University life is overwhelming

[Dadamen]

Never Went to university, college instead. The trick is to get past the first year. that's how they make their money from, only five of us made it to third year in college 70 started.

I'm lucky the university is free in Croatia, at least if you study for the first time, but if you drop out and then begin studying something else, you need to pay for it yourself. However, post-graduate education is not free.

But, the first year is the hardest at any university. They told us first day that who gets past first year finishes it all.

 

[Ronald Zeeman]

I'm lucky the university is free in Croatia, at least if you study for the first time, but if you drop out and then begin studying something else, you need to pay for it yourself. However, post-graduate education is not free.

But, the first year is the hardest at any university. They told us first day that who gets past first year finishes it all.

My sister told me about the same thing after the first year they have too much invested in you.

 

[VictorR]

So, W means Withderw.
Yes, college is simply not for everyone. Many people try and then drop out and get a job only with high school.
The only problem is if you have a high scool called gymnasium in my country. After that school it is expected to go to university because you have no qualification after it, it is a general high school. The other type of high school is the one that you get qualification with, but you can still get further education on university after it. For example after a medical high school you are a nurse, and then you can work as a nurse or study to become a diplomated nurse or study medicine and become a doctor.
I went to gymnasium, so I'm noone in finding a job without university.

If I understand correctly, it sounds like Croatia has a German-style high school system where one is either on a university-prep track, or on a vocational track.

In the United States and Canada, high schools are almost always a singular combined track, but after 10th grade, depending on whether one is intending to continue to college/university, they may choose more academic courses (e.g. pre-calculus, calculus, English literature) or more applied courses (e.g. applied math, communications).

The major exception is Quebec, where secondary school only goes to grade 11 (rather than grade 12) and students proceed to CEGEP, which can either be a two year university prep program that consists of what would otherwise be grade 12 and 1st year college/university, or a vocational program of the student's choice, which might last up to three years.

Similar to your situation, it's free the first time, but any retakes or second programs would be at the student's own expense.

One other major difference I'd like to point out is that in the US and Canada, a bachelor's degree is usually 4 years (with a honours degree being 5). There are some jurisdictions that have 3 year bachelor degrees in the arts for those who are not intending to continue to graduate studies.

 

[Dadamen]

My sister told me about the same thing after the first year they have too much invested in you.

Here it's up to the subject. I'm in medical biochemistry, but year 1 has subjects like physics and physical and analytical chemistry and so many people fail that 1st year, I hope I'll pass it.

If I understand correctly, it sounds like Croatia has a German-style high school system where one is either on a university-prep track, or on a vocational track.

In the United States and Canada, high schools are almost always a singular combined track, but after 10th grade, depending on whether one is intending to continue to college/university, they may choose more academic courses (e.g. pre-calculus, calculus, English literature) or more applied courses (e.g. applied math, communications).

The major exception is Quebec, where secondary school only goes to grade 11 (rather than grade 12) and students proceed to CEGEP, which can either be a two year university prep program that consists of what would otherwise be grade 12 and 1st year college/university, or a vocational program of the student's choice, which might last up to three years.

Similar to your situation, it's free the first time, but any retakes or second programs would be at the student's own expense.

One other major difference I'd like to point out is that in the US and Canada, a bachelor's degree is usually 4 years (with a honours degree being 5). There are some jurisdictions that have 3 year bachelor degrees in the arts for those who are not intending to continue to graduate studies.

Well, not exactly like Germany. The difference between Croatia and Germany is that Germany has 4 years of elementary school and then what is a middle and high school in the US in Germany is either Hauptschule, Realschule or Gymnasium, Hauptschule lasts 6 years I think, Realschule 7 years and these 2 are vocational schools. The gymnasium lasts 8 years and is preparing for university. Croatia had such a system before world war ii.
Now it is like this. What is grade school and middle school in the US in Croatia is all one elementary school that takes 8 years. The difference is that in years 1-4, you have 1 teacher that teaches everything and in years 5-8 you have a special teacher for every subject. Then goes high school where kids choose what occupation will they do or go to the gymnasium.

I think the American high school system is better. This last high school year is really awful here because you have all subjects and can't focus on preparing for university. I needed biology and chemistry but needed to work a lot on subjects such as history, geography and philosophy. I think there should be a system that everyone learns everything in elementary and the first 2 years of the gymnasium and then chooses what to learn in year 3 and especially 4.

 

[Ronald Zeeman]

our system here worked in the past 5 years of high school. The government got rid of this about 10 years as a cost saving method. the brighter students the started going back for what they call a victory lap. now there is rumor s they reinstate it the kids are too young to enter university drinking. Flunking out one of my friends is a professor of chemistry. over the last 10 years he had to dumb down his course's. I was taught a complete calculus course 46 years ago while they phased it out my son was taught only differential calculus. in university you had to pick uo integral calculus on your own or flunk no one cared after all it's only first year most flunk anyway.

 

[Tony Ramirez]

My cousins on my Aunt Mary's side did not complete college. They just worked after dropping out and advanced themself at their jobs at sales.

 

[Ronald Zeeman]

Marie my wife worked at a bank for over 30 years it took her two-college diploma, obtained post-employment.to maintain her position. before a high school diploma was enough now it's going back as finding employees is getting more difficult as baby Boomers retire.

 

[autism-and-autotune]

Did you/do you struggle with university life as an autistic person?
I know that everyone on the spectrum is different, and there's no one-size-fits-all answer. But what did you struggle with? I am currently so overwhelmed, but I'm not sure why! I keep having burnouts even though I tried to be less diligent. I just want to pass exams, nothing more. I don't know why it looks like that. I have some ideas, though:

1. it's not what I'm passionate about, and I get ridiculously drained from doing something and caring about something I just don't like that much.
2. I get overwhelmed so easily! But why?
3. It's also about structure. In a weird way, though. Back when I was in school, I just hated it. I skipped classes a lot! A LOT! And I rarely did something I was supposed to during the classes I attended. But it still gave me structure. "Biology class? Time to write a poem. Chemistry class? Let's study philosophy. Math class? I want to do the math, but I don't like this teacher; let's go to the nearby cafe and practice math there." You get it. If I had a free period, I tried to practice the piano in the library (with my headphones on, of course). And I had a lot to do after school. Music classes or courses that helped me prepare for the big exams. So there was a lot of it. I'm not saying this was healthy. I barely ate, I was underslept and had bouts of depression (connected with my family situation, but maybe the way I lived could be taken into account as well). But it was a strategy. I did a lot of things.
4. Social aspects. I kind of accepted that I'm not a part of a group there and that I'm a lone wolf, but maybe it still hangs over my head. In a way, I am lucky cause I met two people that I talk to (a miracle!!), but I wouldn't call them friends.

So these are the things I suspect could have something to do with it. But still. Is it enough to make it so overwhelming? Studying is not the only thing I do. I'm also a volunteer, and I try to pursue my real passions. And yes, I could abandon one of these things, or both. But I would feel even worse. I wouldn't be doing anything I love, and I would be even more lonely cause I would lose the people I do the volunteer work with!

I thought that it has to do something with ASD. But if it doesn't, then what the hell is happening with me?

I'm sorry to hear of your struggle while in university! I hope my insight may be helpful.

Granted, I was only diagnosed with Autism about four years after I completed college, but I did have a documented disability prior (NVLD). I grew up in a household which stressed that grades were paramount and grades equal money (the parental mantra of 'we want you to have a better life than us!). Long story short, I'm in a bunch of debt and cannot even afford my diploma (can of worms for another day).

In college, I knew what I wanted to do from the get-go but faced initial discouragement from my instructor. We butted heads til they saw it was pointless to obstruct me further. College took me five years to complete due to depression, burnout, and other mental stress--plus the fact that my state-school had different requirements from, say, the college of my sister (to which I was held to a standard by our parents).

I was burnt out by course-work and the fact that I never knew when it was all going to end. It felt like I was putting in so much work for absolutely zero reward. At my university, 'one size fits all' was definitely something that was obvious. Due to my autism I was a poor performer and my nerves got the better of my constantly, which lead to more self-loathing. I was jealous of other performers.

Would being diagnosed in college have made things easier for me? I'm not sure, from a resource perspective...but to understand why I became angry and burnt out from being not surrounded by my true passion would've been a relief to know.

The structure and routine of college was definitely something which saved me, but eventually I learned that I had spread myself thin with too many obligations. It was a lot to deal with and I think all the stress (self-brought and otherwise) took a few years off my life. My parents now don't even seem to really care that I completed school---even though it's projection from their side because neither of them went to four-year college.

 

[Ronald Zeeman]

If I had known I had autism 40 years ago, I would have gone to university rather than college and would have become a particle physicist, no regrets. just get through the first year you are not the first to struggle. Amazing how many really bright people drop out, then later land on their feet.

 

[Brendan]

I'm sorry to hear of your struggle while in university! I hope my insight may be helpful.

Granted, I was only diagnosed with Autism about four years after I completed college, but I did have a documented disability prior (NVLD). I grew up in a household which stressed that grades were paramount and grades equal money (the parental mantra of 'we want you to have a better life than us!). Long story short, I'm in a bunch of debt and cannot even afford my diploma (can of worms for another day).

In college, I knew what I wanted to do from the get-go but faced initial discouragement from my instructor. We butted heads til they saw it was pointless to obstruct me further. College took me five years to complete due to depression, burnout, and other mental stress--plus the fact that my state-school had different requirements from, say, the college of my sister (to which I was held to a standard by our parents).

I was burnt out by course-work and the fact that I never knew when it was all going to end. It felt like I was putting in so much work for absolutely zero reward. At my university, 'one size fits all' was definitely something that was obvious. Due to my autism I was a poor performer and my nerves got the better of my constantly, which lead to more self-loathing. I was jealous of other performers.

Would being diagnosed in college have made things easier for me? I'm not sure, from a resource perspective...but to understand why I became angry and burnt out from being not surrounded by my true passion would've been a relief to know.

The structure and routine of college was definitely something which saved me, but eventually I learned that I had spread myself thin with too many obligations. It was a lot to deal with and I think all the stress (self-brought and otherwise) took a few years off my life. My parents now don't even seem to really care that I completed school---even though it's projection from their side because neither of them went to four-year college.

This video has really helped my kids with anxiety.

 

[Dadamen]

Well, I hoped I won't need any accomodations at my university, but maybe I'll need them.
The problem isn't even social interaction, the problem is my slow processing and poor concentration.
Everything went fine in first semester, but in second semester I got a subject called Physical chemistery which has a lot of lab work and is much harder that regular, general chemistery. In the lab, there are a lot of machines I've never seen before, but I need to use them by myself to make an expiriment. When the lab technician was explaining me how to use one of them I simply couldnt follow her beacause of my slow processing, she wondered how I entered university at all and was very rude to me. Then I told her I have asperger syndrome. After this she completely changed her behaviuor. She was suddenly kind to me and appologized because she was rude. She told me that the teachers and the dean should know about my disorder. Now I wonder should I get accomodations or not. I've passed both elementary and high school without any. This physical chemistery lab is over, but soon i'm starting analitic chemistery lab which is also hard.

 

[Dadamen]

Yes, I'll need to do that for analitic chemistery.

 

[CrazyInTrains]

Yes, university is so overwhelming I've had this tread stuck to my browser for months XD
I study to biomedical analyst, that's a person who works in a hospital laboratory here.

The second year has been the worst so far, the first was quite slow and a lot of time to practice while the second was very stressful with barely any time left over, mostly because it has been very many lectures and new stuff every day and no instructions on what to read and practice on in the books. Except the social part, I have so far not really ever made a friend (though I have at least talked a lot more with my classmates in the break room during the last month) has the worst and best been the lack of structure : P It's very good that I can decide for myself when to get up and when to study, but the lack of forced study periods and instructions like un upper secondary school makes it very difficult to study. It is of course partly due to bad teachers, some doesn't seem to care very much. But also how you are never free, I'm constantly stressed about exams and seminars, there's always more to do, I can never just relax and watch a film or something. I could always do something for my studies.

I don't know how to plan and practice on several topics at the same time, but at least I don't need much since I only have one course at the time, so I'll usually first write seminars and then watch lectures (we get almost everything recorded from 3 to 20 years ago) and when that's done try to practice on old tests, though there's usually not enough time for it to work as well as I would want.

Seminars and presentations have so far been a lot easier than in upper secondary school, they don't seem to have as high expectations as I was used to, which is very good for me.

 

[Dadamen]

Yes, university is so overwhelming I've had this tread stuck to my browser for months XD
I study to biomedical analyst, that's a person who works in a hospital laboratory here.

The second year has been the worst so far, the first was quite slow and a lot of time to practice while the second was very stressful with barely any time left over, mostly because it has been very many lectures and new stuff every day and no instructions on what to read and practice on in the books. Except the social part, I have so far not really ever made a friend (though I have at least talked a lot more with my classmates in the break room during the last month) has the worst and best been the lack of structure : P It's very good that I can decide for myself when to get up and when to study, but the lack of forced study periods and instructions like un upper secondary school makes it very difficult to study. It is of course partly due to bad teachers, some doesn't seem to care very much. But also how you are never free, I'm constantly stressed about exams and seminars, there's always more to do, I can never just relax and watch a film or something. I could always do something for my studies.

I don't know how to plan and practice on several topics at the same time, but at least I don't need much since I only have one course at the time, so I'll usually first write seminars and then watch lectures (we get almost everything recorded from 3 to 20 years ago) and when that's done try to practice on old tests, though there's usually not enough time for it to work as well as I would want.

Seminars and presentations have so far been a lot easier than in upper secondary school, they don't seem to have as high expectations as I was used to, which is very good for me.

Well, we study almost the same thing. Mine is called medical biochemistry. With this you can work both in medical laboratory and in science like chemists/molecular biologists.

Well, I think university is maybe somehow more aspie friendly than high school was. At the begining of the year you already know what to expect from the subject. So, I know I have to come to seminars and lab works, make lab reports and study for the exam. No homework and project tasks like in high school. In high school every day we could get some task, often team work that I found really stressful. Yes, it requires more self discipline, I struggled a bit with it during the year and now have to learn in summer to pass my exams in September so I can go on to next year.
In high school I had significant distress from Croatian (my mother language). We had to read a lot of books and she asked them in detail, while I struggled with understanding complex relationships and stories. Also she liked a lot of group works, instead of her teaching she would give us group project to learn. Great to get rid of Croatian at university.
Student life with a lot of socialising and parties is well, expected, but not mandatory. If I choose not to go I won't go. I'm not the only one who doesn't go to parties.

 

[CrazyInTrains]

Oh! Nice! We only study one course at the time, and don't really know what will be in them since the description is written very widely, when the course starts it's of course a lot better, but some teachers are very bad at organising the course page.

While not having homework like in lower education (though we rarely had homework in upper secondary school) it feels worse now, like you always have stuff to do, especially since my teachers are utterly bad at giving reading instructions so I've basically no idea what I'm supposed to be doing and it's hard to figure out what in the books that are supposed to connect to the lectures. Sometimes it seems like you should learn stuff that are barely ever mentioned anywhere. If I knew what I was doing, like in some summer courses I took from other universities, I would definitely prefer university over upper secondary school. I'm lucky we didn't have as much reading in Swedish or English as you seem to have had to have in Croatian, I'm sorry for you.

 

[Dadamen]

Books are what teachers recommend to study, but at least at my university there are often student-made scripts do study which are a lot shorter, but still enough to pass or even get an A. Yes, sometimes you really need to learn something barely mentioned, but those lectures arent even mandatory.
P.S. Did you read Crime and puniahment in upper secondary school? This one was pain for me. And also some from Croatian authors you probably havent heard of.

 

[CrazyInTrains]

Yeah, but they sometimes recommend (mandatory) books that barely talk about the topics ... And they have, at least in some courses, said that the book contains everything you need to know and that they write the questions from the books only. The last two courses are definitely not that. And I need to pass one of them to continue next semester. Baaah.

Nope, we didn't read Crime and Punishment (though it sounds a lot better with the Swedish title, Brott och straff imo : P ) I'm happy we didn't. We read some Swedish titles and in English more modern youth books like "The perks of being a wallflower", and some classics of course but not at that level.

 

[Ken]

Did you/do you struggle with university life as an autistic person?
I know that everyone on the spectrum is different, and there's no one-size-fits-all answer. But what did you struggle with? I am currently so overwhelmed, but I'm not sure why! I keep having burnouts even though I tried to be less diligent. I just want to pass exams, nothing more. I don't know why it looks like that. I have some ideas, though:

1. it's not what I'm passionate about, and I get ridiculously drained from doing something and caring about something I just don't like that much.
2. I get overwhelmed so easily! But why?
3. It's also about structure. In a weird way, though. Back when I was in school, I just hated it. I skipped classes a lot! A LOT! And I rarely did something I was supposed to during the classes I attended. But it still gave me structure. "Biology class? Time to write a poem. Chemistry class? Let's study philosophy. Math class? I want to do the math, but I don't like this teacher; let's go to the nearby cafe and practice math there." You get it. If I had a free period, I tried to practice the piano in the library (with my headphones on, of course). And I had a lot to do after school. Music classes or courses that helped me prepare for the big exams. So there was a lot of it. I'm not saying this was healthy. I barely ate, I was underslept and had bouts of depression (connected with my family situation, but maybe the way I lived could be taken into account as well). But it was a strategy. I did a lot of things.
4. Social aspects. I kind of accepted that I'm not a part of a group there and that I'm a lone wolf, but maybe it still hangs over my head. In a way, I am lucky cause I met two people that I talk to (a miracle!!), but I wouldn't call them friends.

So these are the things I suspect could have something to do with it. But still. Is it enough to make it so overwhelming? Studying is not the only thing I do. I'm also a volunteer, and I try to pursue my real passions. And yes, I could abandon one of these things, or both. But I would feel even worse. I wouldn't be doing anything I love, and I would be even more lonely cause I would lose the people I do the volunteer work with!

I thought that it has to do something with ASD. But if it doesn't, then what the hell is happening with me?

I barely got through one prep course. My autistic social anxiety was (is) totally crippling, so college was not an option. I was deeply depressed because I knew this completely dashed my dream career, which, as far as I knew, required a degree.

But, life and autism had another plan. I didn't, but my autism did. I never had a plan, but my autistic obsession worked me into my dream career all the way through retiring as a highly respected electronics design engineer. It wasn't easy, but I got there. And I feel that I was more successful than I would have been if I was "normal" and got a "normal" degree. At least, I ended up in a position above many of the engineers with esteemed degrees.

Why do you get so overwhelmed? Well, I also get overwhelmed easily. I have read that autistic's brain are 41% more active than NT's in equal settings, even at rest. I am always thinking about several things at once and none of them to do with the present. Can't help it, it's just there. What I am doing in the present is just added on top of all the background thinking - that is really not very background. Therefore my brain is already near capacity leaving less headroom for more attention. Anything social is overwhelming for me. Not sure about your situation, but that's me.

Newton's Third Law states that for every action (force) in nature there is an equal and opposite reaction. That means that the harder you have to work to achieve a goal, the greater will be the reward.

So, I would suggest that regardless how hard your struggles, just keep on keeping on, and you will find yourself successful, even if you get there unconventionally.

 

[Shevek]

I went from flunking out of high scool, to the library, to guest lecturing to graduating engineers. What I missed in University was time management and organization, learning to pass some subjects with no intention of remembering anything, putting up with stupid hoop-jumping, learning to work in teams, and meeting people to trade favours with to get money later in life. These days, I'd also have to become a debt slave.

 

[Ronald Zeeman]

I picked college over university, looking back now retired I made correct decision. Marks meant nothing to me head guidance, councilor, wrote some sort of recommendation on my behalf which got me accepted into a university, which I did not take advantage of took college instead. 70 students enrolled. Only 5 of us graduated, technologist
stream. I took two streams concurrently. Engineering and Microbiology found loophole; no additional cost involved.
So conventional route is not necessarily the only route. In high school I refused to take French and English past grade 10. yet in college where they taught a more practical English, I got A's.