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Datura

Well-Known Member
A friend of mine who suffers from fibromialgia just introduced me to the concept of "spoon theory". The general premise is that people with chronic illnesses only have a limited number of "spoons" that that they can expend during a day before they are whiped out. As a result they must plan every part of their day much more carefully than people who are healthy.

It occured to me that this might paralell the experience of people on the spectrum. What do you think?

http://www.butyoudontlooksick.com/articles/written-by-christine/the-spoon-theory/
 
I had a friend years ago who had a chronic condition, who introduced me to this concept. I think it relates to aspergers and several other conditions - not just chronic illnesses.
 
There's a YouTuber I watch who made a video on the Spoon Theory a little while ago. I thought it was very accurate. I remember at school my friend would try to get me over his house after a long day of working and socialising and I just didn't have the energy for it, I just needed to go home and engage in solitary activities until the next school day. It just took so much out of me that I couldn't do anything else, I even felt like that when I was working full time, doing crappy hours. There was just not enough hours in the day to fully recover from it all.
 
I never heard of the theory before, but in practice have followed the general premise for quite a while.
 
I never heard of the theory before, but in practice have followed the general premise for quite a while.

It's not a theory. it's just a symbolic representation for how to budget or manage a "limited" resource. In this case of the spoon, the quantity of spoon(s)(like drawing straws.) is use to symbolically represent the quantity of the limited resource, like the charge on a battery, or how much fuel is in the tank. In the case of autistic people, performing daily activities is a lot like running a marathon, you have to pace yourself. Everyday, when you wake up in the morning, like a money allowance, you get a certain number of spoons for that day, and when you perform certain activities, it will cost you a spoon or two. Once you used up all your spoons, you're done for the day, like you just spent all your allowance for the day, you're broke, you're empty, you're out.
 
Yes. For some of us, social interactions take up a huge amount of spoons. Managing the steps of self care... Lots more spoons. Handling the back and forth of a conversation, maybe most of the spoons. Spoons low? Shutdown or meltdown is imminent, as demands continue. It is hard for some of us to plan, but with spoons to manage, we really have to decide which engagements and activities we can afford each day.
 
Interesting. While I've never tried to quantify my emotional, mental and physical resources, I've always had a routine of winding down in the event of exhaustion. Where I'll simply cease communicating...and if necessary simply leave whatever situation I'm in.

So in essence while I realize I have only so many "spoons" when attempting to mask my autism, I just don't mathematically ration them as different situations require different expenditures of energy.
 
I remember this topic from several months ago.
Maybe it was in somebody's blog here, when there still
were blogs. Maybe it was mentioned in a thread.

I mentioned it to my NT friend.
I remember that she didn't find it a useful
image. It seemed very contrived to her.

Having spoons. Running out of spoons.

Good thing it was spoons the author grabbed instead of
a bag of marbles. Saying she ran out of marbles might
sound like she was saying she'd lost her marbles.
That wouldn't illustrate the concept of running out
of strength/coping ability.


 
This rang so true with me I had a little cry. I think it may have cost me a spoon to read it and I'm not even out of bed yet!
 
Yeah, spoons seems a dense analogy to me. Battery level, or even savings/credit, works better in my thinking. I often feel in the 'red' after a full/emotional week. Very rare I am well in the 'black'.

I did subconsciously weigh up everything to see if the energy expenditure was worth it. The older I get, the less anything seems worth it. I obviously need more stimulation.
 
Yeah, spoons seems a dense analogy to me. Battery level, or even savings/credit, works better in my thinking. I often feel in the 'red' after a full/emotional week. Very rare I am well in the 'black'.

I did subconsciously weigh up everything to see if the energy expenditure was worth it. The older I get, the less anything seems worth it. I obviously need more stimulation.
I think it's social fatigue and sequencing problems for me specifically but 'spoons' seem easier for NTs to understand so I use the analogy for that purpose really. Your battery/savings both work too. It's all terminology for 'bed time' in my eyes! [emoji4]
 
Spoons works just fine is you don't have a dishwasher....living as a bachlor going to school with a limited set of eating utensils...you learn to butter your bread with spoons and forks if you have to. Otherwise you have to take time to do the dishes again, and yes eating over the sink happens if you don't feel like dirtying up your last plate. I finally started using paper plates so I didn't have to wash dishes all the time.:rolleyes:

But yes the physical and emotional count down to zero energy goes more quickly for some of us in the day, sometimes I am just toast after lunch.:confused:
 
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How do you get more spoons? What sort of things fill your souls back up to a capacity so that you can better cope with the world?
 
These are my coping mechanisms that restore me so I can function in the world:

- Alone time.
- Daily baths in the dark.
- Exercise.
- Breathing meditation.
- Hobbies, like video games.
- Avoiding caffeine and alcohol.
- Nature.
 

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