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My brother doesn't take my mental health seriously

Oz67

Well-Known Member
Every time I talk about my mild depression related to Bipolar Disorder to my brother, he gets mad at me and tells me to get over it. I am sorry, I can't help it. I am seriously mentally ill.
 
And who else wants to just sweep such issues under a rug, so they don't have to deal with them?

Damn near everyone, from my reckoning. Stigmatization- on steroids. That if they don't have it, they don't want to deal with it in part or in whole. Speaks poorly for us as a species. Sometimes I think most of humanity are Social Darwinists. Those aggressively or passively advocating the "Survival of the fittest". Until it happens to them. :rolleyes:
 
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All I can think of is my situation,...they don't want you to have a "diagnosis",...of anything, because in their mind, creates some embarrassment for them. They just don't want to deal with any of it,...so they push it aside and then make a "moral diagnosis" of their own,..."You are a bad person.". "Everyone's got a label these days." "You're the way you are because you choose to be that way."

Family is "fun" to deal with,...not! I pretty much stopped communicating with mine,...after a little bit of guilt,...a little bit,...my life has a lot less stress in it.

The bottom line: You can't fix THAT. Stop bringing it up around family,...as it only "triggers" them.
 
Every time I talk about my mild depression related to Bipolar Disorder to my brother, he gets mad at me and tells me to get over it. I am sorry, I can't help it. I am seriously mentally ill.
The problem is with your brother. Something happened to him that makes him shun any emotional mental stuff, some people cope or fail to cope that way, it is not you.
 
The problem is with your brother. Something happened to him that makes him shun any emotional mental stuff, some people cope or fail to cope that way, it is not you.
Sounds like my own older brother as well. When my mother became ill and unable to care for herself he wasn't about to consider taking her on as her caregiver.
 
Every time I talk about my mild depression related to Bipolar Disorder to my brother, he gets mad at me and tells me to get over it. I am sorry, I can't help it. I am seriously mentally ill.
It infuriates me when family, who should be the biggest support, treats you like that.
 
I'm not trying to minimize your issues because they're obviously important, but that's basically what having a brother is like in a nutshell. My brother does that kind of thing to me, and against my better judgement, I do it back. Sibling rivalry (or some equivalent) really does persist into adulthood.
 
Sounds like my own older brother as well. When my mother became ill and unable to care for herself he wasn't about to consider taking her on as her caregiver.

Same with my brother and some of my sisters. My mom had a terrible accident falling down the stairs giving her a TBI on top of her early dementia at the time. For 5 years my stepdad, myself, eldest sister, and 24 year old nephew were it. I destroyed a vehicle driving down to take her to neurologists and take care of her constantly yet my brother and sisters didn't lift a finger. One didn't even go see her before she died a few weeks ago despite being hounded to do it, now she's trying to garner sympathy because she didn't get to say goodbye.

My mother had problems and made many mistakes, but she wasn’t a terrible mother or person. I can't say I particularly liked my mom's personality or behaviors over the years. But she was my mom so I did love her and as such despite her flaws and mistakes, I owed her as much care as I could give without making my children sacrifice their needs and all wants.

My sister that did help is furious to the point of unhealthy at our other siblings which I do understand how that feeling came about, but it's not going to change them so I don't understand the point of holding the anger. They're the ones who will have to live with themselves, not us. We did what we could. I'm at peace with it.
 
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Every time I talk about my mild depression related to Bipolar Disorder to my brother, he gets mad at me and tells me to get over it. I am sorry, I can't help it. I am seriously mentally ill.

Think about it from his perspective. Unless he's a therapist, he probably doesn't know much about bipolar disorder or how to treat it. How would you feel and react if your brother repeatedly told you about a condition he had that you didn't understand and weren't aware of anything you could do to help? He may be sad that you're struggling and frustrated because he doesn't know anything he can do to help you feel better.

If you want him to respond a certain way (such as empathizing with you) to help you feel better, you'll probably have to tell him directly since many guys will assume you want advice and get frustrated if they can't provide it.
 
Think about it from his perspective. Unless he's a therapist, he probably doesn't know much about bipolar disorder or how to treat it. How would you feel and react if your brother repeatedly told you about a condition he had that you didn't understand and weren't aware of anything you could do to help? He may be sad that you're struggling and frustrated because he doesn't know anything he can do to help you feel better.

If you want him to respond a certain way (such as empathizing with you) to help you feel better, you'll probably have to tell him directly since many guys will assume you want advice and get frustrated if they can't provide it.

That is the mistake I made. I fixed it and it worked. When I told my brother about delusions of grandeur I had, he was not mad at me, because I responded to him in a way you suggested.
 

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