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Social pressure regarding marriage


Well-Known Member
V.I.P Member
I'm sick and tired of female colleagues asking me when i'm gonna get married. Apparently i can't just tell them that i'm a social retard when it comes to flirting/dating, and that my current long term relationship isn't working. We are still together cause of financial security, neither i nor she can live independently on our current salaries but the feelings are gone and we are quite incompatible aside from that, relationship has no future. Well they know that part about finances and the current state of our relationship but still... man, wish that i could just shout out to them that I'm autistic and it's insanely hard for me to find anyone, don't know if they see that i am. I'm masking of course but it's not a particularly good mask.
She is my 1st and i haven't had any experience before in any sense. My teenage and youthful years are filled with crippling isolation regarding that part of the social scene. I had friends but the girls i had a crush on quietly avoided me with some comments coming from the people (like gay, retard, he's probably gonna kill himself before the age of 25) behind my back. My feelings in that regard are really intense and each of those crush related rejections hurted like hell for a very long time leaving me severely traumatized with depression and anxiety in it's wake.

Question- it is okay for both you and your "partner" to be dating other people? You should clearly have this talk 1-1 with your "partner".

If she says "yes", when your colleagues ask you about "when you're getting married", the you can consider asking them if they want to date you in reply. When they ask about your long term relationship, you can tell them that you had a talk with your girlfriend in-person and you both agreed that you could date other people. If they want to pry more, tell them that you can tell them more 1-1 if they take you on a date.


Update: We broke up and i found a cheap apartment near my current residence. I feel devastated, I've known it for a long time, it was hanging in the air but it still hurts like hell now that it actually happened. I'm paralyzed with grief, sorrow and anxiety now and i don't know what to do now, nothing makes sense :sob::sob::sob:


Well-Known Member
V.I.P Member
I’m so sorry! Breaking up feels so terrible. You feel all alone. You do have support and caring here. Hang in there. It will get better. You don’t have to do anything right now. Just take care of yourself.

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