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My friend

PokemonManiac

PokemonManiac

Well-Known Member
V.I.P Member
I have a friend called Ryan, he is really funny, I love his personality I actually think he is amazing especially with the things he goes through yet he is still able to laugh often when he talks to me

He has mentioned a few things which made me think does he have a crush me, he said he thinks of me often even when he is feeling down
I make him laugh and he said I make him happy, if he knows I'm upset I've noticed he struggles to handle it cause I know I mean alot to him and he kicks himself that he can't be here to comfort me (he lives in England and I live in Wales at the moment) also he says to me "never change" I promised him I won't

He does joke alot with me and I quickly accepted that is him, even if I'm not joking at first he tends to make jokes which is funny I've accepted he does that and all honesty I never want him to change either

He did have another female friend but he can't be bothered with her anymore cause he found it so difficult to talk to her in the end (I'm gutted he lost another friend) cause I want him to be able to have friends

Im left wondering if he has a crush on me cause I'm often on his mind he never says to people that they mean alot to him, but he has said to me that I mean a hell of a lot to him and he has fun speaking to me
I've promised I will stick by him, (unfortunately others have promised him the same) but they gave up on him
I want to keep the promise cause it is important to both of us

What do others think of this friendship? Is it difficult to say he has a crush on me?
 
It's hard to say by what you described, but it's obvious you mean a lot to him. Maybe just try asking him how he really feels about you? I found that's a better approach than just sitting there wondering.
 
I can't really tell. It might be just an emotional friendship, a confidant, he sees in you, and not necessarily a relationship he seeks. I think you see that a lot on the internet.
 
We text each other and talk on the phone mostly we are planning to meet up in person too

I would try asking, but I would let him make the first move
 
I said we haven't....not exactly easy just to walk up to someone in public and say hey can I have your number or say to them hey can I be your friend :smirk:
 
CareBear26 said:
What do others think of this friendship? Is it difficult to say he has a crush on me?
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Just be aware that if he is on the autism spectrum, he very likely won't be able to interpret what you say, so if you want him to know something, you have to actually say something, not hope that he'll work it out. Also, he will probably be very blunt and say exactly what he means, so don't look for something unspoken in what he means.

Lastly, if he is on the spectrum, he may never make the first move, and waiting for him to do so could prove very disappointing. In fact he may think that his behaviour towards you is the first move, and be waiting for you to respond. If so, when he doesn't get a reaction from you, he could conclude that he was mistaken in thinking you like him.

The basic lesson here is that if you want there to be anything with him, don't wait, do something about it.
 
Well only reason why I said I would wait is cause he has had more relationships and I'm also on the spectrum I'm never good at asking people out

And I thought I'd wait till I've at least meet up with him cause i was with someone else I was dating this ex before I even met him in person and when I finally stayed with him I was just a huge disappointment to him so he ended the relationship as soon as I got home (this was about a few months before I started talking to my current friend)
 
Then my mistake for assuming he's the one on the spectrum!

Turned around, you need to be aware that he may be sending you signals that he thinks you can interpret and could be waiting for you to respond.

If you are both on the spectrum you'd think it should be easy, but it may not be easy to communicate clearly. However, if he has had previous relationships and seems more practiced, it does make sense to try and wait for him to act. But you still might have to if he seems reluctant to.

Many people, on the spectrum or not, find it very hard to take the first step if they lack confidence it will be reciprocated.
 
CareBear26 said:
I said we haven't....not exactly easy just to walk up to someone in public and say hey can I have your number or say to them hey can I be your friend :smirk:
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It was unclear to me, which is why I asked. Anyway, I think you shouldn't read to much into your current interactions and stop overanalyzing until you've met in person. It's easy to get super invested in people online because you both get to choose what side of you the other person gets to see. It makes perception of one another a little warped.
 
Friendship sounds fine for a long distance one. Bit odd that you want to stick with him while knowing he drops people easily instead of working on being able to talk to them after one troubled meet up experience. I hope he doesn't disappoint you like that if or when he meets you in person. Best wishes.
 
Otenba said:
Friendship sounds fine for a long distance one. Bit odd that you want to stick with him while knowing he drops people easily instead of working on being able to talk to them after one troubled meet up experience. I hope he doesn't disappoint you like that if or when he meets you in person. Best wishes.
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I don't think you read my post properly.....I was describing my ex boyfriend as he's the one that dumped me after meeting up with him (my ex name begin with E)

I have no clue why you thought that about my current friend when I mentioned the word "problem"

And with my current friend hes not the one drops people they are ones to leave his life just can't they can't handle him
 
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CareBear26 said:
I don't think you read my post properly.....I was describing my ex boyfriend as he's the one that dumped me after meeting up with him (my ex name begin with E)

I have no clue why you thought that about my current friend when I mentioned the word "problem"

And with my current friend hes not the one drops people they are ones to leave his life just can't they can't handle him
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There's no mention of an ex in your original post so yeah, if you're gonna omit information, I can't help you since you weren't clear in the first place.
 
If you actually read the thread I mentioned my ex a few posts down

Plus my current friend had problems talking to another person when ever he would try talking to hear all she said most time that she doesn't like things she said it to a lot of things he tried to talk about....so yeah very easy for him to continue talking to that friend if theres nothing in common
 
And plus I know most Aspergers people are good with writing out details
But Im alot different to others with Asperger's and Can struggle
 
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