trying to figure a few things out

[Jdeisher]

I have a few questions that I could not find on google. When I was really young, I would say after being potty trained, I had issues using the bathroom(number 2). It wasn't that I couldn't go, I literally refused to go, until it wasn't possible to hold in anymore.

I remember it very well, because I did it all the way up to age 22. Now I used to use my fist, and punch my lower abdomen, right where my intestines were. And of course it was an embarrassing thing to me and still is so I never ever brought it up to anyone. But I can't understand why I did it. And when I punched myself, it would be exactly 7 times, with the same amount of force.

I am still self diagnosed right now and still trying to get my childhood struggles together from my mother. She said I had a very high tolerance to pain. Where nothing hurt.

Was I doing this as a stim? I have NO IDEA. But every time I felt it was time to go that's what I did. And I do apologize if this is too much information. I'm just trying to figure out why I did what I did.

 

[Keigan]

Google - Autism avoiding bowel movements

 

[Jdeisher]

Yeah. I can't find anything about it. At all.

 

[Keigan]

Yeah. I can't find anything about it. At all.

The exact details maybe not, though if you step back and look at the general behavior - spectrum.

 

[Jdeisher]

I was told I was lactose intolerant, and maybe it was a constipation or bad or painful movement that made me fear going. I just think this is crazy how all of these things are fitting in. They told me I was lactose intolerant, but was I? Or was it autism that was never diagnosed. My entire life I avoided dairy and now I eat it on a daily basis and have no issues. Maybe I was never lactose intolerant, and I just had gastro problems. Which is common with autism.

 

[Jdeisher]

and the punching was the soothing, stim to me

 

[Keigan]

Keep researching, spectrum not being exacting examples - be open to facts and experiences of others.

The bottom line is that what you find does not change who you are today, you are still a man, a husband and a father.

If you feel that ASD or AS is a fit, then it probably is. It does help to create understanding and acceptance, just be aware that over time research becomes a self-filling prophecy, as well as all consuming.

You’ll eventually research enough and then back off with a deep breath. We all do it.

 

[Keigan]

And also, mis-diagnosis of aspie traits is very common.

 

[Suzanne]

And also, mis-diagnosis of aspie traits is very common.

Yes, I met an "aspie" female not long ago and I thought: no, you are not an aspie. She is very young and was proud to tick off her hand, the things that are wrong with her and interestingly she said: I have aspergers and autism. She is very rude and insulting too ( I was told by her auntie) and so, I feel sure she has been mis diagnosed and using it, to get her own way.

She had no trouble with holding eye contact. The point is, she is a young person and in truth, came across as a bit simple, so I doubt she is a deep thinker, in which case, she would not think: I will try to concentrate on making eye contact.

Shame that some are wrongfully diagnosed as aspies, and those who are so clearly an aspie, but do not tick the boxes, are told they are not.

 

[Suzanne]

I joined aspie central, because at the time and perhaps still, there is no chance for me to get an official diagnosis and so, I decided the best way to find out, is to join a forum where aspies are and that way, I will soon find the answer.

A fraud is what I felt at first, but very soon, I came to the concusion that indeed I have aspergers. The crazy first recognision is the fact that no one types in text form!

I have already got a wide vocab going on; but terrible with pronounciations. And now, I say that my vocabulary is even wider and often, my husband will ask what the heck I am saying. I do not say it to be seen as smarter than him. The word just pops up and fits and so, I say it.

I also went out of my way to befriend officially diagnoised female aspies and there is so much harmony going on, that the self doubt, just slipped away.

I cannot answer to why you stopped yourself going to the toilet to deficate, but what I can tell you, that I would stop myself going, because of the shame. I HATE anything to do with ablutions. I can say: I have got constipation; but I cannot say I have the other!

I guess that the IBS I suffer from, is related to the amount of times, I needed to go, but would not go and the cramps that I got, were enough to make me want to cry, but I refused to go.

It is rather strange though, because I have a lot of digestion issues etc and yet, every morning, I go to the toilet like clock work.

Stimming to me is a comfort action.

Oh and to just answer from your other thread about lining things up. I did this when I was a child. My grandpa would find that all his shoes were in a row, tied with the laces and the poor man had to spend time untangling that. I actually have absolutely no recollection of doing this, but it is as clear as if it were yesterday, hearing my gran say that when you were little, you used to tie grandpa's shoes together.

 

[Jdeisher]

I understand that autism can be easily misdiagnosed, but after talking with quite a few on my other threads this past weekend, there is no doubt in my mind that this is who I am. This bathroom thing was just another behavior that I wanted to have addressed because it was abnormal and I did it for so long. If you did read my other threads then you do know the things I did and still do.

 

[Chance]

Hi J and welcome,

The gut punching thing... no idea if that is ASD, BUT over thinking and staying in your head with it...
There is the ASD... Hung up on thoughts... We get to thinking on something and just cant stop.
Sometimes we get obsessed with things (hopefully not poop) but we learn more about stuff then others.
Stuff (even weird stuff) catches our attention and we just grab on to it, like a fish with a shiny lure. We just go all out hook, line, and sinker on things that the rest of the world never even notice.

Now that things are normal, just try and let it go maybe, and don't punch yourself too much. : )

By the way IBS is a huge part of ASD, and maybe you just dealt with it very differently. I was (still am) horrified of public restrooms... I will hold it till I am nearly dying. So, there is my sad confession. You aren't alone in weird bathroom habits.

 

[Dadwith2Autisticsons]

i have a few questions that i could not find on google. when i was really young, i would say after being potty trained, i had issues using the bathroom(number 2). it wasn't that i couldn't go, i literally refused to go, until it wasn't possible to hold in anymore. i remember it very well, because i did it all the way up to age 22. now i used to use my fist, and punch my lower abdomen, right where my intestines were. and of course it was an embarrassing thing to me and still is so i never ever brought it up to anyone. but i cant understand why i did it. and when i punched myself, it would be exactly 7 times, with the same amount of force. i am still self diagnosed right now and still trying to get my childhood struggles together from my mother. she said i had a very high tolerance to pain. where nothing hurt. was i doing this as a stim? i have NO IDEA. but everytime i felt it was time to go that's what i did. and i do apologize if this is to much information. I'm just trying to figure out why i did what i did.

Dylan, our youngest at age five with both Autism and ADHD, has numerous problems with bowel movements and he is not potty trained yet. There could me many different reasons for his issues and delays there.

First, he is too hyperactive and cannot follow any direction, and is too impatient to sit. He goes many days without going in his diaper, and always stands up and leans forward when he does such. Again, he rarely stays seated for anything and is often running around.

Dylan has had gastrointestinal problems and very severe eating difficulty his entire life. He always had problems with anything dairy, and with any sweets and fruits and vegetables. And it is a struggle too to get liquids in him. So, that can play a role as well.

He has often had constipation problems and painful bowel movements, as seen by his intense crying while in the process of such, which may occur only once to twice a week. In Dylan's case though, he is oversensitive to pain. Our older son Aaron is the one undersensitive to pain. He never cried for any injury.

For your case, it thus could be any number of reasons, too. Gastrointestinal, a very painful bowel movement early on, so then you started avoiding having those, though you said you were or are undersensitive to pain now, or a rigid routine to avoid bowel movements once that started. Or, maybe you subconsciously or consciously wanted to feel pain, so you held it in, and that is why you started hitting yourself in the stomach, too to get those ones out.

Regardless, such issues are not uncommon with one on the Spectrum, especiallly when young. Some have those issues, and some do not.

 

[Jdeisher]

Thank you all, for the help. That is another big thing. I refuse to use public bathrooms. I always have, I thought it was because I was weird. I would rather suffer in pain then use the toilet, and to this day I cannot use the bathroom if someone is in there, even my wife. And I refuse to like even pass gas around her. For 26 years I thought I was just a weird person with lots of phobias.

 

[Chance]

Thank you all, for the help. That is another big thing. I refuse to use public bathrooms. I always have, I thought it was because I was weird. I would rather suffer in pain then use the toilet, and to this day I cannot use the bathroom if someone is in there, even my wife. And I refuse to like even pass gas around her. For 26 years I thought I was just a weird person with lots of phobias.

Same here... we are in the same weird club... Are we suppose to be proud of that? : ) confused...

Maybe we just cant get past all the germs, smells, and noises... Grossing myself out thinking about it.
Shaking it off and moving on now...