Saying the words but, not feeling them.

[Wolfnox]

If you tell someone you love them. But, don't feel it should you say it?
Even knowing it might make them feel better?

 

[OkRad]

No.

 

[Owliet]

If you tell someone you love them. But, don't feel it should you say it?
Even knowing it might make them feel better?

I find it hard to even say i love you to people regardless if I want to say it or not. It’s pretty awkward to say out loud and when I don’t mean it, I feel like it’s forced. If you don’t mean it, how can you say it witch sincerity?

 

[Forest Cat]

I think you should say you love people if you love them.

 

[Wolfnox]

I think you should say you love people if you love them.

It's the feeling part I have trouble with. Like with family. I know I care. But, the feeling isn't there. I should feel something. But, mostly I feel neutral. Or too many emotions at once.

 

[Judge]

I find it hard to even say i love you to people regardless if I want to say it or not. It’s pretty awkward to say out loud and when I don’t mean it, I feel like it’s forced. If you don’t mean it, how can you say it with sincerity?

This got me into terrible trouble in one relationship I thought I cherished. I was right, I cherished it. I was wrong, in not telling her when I should have. Feeling the words, but not being able to actually say them. WTH ???? So dysfunctional...

Where some of my emotions seem to have "short-circuited". As to why, I have never been able to explain it. Though I'm certain it has something to do with my autism. Something that has haunted me for well more than 30 years.

 

[Forest Cat]

It's the feeling part I have trouble with. Like with family. I know I care. But, the feeling isn't there. I should feel something. But, mostly I feel neutral. Or too many emotions at once.

If you care about your family and maybe especially parents, I think you should tell them you love them. Or at least that you care about them. Family needs to hear that. I never told my dad anything like that and I regret it.

 

[Raggamuffin]

Apart from my first girlfriend, saying "I love you" always felt hollow.

Ed

 

[Storm Hess]

If you tell someone you love them. But, don't feel it should you say it?
Even knowing it might make them feel better?

This is the hardest concept I have at this moment in my life. I feel numb...have for many decades. I don't know if it's something that transpired in my development, but I have a difficult time showing emotion to anyone. When my friend died was difficult and I felt that...numb again.

 

[clg114]

I tell my wife that I love her every day and I tell my kids every time that I see them. It's important.

 

[Wolfnox]

If you care about your family and maybe especially parents, I think you should tell them you love them. Or at least that you care about them. Family needs to hear that. I never told my dad anything like that and I regret it.

I do. It helps. The feeling part is the trouble. Still if it helps them I will say it.

 

[Aspychata]

I do. It helps. The feeling part is the trouble. Still if it helps them I will say it.

Or say you truly care for them. Maybe that's easier to say with conviction vs the l luv u phrase.

 

[Alexej]

If you tell someone you love them. But, don't feel it should you say it?
Even knowing it might make them feel better?

Pedantic sidestep - how can you want to say to someone that you love them if you dont feel it. IMHO love is not something you arrive at intellectually.

However as a self diagnosed alexithymic what do I know about feeling?

 

[AprilR]

If they need to hear it, why not say it? If you want to make them happy but also want to be honest to them so you are questioning yourself, doesn't it already mean you care about those people? So it is not a lie to say it.