lifeinsolitude
Well-Known Member
Hello, I know I'm not very active and I am somewhat new here; but I do not have many places to turn, other than facebook, and I am tired of flooding statuses with my issues. I hope nobody minds me sharing an issue I am having right now. I am not sure if this goes here or the issues related autism spectrum disorders part. This is mostly just a part of my life I am dealing with, but it does pertain to change. Therefore, the mods can do what they want with this topic. 
My fiance, whom I met on Wrongplanet/Aspie Affection back in 2007 (I no longer go there); just lost another job. I say "another", not because he is not capable of working, or that he loses job after job; but because he did lose a long term job back in 2011. He was working as temporary for 18 months at a help desk for a bank called "Key Bank". Eric did great on the job, he is so great with computers and helping people, plus teaching them as well. However he didn't have super great attendance. Eric isn't lazy or doesn't like to skip work a lot; the commute is/was 50 mins, Eric also struggles a little bit with mild insomnia. Eric was also sometimes late for work in the beginning, when we had to move down to my Mother's when he lost his previous job. The commute was/is long and he has trouble with mornings. Even though Eric is/was a great worker he will not be hired. My fiance works until the end of this month, then he will be let go. He should be able to get unemployment, he should also either get another temporary job through his recruiter or find another job himself.
Sadly we were just about to move to the Cleveland area for the job and it all fell apart. We currently live in Akron, Ohio with my mother. My Mom is very cool and laid back. She spoils me and lets me have an easy life, even though I am adult. I barely have to pay to live with her, nor does Eric. However we do help her to some degree. I am on SSI disability, because I have bipolar disorder, severe anxiety, along with the AS, but I wasn't Dxed' with AS when I got on SSI. I cannot handle the stress of a paying job. I do however, volunteer with animals. I also help my Mom by taking care of her house while she works. My mother has serious health problems, so as long as Eric and I are not clashing and arguing around her a lot, she benefits from us living here. I have OCD and like to clean/organize so my Mom's house and those around me, or my own place if that were the case, is always pretty much clean! I also take care of our 3 dogs. My Mother had a stroke this past September 25th, 2012. If I hadn't been at home/living at home, she would not be here today. She is perfectly fine from the stroke however, because I responded to her fall so fast, the EMS arrived very fast! Hospitals are very close here as well. She has a lot of heart problems, problems with her weight and getting around, and her severe sleep apnea. Anyways, I just found a place to live, I literally was just going to get the keys the next day and we were going to make the deposit/rent when we got the news of his job. Obviously the change is a shock and a major disappointment. However, I am trying to keep up the attitude that; everything happens for a reason, it will get better, stay positive, and so on.
To sum this all up. I do NOT handle change at all, but I did handle this one well, because....I didn't have much choice, as I wanted to be there for Eric; whom is handling it worse than me. Eric basically feels like a failure, I tell him he is not, it just wasn't met to be. He just has to learn and grow from it, and move I guess. I am trying to stay strong. It would be worse if I didn't like my Mother's house or living with her, but I do. I just wish the house was in Cleveland, but she can't just up and sell the place and move, even though she works in that area as well. I basically wanted to move back there, but still come down weekly to help Mom; because of his job, liking that area, and my best friend lives up there who doesn't drive. I guess life goes on...:balanced:
My fiance, whom I met on Wrongplanet/Aspie Affection back in 2007 (I no longer go there); just lost another job. I say "another", not because he is not capable of working, or that he loses job after job; but because he did lose a long term job back in 2011. He was working as temporary for 18 months at a help desk for a bank called "Key Bank". Eric did great on the job, he is so great with computers and helping people, plus teaching them as well. However he didn't have super great attendance. Eric isn't lazy or doesn't like to skip work a lot; the commute is/was 50 mins, Eric also struggles a little bit with mild insomnia. Eric was also sometimes late for work in the beginning, when we had to move down to my Mother's when he lost his previous job. The commute was/is long and he has trouble with mornings. Even though Eric is/was a great worker he will not be hired. My fiance works until the end of this month, then he will be let go. He should be able to get unemployment, he should also either get another temporary job through his recruiter or find another job himself.
Sadly we were just about to move to the Cleveland area for the job and it all fell apart. We currently live in Akron, Ohio with my mother. My Mom is very cool and laid back. She spoils me and lets me have an easy life, even though I am adult. I barely have to pay to live with her, nor does Eric. However we do help her to some degree.
I am on SSI disability, because I have bipolar disorder, severe anxiety, along with the AS, but I wasn't Dxed' with AS when I got on SSI. I cannot handle the stress of a paying job. I do however, volunteer with animals. I also help my Mom by taking care of her house while she works. My mother has serious health problems, so as long as Eric and I are not clashing and arguing around her a lot, she benefits from us living here. I have OCD and like to clean/organize so my Mom's house and those around me, or my own place if that were the case, is always pretty much clean! I also take care of our 3 dogs. My Mother had a stroke this past September 25th, 2012. If I hadn't been at home/living at home, she would not be here today. She is perfectly fine from the stroke however, because I responded to her fall so fast, the EMS arrived very fast! Hospitals are very close here as well. She has a lot of heart problems, problems with her weight and getting around, and her severe sleep apnea. Anyways, I just found a place to live, I literally was just going to get the keys the next day and we were going to make the deposit/rent when we got the news of his job. Obviously the change is a shock and a major disappointment. However, I am trying to keep up the attitude that; everything happens for a reason, it will get better, stay positive, and so on.To sum this all up. I do NOT handle change at all, but I did handle this one well, because....I didn't have much choice, as I wanted to be there for Eric; whom is handling it worse than me. Eric basically feels like a failure, I tell him he is not, it just wasn't met to be. He just has to learn and grow from it, and move I guess. I am trying to stay strong. It would be worse if I didn't like my Mother's house or living with her, but I do. I just wish the house was in Cleveland, but she can't just up and sell the place and move, even though she works in that area as well. I basically wanted to move back there, but still come down weekly to help Mom; because of his job, liking that area, and my best friend lives up there who doesn't drive. I guess life goes on...:balanced:
