similar.

 

[Mr Allen]

Me too, I didn't say a word till I was about 3 (circa 1979 and back in the early '80s I had to have speech therapy as I spoke with a lisp, couldn't pronounce my S's.

Anyway back on topic... Over here in the UK, outside of the voluntary sector, nobody will employ Autistic adults, because any mention of Neurological problems in a potential employee sends up "Red Flags" to an employer, and they then bin your application.

 

[GrownupGirl]

My opinion that is controversial, among mostly NTs at least, is that we should be called "autistic" and not "person with autism". I really hate it. When someone has cancer, people say they have cancer because it is an actual disease, which autism is not. They don't say "person with cancerism".

 

[GrownupGirl]

That there are those who seem way too high functioning to be autistic. It gets to the point where autism seems insignificant.

I wonder if anyone here thinks I'm too high-functioning? Which brings up another controversial opinion of mine: I HATE the functioning labels. It's because of the label that for years before I was diagnosed people noticed thee were things about me that were "unusual" but they still had unrealistically high expectations for me and said I didn't need any special help. Also female aspies and autistic people often act differently and are less obvious than males. I don't know if it's part of our genes or society or both, but we come up with ways of "coping" with our problems. Like the way I was always role-playing with dolls and stuffed animals as a teenager and even an adult because trying to fit in with people my age was so difficult.

 

[LearnedCoward]

My opinion that is controversial, among mostly NTs at least, is that we should be called "autistic" and not "person with autism".

That's not controversial around here, but it certainly is among NTs.

I HATE the functioning labels.

As do I. Even when they fit, they don't really fit. My ability to function is both variable and situational, so saying I'm "high functioning" isn't quite accurate.

 

[Tom]

We are the reborn souls of Sea Monkeys torn from our Bowlfull of Happiness and flushed live
down the toilet.

The cold blooded humans who perpetrated the evil deed are reborn as Bivalves.

 

[Crossbreed]

@Tom , thanks for that. I remember seeing those ads in comic books and wondering about them. It prompted me to Google them and find out the "rest of the story."

 

[Mr Allen]

My opinion that is controversial, among mostly NTs at least, is that we should be called "autistic" and not "person with autism". I really hate it. When someone has cancer, people say they have cancer because it is an actual disease, which autism is not. They don't say "person with cancerism".

Back when I was first dagnosed I was posting on a US based wrestling forum, after looking online for info on Asperger's, someone saw all my posts after doing a WHOIS look up on my website, and posted to the world that I'm Aspie, without my consent!

They then proceeded to post about me having "Asperger's Disease" and I was like, WTF?! Just how stupid are these people?!

 

[Mary Lyn]

Anyway back on topic... Over here in the UK, outside of the voluntary sector, nobody will employ Autistic adults, because any mention of Neurological problems in a potential employee sends up "Red Flags" to an employer, and they then bin your application.

Yawn, how many times. Can you provide evidence please for this statement? And explain why you keep on telling prospective employers when you do not have to legally?

 

[Mr Allen]

Yawn, how many times. Can you provide evidence please for this statement? And explain why you keep on telling prospective employers when you do not have to legally?

Evidence? Meh, I declare my disabilities every time because I'm too honest not to, consequently I never get the job.

And even if I don't, I still don't get the job because if I go in to take my CV/cover letter, they see I wear a hearing aid which counts as as disability, and they say no anyway.

Equal opportunities my foot! They say that because they have to, they don't mean it.

 

[Mary Lyn]

Evidence? Meh, I declare my disabilities every time because I'm too honest not to, consequently I never get the job.

And even if I don't, I still don't get the job because if I go in to take my CV/cover letter, they see I wear a hearing aid which counts as as disability, and they say no anyway.

Equal opportunities my foot! They say that because they have to, they don't mean it.

You said "nobody will employ Autistic adults, because any mention of Neurological problems in a potential employee sends up "Red Flags" to an employer, and they then bin your application." What you mean is YOUR application is binned. How do you know this happens to EVERYBODY? You don't.

I suspect the real reason is that you keep applying for jobs for which you are not suitable. And the reason you declare autism to your possible employee, is that you can throw the equal opportunites act at them, when you fail the job, rather than admit that you were not suitable for it and in fact could not do it to a satisfactory level.

It is not about honesty it is about suitability for a job. B&Q have a good track record on employing people that others turn down. And I am sure there are plenty of jobs you could do if you would look at suitability rather than what you deem as good enough for you. And anyway you could use a hearing aid that is not visable. Your disability benefits should cover the cost.

 

[Ezra]

My opinion that is controversial, among mostly NTs at least, is that we should be called "autistic" and not "person with autism". I really hate it. When someone has cancer, people say they have cancer because it is an actual disease, which autism is not. They don't say "person with cancerism".

Actually while I agree that it's probably more of general public PC thing, I have read autistics on another forum objecting to being called autistic and say they prefer person with autism. But it's certainly not something I relate to. Call me either one, just don't call me late to dinner.

 

[LearnedCoward]

And anyway you could use a hearing aid that is not visable. Your disability benefits should cover the cost.

Ahaha no.

Hearing aids are not covered by insurance or benefits, at least where I am, and one of those tiny hearing aids that fits completely in the ear canal costs about as much as a car.

Besides, this is highly counterproductive. Someone should be able to wear whatever size hearing aid without being discriminated against.

 

[Khendra]

Many of us were simply viewed as shy, geeky, nerdy, and eccentric people a decade or two ago, when it was more common and acceptable to live life at a slower and more solitary pace. Now everything has to be rapid and integrated, and some of us just cannot take modern society's need for endless change and stimulation.

 

[Mary Lyn]

Ahaha no.

Hearing aids are not covered by insurance or benefits, at least where I am, and one of those tiny hearing aids that fits completely in the ear canal costs about as much as a car.

Besides, this is highly counterproductive. Someone should be able to wear whatever size hearing aid without being discriminated against.

I did not mean they are covered - they have to be bought but someone on disability benefits should be able to afford them. I'll bet they do not baulk at the idea of pulling out a fortune for the latest tv. I say this as someone who was recently on disability benefits in the UK.

Afraid you are being unrealistic. A member of the general public, faced with a salesperson wearing a hearing aid, will not know whether they should speak up or shout and they will certainly not want their requests to be broadcast around the shop floor.

It is all about profit and sales, and the retail shop floor is not a place where anyone with communication problems, obvious disabilities and social dysfunction belongs.

In fact they should be fined for wasting the time of others when they could be looking for work in more suitable areas.