There are so many comments (yes, justified) about NT's not understanding us and our thought processes. Shoot, we don't understand a lot of it ourselves. We seem to have this need to understand how our mind works because we know we are different? I know I am very self analytical and is it because I know I'm different? Because we question so much about ourselves?
I noticed we complain a lot about NT's not understanding us, but how well do we understand them? How much time do we take to understand how other people's minds work and think? I don't think like an NT so I can not know how they think. I often ask my daughter in law specific questions about her way of thinking or seeing things and we compare. It's interesting to see the differences.
I'm still thinking about all the different comments on empathy and I'm wondering how much the emotions we're picking up on are from our own discomforts. And how do we know if we're truly feeling what they are feeling if we can't get inside their heads? Outside stimuli influences how we feel - noises, lights, chaotic movements, smells - so how much of what we're feeling is related to something specific and how much is related to everything else around us? It's hard because there are so many things going on that our brain is taking in and not distinguishing one from the other and something innocent suddenly becomes a nightmare. I can't be upset with the NT's for not understanding what that's like - how could they possibly?
I remember reading an article about how the brain processes fear. In an NT brain, the part of the brain that picks up fear sends the signal to the part that interprets whether or not it is actually something to fear - so it analyzes before sending it to the fight or flight part of our brain. Our fear signal passes over the interpreting part and even though we might realize it's not something to fear we still go into the fight or flight mode. IE: Oh that's just a mark on the wall, not a spider. A normal person is then fine, but we're not. We not only have already gone into that fight or flight mode, but it takes us much longer to return to normal. I like comparing what's going on in my brain with the NT brain and if something is going on with me I might can better explain to an NT the difference in their reaction and mine if I need to, but usually not because I'm not asking them to explain what is going on with them either.
Anyhow, that's one of the things that makes me feel selfish - because I want them to understand me and my thought processes being different, but I'm not as interested in understanding them and their thought processes - other than to compare.
Thoughts? (Didn't mean the pun. lol)
I noticed we complain a lot about NT's not understanding us, but how well do we understand them? How much time do we take to understand how other people's minds work and think? I don't think like an NT so I can not know how they think. I often ask my daughter in law specific questions about her way of thinking or seeing things and we compare. It's interesting to see the differences.
I'm still thinking about all the different comments on empathy and I'm wondering how much the emotions we're picking up on are from our own discomforts. And how do we know if we're truly feeling what they are feeling if we can't get inside their heads? Outside stimuli influences how we feel - noises, lights, chaotic movements, smells - so how much of what we're feeling is related to something specific and how much is related to everything else around us? It's hard because there are so many things going on that our brain is taking in and not distinguishing one from the other and something innocent suddenly becomes a nightmare. I can't be upset with the NT's for not understanding what that's like - how could they possibly?
I remember reading an article about how the brain processes fear. In an NT brain, the part of the brain that picks up fear sends the signal to the part that interprets whether or not it is actually something to fear - so it analyzes before sending it to the fight or flight part of our brain. Our fear signal passes over the interpreting part and even though we might realize it's not something to fear we still go into the fight or flight mode. IE: Oh that's just a mark on the wall, not a spider. A normal person is then fine, but we're not. We not only have already gone into that fight or flight mode, but it takes us much longer to return to normal. I like comparing what's going on in my brain with the NT brain and if something is going on with me I might can better explain to an NT the difference in their reaction and mine if I need to, but usually not because I'm not asking them to explain what is going on with them either.
Anyhow, that's one of the things that makes me feel selfish - because I want them to understand me and my thought processes being different, but I'm not as interested in understanding them and their thought processes - other than to compare.
Thoughts? (Didn't mean the pun. lol)